Now a days people are marrying another person on the basis of love. Arranged marriages are not so popular right now. Specially youths of our generation are mostly not feel motivated towards arranged marriages. Sometime they marry a person who is from another cast. I have a friend who married a person who is from other cast. His family accepted is easily.
On the other hand I have another friend who is in love with a girl from other religion. The girl promised him that he will convert himself to "shanatan/hindu" religion for the sake of love. My friend tried hard to convince his parents. But his parents didn't allowed it and also said that they will not allow in future too.
Watching all this things i am feeling occurred. I want to know that what our religion say about the inter cast and inter religion marriages? On one hand the parents are right. On the other hand the boy left the girl because of that incident. Now it can be said that the boy had cheated. Cheating is also a sin.
So, please will some make all this situation clear? and explain everything. Me and that friend we both are confused because one way or another the boy is doing sins. So, please tell something about the situation.
Hare Krishna!!
Replies
Hare Krsna Prabhuji,
PAMHO.
The purpose of both the marriages mentioned by you is sense gratification, whereas the actual purpose of a marriage is - husband and wife come together to help each other progress on the path of spirituality, to go back to Godhead. Once the purpose is defined and goal is in mind, whether the partner was any caste in the past doesnt matter.
Inter caste marriages are condemned in our scriptures. It is not encouraged.
For a higher purpose, a lower principle can be overruled. That is the reason I said if the goal is Krsna Consciousness, then ok. Marry across continents - we have so many devotee couples like that. Otherwise it is not advisable.
Haribol,
Your servant,
Radha Rasamayi DD
Hare Krsna
Our scriptures very strongly caution us regarding such marriages. For example Kamsa, Ravana were outcome of such marriage. The results are very bad.
But situation nowadays is much worse. Marriage has lost lot of meaning and as society turns more animistic, the situation will degrade further. Expect it !
Krsna consciousness is the only solution. If someone is trying to correct the situation of marriages in society without addressing the cause of degradation they will meet with little success. We have to take Krsna consciousness seriously and protect ourselves. Krsna is the only shelter.
The specific situations mentioned about love, cheat, sin, confusion etc are all a grand illusion. We have to surrender to Krsna and take decisions according to what is best for our own person's Krsna consciousness. Rather than getting confused over what to do now, we have to think long term about how we can surrender to Krsna & serve Krsna that is the only solution of all confusion. Until then we will be bewildered. We have to see which situation is more favorable for our Krsna consciousness. That is the only way.
Hare Krsna
Hmm .. Hare Krishna..
Sanatana dharma is not a religion. Santana means eternal. eternal dharma.
Srimad Bhagavatam 10.4.39 defines Sanatana Dharma as.."The foundation of all the demigods is Lord Viṣṇu, who lives and is worshiped wherever there are religious principles, traditional culture, the Vedas, cows, brāhmaṇas, austerities, and sacrifices with proper remuneration.''
Definition of Dharma= Principle of cosmic order.
Laws and rules laid by Lord Vishnu ( Krishna). Which are eternal for maintaining cosmic order.
In kaliyuga.. as stated in Srimad Bhagwatam..
In olden days.. There was Varnas and ashramas divided. . Brahmina , Kshetriya, Vaishya, Shudra ( Varnas). Brahmacharya (student), Grihastha (householder), Vanaprastha (retired) and Sannyasa (renunciate), are the ashramas.
In olden days Varnas were divided based on the work they undertook.
Brahmins duty was only to preach, teach and do devotional services in temples.
Kshetriyas were worriors
Vaishyas were traders, and Shudras were doing lower end jobs. Based on the job or work they undertook the people were classified.
Now it was a rule that Brahmina should marry only a brhamina etc. same case marriages were prefered
WHY?
for example.. brahmin marrried a shudra female .. now the shudra female wouldn't know any ritual and pooja vidhaana and she cannot help her husband in his job. similarly a brahmin woman cannot understand the duties of a ruler ( king) and would not be able to help or give advice to her husband as they are not trained in that work since childhood.
So for that sake marriage was always within the caste. They wanted to maintain a good pure caste so they preferred intra ( within the caste marriage).
Even though Karna was equally qualified in archery and could aim properly at the Draupadi's swayamvar. He couldnt win her hand for he was labelled suta putra. He cannot marry a Kshetriya princess.
But now a days.... all classes people are taking up different jobs.. A shudra is becoming a doctor or engineer or pilot.
Brahmin working under a Shudra these days. In Kaliyuga the classification based on job ( work) they do is not existing anymore.
What classification existing is....only classification based on money, beauty, sexual expertise. Marriages is also becoming outdated. shamelessly people are entering into Live -in relationships ..based on how expert one is at sex it is becoming the deciding factor whether they can continue with them to live together or not. Same as written in Srimad bhagwatam it is happening right now.
SB 12.2.3 — Men and women will live together merely because of superficial attraction, and success in business will depend on deceit. Womanliness and manliness will be judged according to one’s expertise in sex, and a man will be known as a brāhmaṇa just by his wearing a thread.
Few years back like 50 yrs back.. in black and white days they used to say love ..attraction ( based on external appearance).. ..now a days they say shamelessly I lust her. She /he is good in bed.
This is the criteria for marriage.
There is no Varna existing now a days..almost gone.
coming to ashrama .. brahmacharya vrat is done by those entering teens esp. they used to be sent to gurukul for studies and were strictly kept away from any sort of lusty desires or thoughts until they enter ghrishata stage.
But now a days we see.. college goers even teens doing love affairs. and adulterous affairs existing in vanaprastha age also.
There is no ashrama ( age) restrictions also followed these days.. If a person having money.. he can undergo Botox and cosmetic surgeries , Liposuction and look younger and date woman. Widow re- marriages etc also have cropped in
No Varna and No ashrama dharma is followed any more.
Ya., parents and elders who know the outcome of these inter caste marriage are apprehensive and want to find suitable intra ( within the caste) marriage for their children.
The outcome is as expected.. a shudra cannot adjust with a brahmin ( somewhere there will be some clashes) . they will have understanding to some extent. But after some small tiffs.. slowly the basic idea that they are some different class will come up. and then there will unstable marriages.. divorces. ...children born will have confusion they will so many issues.
That is why we see many divorces over last few decade there is a great rise in numbers.
Very rarely we find compatible couple who live committed to each other till the end.
The children born from these couples are confused which tradition they are going to follow. First of all parents are only not clear.
Inter faith is one big blunder marriage only. Very rarely one can adjust into another religion and follow their religious rules and regulations upto the mark. In this case also the suffers are only the children.
Children are confused souls.
Recently here i met a person he is 72 yrs old.. but he is still confused what is his religion is.. His father is a chirstian and mother is a Hindu. this person till now didn't understand what is his faith.. He comes to this site and asks... I am here to clear my doubts. I went to all religions and everywhere I couldn't find any faith that i could fix on. I am confused. I am now trying Buddhism it seems best as there is not God in it. We tried out level best to convince him about Krishna being Supreme Godhead. He is unable to understand at this age also.
Now such people keep on arguing with all and spread atheistic religion.
This a outcome of inter faith marriage.. The outcome is athesim. disbelief in everything and questioning even the existence of God.
Now how do you expect such children ( divorced parents) and athestic belief can get any liberation ever. They cannot understand anything they are confused souls. They end up in repeated cycles of birth and deaths.
These children cannot make a great Nation. Neither they can help themselves nor they can help others in the society devloping KC among others.
Okay if at all there is a successful marriage by God's grace.. and hope they get KC then only there maybe some good outcome.
Basically speaking we are now entering a stage of Kaliyuga 25 yrs down we wont find this caste and faith etc. there would be no longer any caste system left. religions will be based only on outer appearance, clothes ( robes) and symbols they carry. as per Srimad Bhagwatam ghor kaliyug is yet to come.
Parents who know all these outcomes want to just avert this situation as possible.. But youth and the raising hormones can never understand what is the real cause behind all this idea.
Even Parents are also confused they are just worrying for their social status in the society name, fame and personal interest only not thinking exactly for the welfare of humanity. Just want their children to follow their order and maintain their social status.
Even youth is confused.. they are getting attracted to opposite sex only but not thinking about humanity in general
Basically both parents and the youth both are Selfish.
Hare Krishna.
Humble Obeisance!
You have asked a nice question.Its a very sensitive topic.
Hinduism is an oldest religion in the world. Its Sanatan (a religion which is created by Lord Himself ). First of all one should remain in the same religion for the whole life in which he took birth and should never go for other religion. In this world nothing is permanent. one should try to love God which should be the real purpose of life along with material goals.
He or she will get a good life partner with the God will by patience and good faith in lord.
In fact no pure love exist in the world which is now have limited to the beauty attraction and sense gratification, May be it exist but very rare, other wise that is physical attraction of male and female to one another. If we talk about humanism. Its above from all religion. In my opinion if we see through humanism all humans are same soul/spirit parcel of lord there is no difference and one can marry a woman and a woman can marry a man but only when if religion is not consider except humanism. Beside it, if he or she really loves him/her but the fact is society will not accept it. It needs the sacrifices of both life partners for one another and compromise for the whole life.
Conclusion: One should be self controlled and should marry a man or woman of same religion. A man and women both should live in their limits. Other wise that give rise to sins and nothing. In universities and colleges many kind of persons are there, different gender different cast religion, till friendship its ok but being a life partner you will face the religious problem. You will not face this problem if you will consider your boundaries and limits. Because every relation has its boundaries and limits. Girls boys friendship is a common fashion and trend, that's ok but one should keep in mind woman are weaker than man, they needs protection. in the form of father, brother, a good friend and a husband. So know your limits don't let that situation arise of intercast marriage. Be patience, don't forget God has something special for you.
Jay Shree Krsna
I am a fallen Soul,I have just given my opinion. Any offence be forgiven. Jay Jay Shree Radhay Sham.