how to gain husband love, care and respect

hare krishna....all glories to srila prabhupada and lord shri krishna !!!i m.married housewife and have two lords grace i have everything but still not happy...1. first my husband....he is good but still i feel he never cares for me...our thinking dont match at all...he never respect my emotions and feelings....he is like he is always right and i m wrong....he can never to do anything wrong...whenever i cook for him...he never cooking....never appreciates me if i do something to gain his can i know whether he really loves me...2. since i have 2 small kids at home....i have never be able to do proper japa...whole day i get tired by running towards them...whenever i do japa...i feel to overcome this and do sincere japa...kindly show me some way to win over my husbands love and do sincere japa.

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  • Hare Krishna Mataji!

    Please Accept My Humble Obeisances.

    Request you to kindly go through my article on Speaking Tree. This is the link:

    Hope it addresses all your doubts and guides you towards leading a happy, blissful family life.

    Your Servant,

    Mathura Vasi Devi Dasi.

  • hare krishna ....first of all ,u r so lucky tat krishna blessed u with a family.he is the jagnataka sutradari..making u to climb the ladder of desires and pulling u down by greif and sorrows...its prakruti dharma and niyama...we are just puppets in his hands. ur birth and death are the only truth rest all is a natak(a play on the stage of life). first of all u build a charector to absorb  r say acquire  only the positiveness in others... dont think about der negativity . if he is not caring u it means he loves u..but thing is that we are humans we have egos and the superiority and inferiority complex in their mind about their opposite gender.. so , we being the devotee of krishna..following his principles we should see that we  maintain the relationship..

    before krishna husband and wife both are equal. elders say that always wife should to think her husband as lord vishnu and husband should think her as mahalakshmi..

    follow these rules to have peace at home:

    1. never ever step into kicthen without taking bath.

    2.first light the lamp in ur puja room and then pray to the fire god  that what ever u cook should give higher taste .

    3.never comb ur hair after lighting the lamp in the evening.

    4.when ever he comes from outside u give him glass of water.

    5.never sleep in the day time,it is not gud for ur health ,ur family and ur home.

    6.see that ur home is clean .moop and sweap everyday,and don keep old rusted worned ot,broken thing in ur home .

    who ever sleep till the sun rises and who sleeps at the evening time  from (5pm-8pm) in their houses lakshmi wont enter. lakshmi means not only money but also, studies,health,crop,children,moksh(salvation),love and affection,victory  are also to have her u have to follow those rules what i said.

    if u r doin all these it well and good... if not please try to..

    i said all these because love and affection starts at the dinning table only... while cooking thing of krishna and cook... im sure ur husband  will relish  completely with joy.

    u said he wont respect ur feeling and emotions... look a mother can give a birth to a baby but she cant give birth to his or her attitude.... 

    there is only pariharam for ur problem u recite MADURASHTAKAM daily in the morning,its just 8 stanzas ,and in the evening  recite VISHNUSAHASRANAMAM, u will get these book material in internet or in book stalls . and im damm sure ur husband will care for u..and u get ur respect...

     u r like yashoda maa u r having two kids they are only ur krishna balaram .... u concentrate  on them... krishna lies there itself....

    and for suppose u cant recite those  mantras daily ,there is brahmaastram to all ur sorrows and that is SRI SATHYANARAYAN VRATH PUJA ,generally these poojs will be done done before or after any gud ocassion in the house but it is said and belived that this pooja can be on any day irrepective of  days.. u can do it on aamavasya , grahan  or any days and i suggest u to perform this puja in the evening on pournima  day .doing this pooja gives u happiness in ur lifes it is highest of all vrathas.... it cures all sought of  problems   in ur home,or in u or in any one ,physically and mentally. the pooja is actually a lenghty procedure vrath katha god has said that u can do the pooja as per ur comfort... and me and my family do this every pournima so im suggesting u.... this  sathyanarayan puja is ashtaishwarya siddhidayaka vrath puja .

     the procedure is quite simple:

    on the day of pournima get up early in the morning ,do all ur regular works and light the lamp in ur puja mandir and make ur mind  and do sankalp to lord sathyanarayan swami that u will do his puja in the evening.

    always pujas done in the evening time have more result than anything because its the time when cows come back to home that is called goduli lagnam/kalam, time for godess lakshmi devi.

    in the evenig may be by six u start ur puja ,for that u need a photo of sri sathynarayan swami ,flowers,specially tulasi(without tulasi the puja is of no use),coconut,deep,dhoop, aarti thali and for bhog u have prepare kesari bath(the preparation is quite simple,take sooji rava pour ghee AND SUGERto measurable qnty., to wat extent u have taken rava to that see and put ghee to that and add dry fruits if needed,IT SHOULD NOT BE COOKED ON FIRE ).

    take bath.. and keep on chantin hare krishna mantra and  prepare the bhog and keep aside,to the photo offer flowers and offers fruits and tulasi especially... offer bhog and chant hare krshna mantra if u can recite satyanarayan ashtotara shatanamavali and offer coconut do aarti after aarti u must take prasadam and den give the prasadm to family and neighbours tooo... do this regularly im sure  u will have good days any queries call me9740052646  

    • thanks for giving pariharam for my issues....the points which you told...i do follow few of them...not all... from onwards will follow....also i know madhurashtakam...will learn vishnushashranaam too and recite both daily...thank you so much for your feedback and time

      haribol !
  • yep shalini mataji....Will do chanting as much as possible...thanks !
  • E-Counselor

    Hare Krsna Mataji,


    What you should aim for is Krsna's love, not your husband's love. What will happen even if you do get your husband's love? It will be maximum for this birth - then what? Next birth, another life, another husband, another struggle. There will always be some struggle in everyone's life - either husband, or mother in law, or father in law, or sister in law or even parents, brothers or money problem or job stability problem. Best is to surrender to Krsna and aspire for His love. This love will last lifetimes and is higher than anything else.

    Regarding japa, please chant. There is no other substitute. If you chant, your children will also chant. Get for them small beads, of 27 beads and make them also chant. If you tell them to, naturally they wont. But if you chant in front of them, they will automatically chant. There are a lot of devotees who have small children mataji. We always have time for what is important to us na. If you make Krsna and His name important to you, everything else will follow.

    It is a good suggestion that you offer food to Krsna before giving to your family. Do not expect miracles overnight, today you offered, so today onwards, there shuold be no bad behaviour on the part of the husband. It doesnt work that way.

    My take on the whole thing would be - thank you Krsna for giving me such a husband who doesnt love me. I realise that the only one who truly loves me and is with me through lifetimes is You. You love me and accept me with all my faults, dear lord.  If You had given me a good husband, I would have got so involved with husband and kids that I would not have thought about You at all. You are making me realise the futility of running behind material relationships, the only true relationship is with You. So please help me in re establishing my relationship with You. Please allow me to chant Your name.


    Your servant,


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    • hare krishna!
      thanks ashwin..will follow your advice ..
      even my sister said the same...cook for krishna and give it to my husband like problem is i m not able to do it...even while cooking i think of all the ill-treatments...problem is with me only...i have not been able to surrender krishna fully...thats why so much misery and sadness is in my life....
This reply was deleted.