Is marriage important?

Hare Krishna!
Lord Krishna says in The Bhagavad-gita 'Prescribed duties should never be renounced. If one gives up his prescribed duties because of illusion, such renunciation is said to be in the mode of ignorance. Anyone who gives up prescribed duties as troublesome or out of fear of bodily discomfort is said to have renounced in the mode of passion. Such action never leads to the elevation of renunciation.' My doubt is 'is marriage important in todays life where there is a need of a compatible partner who can adjust in all situations? As there are 4 stages in a human life, one of them being "grihasta ashram". It is also one of the prescribed duty of a human being according to the Vedas. So is it compulsary to enter into a married life?

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      • Hare Krishna,
        I have delayed in replying to you. There is a very thin line of difference between Sense Gratification and duties performed for Krsna. From your reply it seems that you are confused on the topic and are mixing up different subjects. You will need a lot of discussion with me face to face. I cannot use this e-mail platform. You know something about Varna Shankar Dosh it seems. And therein lies the contradiction to your reply. You admit to Varna Shankar Dosha but not admit Marriage as a duty to Krsna. In your view children can be produced only when a husband and wife want to engage in sex satisfaction process ! There is no other way children could be produced ? Our Shastras are full of examples where it is mentioned that Gruhastha Ashram is the best of all. Anyway I will keep this topic alive and we may discuss it when we meet or you may have a serious discussion with our ISKCON Acharya. One more thing you believe is that by dedicating one's life to his spiritual master in the service of Krsna he is liberated from Maya. Mind you Maya's scope is not so restricted, otherwise Saints like Vishwamitra would not have fallen down, Saints like Bharata would not have to take birth as Jada Bharata. It is an altogether different topic. You are under wrong impression about "freedom to women" and "protection to women". They are again two different things. Since long time men have started thinking it their almighty right to exploit women under the pretext that you have cited as example of Varna Shankar. My dear simply an ovum can not produce Varna Shankar Dosh, it requires SPERM . It is women who are raped and not a man. If men could control themselves no matter what a woman does she could not be raped without the desire of men. It is a vast topic again. I can say only this much that you need an expert to clarify your mind about these topics. Repeating a criminal deed several 100 times does not give it a legal sanctity. Same is the case about wrong notions which have been floated in our society ince about a 100 years I may say that Woman is a commodity - even Pandavas treated Draupadi like that. But it is wrong. Even in Rama's "Ramrajya" Mata Sita had to give "Agni Pariksha". Generations after man has remembered only this thing to dominate and exploit women. They have forgotten the treatment that was given by Rama to women. On a simple order of Mata Kaikeyee he had accepted Vanvaas of 14 years. What you have to say about it. Sita Mata Chose her husband, So did Mata Rukmini, only a few examples to be cited of freedom to women ! Hare krishna! If my Lord Krsna gives me order we will meet to discuss, or He knows He has innumerable ways of sorting things out.
        • Mahesh Kumar Gandhi , You said face to face???? Thank you but i know the facts of life.
          But there are other ways in having children to via adoption... I was just speaking my mind.
          Divorce& Marriage are seperate. But when spoken of duties (ie):marriage?? things happen btwn
          married couples tht are sometimes out of your hands.. i may be new to KC,and still learning
          about KC.. But i'd be greatful the next time not to be so graphic.. Thank you.
          hare krnsa
          PS I will continue my studies in KC
          the closest temple is in los angeles,california.
        • ''GOD PUNISHES SANYASIS......seems an interesting concoction!....however i would like to see your sastric quotes from OUR aRCHARYAS mahesh kumar ghandhi prabhu your tongue has got into the way of your mind POSSIBLY !Either way YOU SEEM A MIGHT CONFUSED .....OR SIMPLY QUITE WRONG!
          • yuga_avatar_das
            I don't like ur attitude..!!!! sastric quotes? You cannot stand in judement of others tht
            u don't know.. If u don't know me(the person) then don't judge... tht is not up to anyone
            to place judgement on others...
      • Hare Krishnha,

        Dandavat Pranam.

        All Glories to Srila Prabhupad and Gurudev.

        I fully agree with Swaroop Prabhu, as the ultimate goal of life is to Go Back Home, Back to Godhead.

        We have been given birth as Human Species which is a Karma Yoni, i.e. it is the only species which attracts the Laws of Karma. And Naturally we will have all the physical conditions which are common to almost all the species, but what we have more than other species namely (Aqautics = 9 Lacs, Plants = 20 Lacs, Insect & Reptiles = 11 lacs, Birds = 10 Lacs, Animals = 30 Lacs, balance is 4 lacs of Humans) is the Mind & the Intelligence. The Mind & intelligence are to be used in the best of the manner so that we do not take birth and get rid of this vicious cycle of Birth, Old age, Disease & Death.

        Our Scriptures (Includes the 4 Vedas, 18 mains Puranas, 108 Upanishadas, and other various sacred books) gives us full knowledge of the various procedures to attain this ultimate Goal of Life. None of these ever criticizes the path of Sanyaasa. In fact Sanyaasa Ashram is considered to be the best path for Bhakti Yoga - the highest among all the Yogas.

        Their is nothing wrong in getting into the Grihastha ashram as it is on of the stages in a Devotees life and will certainly help him or her if the focus is maintained on Krishna and they make him the centre point of their life.

        For example, We are 3 members in my family (me, my wife & my son), then I should consider my family to be a 4 member Family as Krishna too is the part of my family. We expect our family members to take care of us and offer the same in return to them. It is same with Krishna, he too wants that pure & un-alloyed love from his devotees rather than any materialistic & opulent offerings which is lacking in love.

        So married life is important only when we cannot attain the stage of controlling our Desires of Sense Gratifications which includes Eyes - Visuals, Ears - Hearing, Nose - Smelling, Tongue - Taste & Speaking - Singing / Chanting & Skin - Touch. Married life gives us all of these in ample amount the Mode of Passion & Ignorance but if we can direct our Sense Gratification in the path of Krishna Consciousness & utilize all our sense organs in relation to Krishna by ways of Eyes - taking Darshan of the Lord, Ears - by listening to the Transcendental Pastimes & Glories of the Lord, Nose - smelling the incense & flowers offered to Lord, Tongue - by honoring the Prasaadam of the Lord and by speaking Glories / Pastimes of the lord and by preaching the Holy names of the Lord and lastly Skin - to procreate and have children to make them Krishna Conscious and giving them a chance to Go back Home, Back to Godhead, then we transcend into the Mode of Goodness (Stavaguna) and that is the first step towards Devotional service to Krishna.

        So we should get into marriage only if one is sure that it will help him or her in their Devotional path and if it is not going to be so than we are doomed for eternity.

        • I'm not sure i totally agree with marriage. It depends on ones situation.Speaking from experiance from being married over 25yrs... I don't belive tht g-d will punish me for being divorced.
          If u read about His Divine Grace Prabhupada he retired from married life.It seems illogical for 2 ppl to stay married when it goes sour.And u try ur best to hold tht marriage together the best u can.
          Things happen... even though i'm new to the KC,, i hve no regrets by getting divorced. All my children are grown and my health isn't all tht great. I hve always tried to find other venues of spirituality.
          For a time i was involved in Metaphysics.. Now i'm trying to become a krishna devotee to the best of my ability... I read the gita and chant... So does tht make me a bad person in krnsa's eyes?
          Hare Krnsa
      • Wow... Great summary!
    • Hare Krishna Prabhu
      I had the same doubts that Cindrella, Krishna-definitely put us him that morning we make conscious decisions and give in favors to Krishna
      All Glories to Srila Prabhupada
      qi jay
  • Not compulsory, but recommended for most people. Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakur was a lifelong bramhachari, but his father Bhaktivinode Thakur showed that a family man with many children and responsibilities can also be a first class devotee.

    Is marriage a 'prescribed duty'? I am not sure. It is definitely a stage in the lives of most of the population, but great devotees such as Narada muni have preached in the Bhagavatam that one should avoid marriage if possible. I think it has to be decided seperately for each person, based on their strengths and level of detachment.
    • Hare Krishna! i completely agree with Rishabdeva Dasa because i see my mother performing all her duties towards her family and to this materialistic world and her devotion towards Lord Krishna and i am seeing this for last 25 years.
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