Receive my respect!
I don't know how active this site is, how much it isn't, but I'll try to ask a question. My name is Alek and I live in Sarajevo. I am 21 years old and I have been interested in spirituality since I was a child, I was especially interested in Sanathan Dharma since childhood, as well as cultures such as Lamaism, Egyptianism, Paganism, etc. Many years ago I started to worship Lord Shiva and Mother Mahakali, although I did not have any great knowledge, I worshiped them in the way my friends from India explained to me. I had no big wishes except for love, knowledge and protection, because as a young man I went through many difficulties in my childhood. That path led me to Krishna and to the path of Master Srila Prabupada.
- Although I still have material attachments, I stopped eating meat, I haven't drunk alcohol for 4 years, I don't have sexual relations or the desire for them, my only major vice is cigarettes, but I'm trying to reduce that too, although unsuccessfully. But it doesn't matter, I tried as hard as I could in the Iskcon community, but I didn't get certain knowledge, and spiritual teachers don't come here, at least not those who are ready to accept a student. I have no money to travel, and once one falls in love with Sri Krishna, he cannot live without him. I started getting ugly comments in Isckon from some devotees on account of my past, because I opened up to some, and on account of my health problems. I couldn't take it anymore and when a Swami from Croatia was visiting, I said everything that was on my heart in front of everyone and I never returned to the temple. I was angry and hurt and I was even kind of angry with Srila Prabupad, and I feel guilty about that now. The false ego worked in me and I fell. In the meantime, I found another Vaishnava sampradaya where I found friends and people who appreciate me as I am. The teacher is really wonderful, I learned the art of Kriya yoga, doing puja and everything was wonderful until I got restrictions due to my health condition and the medications I have to take. Since then, I haven't made any progress, nor do I hear from people from that sampradaya that much anymore. I simply lost my will, and despite the fact that I appreciate those people and the teacher, I feel that this is not the right path. I started reading Srimad Bhagavatam now and again my feeling for Srila Prabupada came back and I realized how wrong I was. People make mistakes, but I sincerely repent. I have my Radha and Krishna deities at home which I got from another sampradaya but I don't know how to do the puja properly. I don't know how to serve and who can help me. I love them and I am grateful to them for reaching me and I will be eternally grateful. They are so close to me, yet so far...I fell in love with Iskcon again and the feelings from before came back to me. I feel that this is my path, and I don't have the heart to leave a teacher from another sampradaya, I don't think I will ever leave him, he is my friend and yoga teacher, but I have a special connection with Srila Prabupada. I don't know if I can return to the temple here, and even if I did, I don't know what I would achieve because I don't have the strength to go through the insults, whatever they may be. I am too weak, and I know very well what karma is and the punishment for sins from the past and this life, but for me the only goal is Krishna, nothing else.
- If anyone reads this, please kindly give me some advice, talk, anything, I need help because I don't know where I am or what to do, or how to worship the deities from home. If someone can give me advice on how to serve, I will be grateful and how to progress on the spiritual path. Thanks again for taking the time to read this little article. In any case, thank you for your welcome to this community and may Krishna bless you with spiritual treasures and protect you from misery under the shelter of His lotus feet.
Best regards,
Your servant,
Alek.
Replies
Hey Alek, Hare Krsna, if you just need a friend contact me direct, happy to talk. I live in the UK..All the best for now .Nick
Hare KRsna dear Alek prabhu,
Please accept my humble obeisances.
Welcome back to the family of Srila Prabhupada. Yes, the path of spirituality can be daunting, esp in a foreign land, without any association of like minded people.
What you can do - I am now mentioning the A B C D of devotion. See how much is feasible for you and do. No force and no guilt for not being able to do whatever I am mentioning here.
A - Association. Like they say, we are known by the company we keep. Therefore, who we associate with has a strong bearing on our personality. It would be great if you could physically associate with devotees. You will also feel the connect and they will be there to help you. Not forcing, but if its possible, you may consider going back to the local ISKCON temple. Need not go immediately also. Maybe gradually you could do.
Other option is to associate online. Please stay connected to this website and through this, to people like me. Feel free to ask anything you want and different devotees will give answers based their knowledge, experience and wisdom. You could choose which one to follow and proceed like that.
B - books. This you are already doing - read books of Srila Prabhupada. We can Bhagavad Gita As It Is as graduation, Srmad Bhagawatam as post graduation and Chaitanya Charitamrta as PhD. There are a lot of other, smaller books also by Srila Prabhupada. You could access them online at www.vedabase.com and read for free.
C - Chanting - please try to chant minimum number of committed rounds daily. Since you came down from 10 rounds to 1, maybe try to increase to 4 rounds daily. Then gradually, as and when you are comfortable, increase 2 rounds at a time. There are no rules to chanting - whether sitting, standing, walking - one can chant. Any time of day or night, indoors or outdoors, any situation, one can chant. Please chant your committed rounds daily and then only retire for the night.
D - diet - Eat only what has been offered to Krsna. Ideally vegetarian food without onion and garlic, no smoking, no drinking, no intoxication of any kind. How to offer - simply put the cooked food/ fruits/ dry fruits on a plate and place in front of your deities. Request them mentally - please have. It is as simple as that. Since you know the mahamantra, you could say that also. If you know Srila Prabhupada pranam mantra, you could say that before saying maha mantra. That is all.
Regarding how to do deity worship, I will mention in my next post. Slightly busy now.
Welcome once again.
Best of luck prabhu.
Your servant,
Radha Rasamayi DD
Alek, you sound like a pretty emotional person but spiritual emotions need a solid basis in the knowledge of philosophy, otherwise one can be mislead. So please read and study BG and SB, listen to lectures and get in touch with devotees online. Maybe later you could move closer to some devotee community.
This website should help you with your puja - https://www.deityworship.com/
All the best!
Hari Hari
ys J.
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Hare Krishna, thank you soo much for beautiful advice. I will continue read Bhagavad Geeta, now Im on first chapter of Shrimad Bhagavatam, and I feel wonderfull reading This. As for meat, I have no intention of eating meat again, unless, God forbid, my life is in danger and I have to.I care about Krishna more than myself and I hope it will stay that way
🙏😊
Hari Hari
I have had many pets, currently I have a cat Orion, and I felt even as a child that every being, even a goldfish, is a special soul.