Marriage!

Hare Krishna!

All glories to Guru and Gaurang!

Dandvat to all the devotees!

I am from a hindu & sikh religion family, connected to KC from last 2 years appox, doing 16 rounds and following all the principles, now i have a great pressure for marriage from my family, i dont want to marry a non devotee family, can anybody please help me that where i can contact for matrimonial help? I am just putting my query in front of all the devotees because i am scared i my family find out any non devotee guy then my devotion path can be come to an end. Please help me the thought of getting far from KC is making me tremble. i know i should not write these things on this platform but only here i can approach my all the senior devotees altogether to please give me some guidance..because only all of can understand my concern.

Regards

Deepa Ahuja

You need to be a member of ISKCON Desire Tree | IDT to add comments!

Join ISKCON Desire Tree | IDT

Email me when people reply –

Replies

        • Hare Krishna

          How practical is it to remain brahmacharini especially when there are no ISKCON ashrams in India that I know of. Please correct me if I am wrong.

          Is it not better to marry karmi rather then being a brahmacharini or if a devotee husband is not found in proper time/age.

          Dear Deepa Mataji

          No doubt , the best thing for you is to look out for some devotees who can spend his life with you worshiping Krishna together .That would be an ideal scenario.

          However if your karma doesn't allow that to happen because of time/age/family constraints/previous birth debts, please do not worry even if you get married to a karmi. Just keep praying.

          I know one of my friends sister's husband who was a meat-eater/drunker got converted to a pure devotee in association with her wife.

          So please don't get upset , keep praying to Krishna and let things happen as planned by Krishna.You try your best.

          jai shree gokulesh

          • Volunteer

            How practical is it to remain brahmacharini especially when there are no ISKCON ashrams in India that I know of. Please correct me if I am wrong.

            Is it not better to marry karmi rather then being a brahmacharini or if a devotee husband is not found in proper time/age.

            You are right dear Alka Mataji, there is no brahmacharini ashram in India.

            And it is really not good for a girl to remain unmarried and not to become a mother. Only motherhood helps her to correct her qualities from selfishness to selflessness. Because of that for matajis it is very important to have children and make them Krishna Conscious.

            ---------

            In other sides i know even in India some matajis who did not get married even in their 30-33 years age. They just do their sadhana and earn money and just live but i do not know if they are satisfied with such like life. It might be very difficult. 

             The best thing, You correctly wrote, TO PRAY TO KRISHNA AND HE WILL SURELY TAKE CARE OF IT. No need to go for Demigods or something like that but just to try to please Lord Gauranga and in due course of time He will arrange our lives.

            It is for sure.

            Your servant,

  • Volunteer

    The discussion posted was different and the actual discussion happening is completely different now. :D

    • Volunteer

      but it is connected to the title of the discussion Prabhuji :) so in this way there is hope that Devotees will get benefit out of these questions and answers.

      Your servant,

      • Volunteer

        All that I see is 2 devotees arguing thats all.

        Please forgive me for any offences.

  • Volunteer

    There are many matrimony websites for devotees. I know couple of them. They are http://marryadevotee.com/ and http://www.vivahamitra.net/en/public_html/

    You can register yourself in these sites and try searching for a partner. All the best.

    • Volunteer

      my humble obeisances!

      Sudheendra Prabhu, do You consider it is good for ISKCON ladies to register to such like web sites and won't be it like a show to all men???? It hurts me much when i see my friends putting their photos and all info ...which will be seen by everyone. 

      Do You think it is good since we are trying to enliven Vedic culture where young ladies were not shown to the public so easily, protecting their chastity and all?!

      Or it is only my mind's concoctions and it is ok for this age?

      Thank You!

      Your servant, 

      • Volunteer

        Hare Krishna Maral Mataji

        PAMHO. AGTSP. AGTSG&SG.

        I understand your concern. However, these websites are meant for devotees only and not for other outsiders. I have seen many prabhujees don't put their pic in their profile what to speak of matajies. But however since it is for marriage and we can not decide to live with some one without even seeing each others pic, we have to do some compromise also.

        The vedic style of finding the match was that parents alone would look the boy/girl and would decide if he/she is a good match or not. The first time the girl would see the boys face would be on the arena of marriage sacrificial fire only. This happened to some devotees even in ISKCON. SP told to one of his disciple who was from Australia and serving SP in US to go to some place in Asia where there was another mataji from some other part of the world, who had never met before nor had even seen the pics of each other nor had even spoke before over phone!!! SP said u both marry and stay together as husband and wife, and they did and even today are living happily together. This is possible only if we have that king of conviction and dedication our guru maharaj. We can not imitate it.

        We can easily find out who is a devotee and who is not in the first minute of our talk. So devotees should be little careful about bad elements that might creep in. But for that matter mataji don't we put our pics on other social networking sites like FB and other sites where there are 99.9999% of people are non devotees???

        We must be careful not to give toooooo much of personal information in the marriage matrimony sites. We can put all details of our devotional life and expectation from our partner. Preferably put a decent pic also. What we definitely need to avoid is to give our phone number or email ids or home/office address etc... This can be exchanged when necessary.

        I hope I did not offend you. Please forgive me if I did so.

        Hari bol!!!

        • Volunteer

          please accept my humble obeisances Prabhuji,

          please forgive for pasting posts with some oppositions to Your post but wanted to say that as we know from Mahabharata and Srimad Bhagavatam:

          Subhadra's marriage also was Vedic and she was agree to marry Arjuna because for long time she heard about his qualities. In this way it was not so that girl's opinion was not concerned.

          Also Kunti Devi heard many times about Pandu and herself selected him as her husband.

          Also Savitri by the request of her parents searched for her husband.

          Also Devahutti for a long time heard about the qualities of Kardama Muni.

          ...so in this way it is not so every time that couples do not see each other before marriage.

          In his lecture HH Bhakti Vidya Purna Swami Maharaj says that mostly selection should be done by girl because for her family life is the main meaning of her life but for man it is only supportive thing for his carrier. For him carrier is more important than family.

          And he tells that if lady selects herself then she will easily be chaste to him. And it says that if girl's side - parents approach boy's side then that marriage is the best and liberates 10 forefathers.

          -------------

          In web sites it is ok for prabhujis to upload their photos and infos but it is not good if it is done by ladies, i do not know but it is my opinion :(

          But the best way is for Deepa Mataji is to solve this problem firstly praying to Krishna and secondly with senior Devotees.

          Your servant, 

          • Volunteer

            mataji... this system of girl selecting the boy was there in kstrya families. all the matajies u have mentioned are princess of some kingdom. but people in general would not follow this tradition. what to speak of so old times... few decades ago when my parents and grand parents got married, they had not seen each other before marriage!!! but they lived together whole of their life.

This reply was deleted.