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Sudhama ji and all other people from Vrindavan had seen lord and all his leelas. They were present there physically and seen everything that the lord did. It is very natural for them to feel the true love for the lord. However people like us have only read about the lord and his pastimes in scriptures. We only have the information via books and I guess none of us have ever seen the lord except a very few people. So how can we get the same level of love for the lord from inside? I know it will be really difficult for all of us because most of us have neither experienced the lord nor seen him. But we can try to the best of our abilities. How can we generate the true love feeling for the lord from inside us as I believe lord has given us everything and everything is already present inside us but we just need to realise it! If once we feel the love for the lord from inside us, then for sure lord will notice us and everything in life will be taken care of. How can one truly love the lord without any selfish motive of ours? Most of the people worship lord with some motive in their minds. How can we stop worshipping like that? If we don't have any selfish motive only then we can love the lord completely.
Your question has actually a lot of questions within.
I'll try to answer some.
Can we become like Sudhama?
Sudhama is a Nitya Sidha, meaning eternally liberated soul. He never had anything but uncondition love and total surrender towards Krishna (In sakya bhava, an intimate relationship as a friend)
We on the other hand are Nitya Bhadha, meaning eternally bound. Now we too can get liberation and can become sadhana Sidha, meaning, by engaging in intense devotional service, we can attain liberation. We can never become like Sudhama, who is eternally, and by nature, a Pure devotee, Shudha Bhakta.
The supreme occupation [dharma] for all humanity is that by which men can attain to loving devotional service unto the transcendent Lord. Such devotional service must be unmotivated and uninterrupted to completely satisfy the self(meaning, our Atma)
Most of the people worship lord with some motive in their minds. How can we stop worshipping like that?
A person who has broader intelligence, whether he be full of all material desire, without any material desire, or desiring liberation, must by all means worship the supreme whole, the Personality of Godhead.
-By engaging oneself intensely in Bhakti yoga
So, what is Bhakti?
The Nārada-pañcarātra also says:
“One should be free from all material designations and cleansed of all material contamination. He should be restored to his pure identity, in which he engages his senses in the service of the proprietor of the senses. That is called devotional service.”
Here is another definition for Bhakti, also from Narada pancaratra:
bhaktir ity ucyate bhishmaprahladoddhava- naradaih
"When one develops an unflinching sense of ownership or possessiveness in relation to Lord Vishnu, or, in other words, when one thinks Vishnu and no one else to be the only object of love, such an awakening is called bhakti (devotion) by exalted persons like Bhishma, Prhalada, Uddhava, and Narada."*
So, develop attachment only to Krishna/Vishnu and no one else.
So how do we please the Lord? By doing amala bhakti. If you are not doing pure bhakti. It is just a show!!
My dear friends, O sons of the demons, you cannot please the Supreme Personality of Godhead by becoming perfect brāhmaṇas, demigods or great saints or by becoming perfectly good in etiquette or vast learning. None of these qualifications can awaken the pleasure of the Lord. Nor by charity, austerity, sacrifice, cleanliness or vows can one satisfy the Lord. The Lord is pleased only if one has unflinching, unalloyed devotion to Him. Without sincere devotional service, everything is simply a show.
Therefore chant Shudha Naama.
Shudha Naama, is Pure chanting. When one does not commit the 10 offenses, called Namaparadh, and chants the Names of the Lord, one is said to be chanting purely.
Such chanting/Japa/Sankirtana will lead to Bhava bhakti and Prema bhakti
Only by purely chanting, we can go back to Godhead. Lord says, otherwise it is just a show!!
Hare krishna prabhuji,
I would like to thank you for the wonderful reply. It really helped me a lot and answered a lot of my doubts.
Jai Gaura Hari
Hare Krsna Prabhuji,
The one answer to all your questions is - Chant Hare Krsna mahamantra very nicely and attentively. All of these will manifest.
To answer individually:
Vrindavan vasis are nitya siddha jivas, as already mentioned. We (jivatma) are nitya baddha. We can become sadhana siddha or kripa siddha devotees. What i know is that once we become purified devotees, not only the Vrindavan pastimes are revealed to us, we can also be part of the pastimes. For that, one has to be a maha bhagawata, of course. These leelas are nitya leelas - they are going on now also, we are unable to see because of our conditioning. Acharyas have written so many books on these pastimes, because they have access to these leelas.
How to become a mahabhagawata? Again we come back to basics, chanting, prasadam, association, knowledge of scriptures.
None of us have ever seen the lord except a very few - we all have experienced some rasa - otherwise it would not be possible for us to continue. Lord is among us, He dances on our tongue when we chant the mahamantra, He hears every conversation we have, only we are too conditioned to even believe it. As and when we become purified, we will be able to experience the lord and His mercies in our day to day activities.
To generate that true love for God, we need 3 things:
1) dust of lotus feet of pure devotee
2) mercy of pure devotee
3) rendering service to the lord and His devotees.
We should not distinguish between GBC and ABC. We should respect each and every Vaishnava.
I was hearing in a lecture recently that one prabhuji was facing difficulty in chanting. He went to the temple and decided to render menial service. He cleaned the dirty plates of devotees after sunday feast and the pots and pans used for cooking. In the next 15 days, he was relishing chanting like never before. Others saw him and got inspired to render menial service.
Please remember this world is inverted tree - urdhva mulam adha sakham ...What is considered menial in material world is exalted in spiritual world. Material world, do we aspire to become servant of anyone? Whereas in spiritual world, to be able to call ourselves servant of Srila Prabhupada and his movement is an honour and something so coveted, one has to work for it. Same way, menial service can open the doors to spiritual progress.
If we are able to do this much, the rest of the questions will be automatically answered.
Radha Rasamayi DD
Hare Krishna Radha Mataji,
Thank you very much for guiding me in the correct direction by giving such wonderful replies. The replies really teach me a lot about life and devotion and I am sure that they will help a new devotee like me to learn a lot about Krishna Consciousness. Kindly keep guiding younger devotees like us so that we can also learn and grow in life.
Hare Krishna Harshit Prabhu ,Please accept My Humble Obeciences
As shravan Prabu already mention about Nitya siddhas & Nitya baddhas , we fall into the category Of nitya baddhas
Idd like to add to it,
Without the mercy of Nityananda, it is not possible to attain the highest goal, pure love (prema).
“The love for Krishna in the mood of the gopis which is described in the Bhagavata is attained in the world through Nityananda.”
Caitanya Bhagavata, 3.5.303
In Krishna-lila, Nityananda Prabhu is Sri Balarama.
Sri Balarama is assisting Sri Krishna in His enjoyment as Master of Lilas.
Everything in the spiritual world which assists in or enhances Krishna´s lila is an expansion of Sri Balarama.
Krishna Das Kaviraja Goswami says:
Nityananda is Balarama, Krishna´s elder brother. Just as Sri Krishna of Vrindavana appeared as Sri Caitanya of Navadvipa, Balarama of Vrindavana appeared as Nityananda of Navadvipa.“
Sri Krishna is the Supreme Person, Bhagavan Himself and Sri Balarama is His first manifestation in a different body to assist Krishna in His lila.
Sri Krishna is Sevya, the One who is served. Balarama is Sevaka, the One who serves.
So Nityananda is the perfect servant, in all respects.
Just as Balarama serves Krishna in numerous ways, Nityananda serves Sri Caitanya.
Chanting Nityananda name/Mantra Before Chanting Hare krishna maha mantra Nullifies the 10 Offences towards the Holy Name
sri-krsna-premanama parama-sukhamayah ko ’py achintyah padartho
yad gandhat sajjanaugha nigama-bahumatam moksam apy aksipanti
kaivalyaisvarya-seva-prada-gana iti yasyangatah prema-datuh
sri-nityananda-chandram bhaja bhaja satatam gaura-krsna-pradam tam 
(5) My dear heart, please eternally worship that gracious giver of Gaura Krishna—Sri Nityanandachandra. It is He who bestows upon us pure unalloyed divine love for the Supreme Lord Sri Krishna (Sri Krishna-prema), composed of the most supreme and intense ecstasy. The love that He distributes carries an inconceivable import—it is of such ecstasy that the sadhus who may experience only a hint of its fragrance, hatefully cast away all thought of liberation in the ‘One’ as propounded in the Vedas. Furthermore, His Avatars, who bestow the divine love of service in the transcendental majesty of Vaikuntha, are but expansions of His expansion.
praptajno gaura-chandrad akhila-jana-ganoddhara-nama-pradane
yah prapya dvau surapau kali-kalusa-hatau bhratarau brahma-daityau
gadha-prema prakasaih krta-rudhira-vapus chapi tav ujjahara
sri-nityananda-chandram bhaja bhaja satatam gaura-krsna-pradam tam 
(8) My heart, please constantly give thyself to the divine service of that gracious bestower of Gaura Krishna, Sri Nityanandachandra! It was He who received the divine instruction from Gaurachandra to deliver all souls by bestowing divine love through the Holy Name. Showing the extremity of His divine love, He delivered those two fallen wine-drinking brahmans (Jagai and Madhai) ruined by the degraded inauspicious nature of Kali-yuga even after they had attacked Him and blood was oozing from His body.
saksad gauro gananam sirasi yad avadhutasya kaupina-khandam
samdhartun chadidesasava-yavana-vadhu-sprsta-drsto ’pi vandyah
brahmadyanam apiti prabhu-parihrta-kanam api svesta-pitah
sri-nityananda-chandram bhaja bhaja satatam gaura-krsna-pradam tam 
(9) Please worship eternally, dear heart, that gracious bestower of Gaura Krishna, Sri Nityanandachandra. Sri Gauranga Mahaprabhu ordered all His beloved followers to accept with worshipful reverence any small piece of the kaupin (loincloth) of Nityananda Prabhu, the topmost of personalities above all social norms and strictures (avadhut). Even if He is seen to touch an immoral drunken woman or yavani, He is nonetheless worshippable by all the gods headed by Brahma. And He is the beloved leader among those exalted devotees who lovingly captivate the heart of Sri Chaitanyadev.
gaure sraddham drdham bho prabhu-parikara-samrat prayachchhadhame ’smin
ullanghyanghrim hi yasyakhila-bhajana-katha svapnavach chaiva mithya
sri-nityananda-chandram patita-sarana-dam gaura-dam tam bhaje ’ham 
(12) Dear Lord, O Nityananda Prabhu, emperor of the associates of Sriman Mahaprabhu! Graciously grant this fallen soul firm and faithful devotion for Sri Gauranga, the supreme embodiment of the taste of the sweet nectar of the ecstasy of Sri Sri Radha-Krishna’s Pastimes. By neglecting the lotus feet of Nityananda Prabhu all sadhana or bhajan—spiritual practices, services, or worship—become an illusion, just like a dream. I worship and adore with all my heart that gracious giver of Sri Gaura, the benevolent bestower of His shelter to the fallen souls—Sri Nityanandachandra.
we should see Nityananda prabhu atleast on the same lvl or higher than Chaitanya mahaprabhu.
He goes door to door to give krishna naam & gives krishna prem to all
Hare krishna Bhanu prabhuji,
I must say this reply was a great addition and i can see the effort put by you in writing such a beautiful answer. This reply of yours has truly helped me a lot. Thank you for putting in the time and effort to write this answer. I really appreciate it. Kindly keep guiding me in the right direction.
"Sudhama ji and all other people from Vrindavan had seen lord and all his leelas. They were present there physically and seen everything that the lord did. It is very natural for them to feel the true love for the lord."
Duryodhana and Shakuni were also moving close by to Lord. They also could see HIM in real. BUT WHY DIDN't they develop love???
If seeing and being physical presence was only required to feel the natural love of God what about People like Surdas?? who was blind since birth????
What about.. Ras Khan, Meerabai, Dhanna Jatt, Karma bai, Narsi Mehta, Tukaram.. and so many others... contemplated on lord's form mentally and could develop love for Lord.... they never were eternal associates of lord.
You will say they are gifted.. they got mercy of Lord what about us??
Nothing happens as magic ...It all happens as a result of previous Sukriti done...When their sins gets burned off by the Sadhana, or Sukriti, or by Mercy of Vaishnavas, Guru's Mercy or by Lord Mercy or Nityananda prabhu's mercy or Offenseless chanting or by Radharani's mercy. Either Sadhana siddhi or Kripa siddhi something must have led them to experience this stage.
Dhruva Maharaj didn't even know how lord looks like until Narad muni gave him the full description of Lord to meditate upon.
Brahma ji also didn't know what to meditate upon when he came out of lotus flower. He didn't understand .. then He meditated to realize Lord in the region of heart.
We atleast have some deities to meditate upon. And these deities are made in accordance to the scriptural description of Lord.
Meerabai was told by her mother this deity of Muralidhar is ur pati play with it when she was a kid. She really believed in the words.
Belief is what that matters.
Dhanna Jaatt believed in the words of the Pandit ji who just gave him a grinding stone and said this is ur Thakur ji pray to it and don't eat food before offering to it. Dhanna Jatt really believed in the Stone and the Stone reciprocated to him.
Its all previous lives sukriti and devotional service that is carried forward. When all the bad and good karma get neutralized u become akarmi then Lord enters your heart when ur heart is cleansed of all sins and material attachements no desires left for material things .. .. it is the right time. Till then we keep on doing Sadhana.. chanting, devotion activities and all so that one day in some life time our Sadhana will come to the siddha stage. Sadhana Siddhi can happen.
SOME GREAT PERSON SAID " DESERVE AND DESIRE".>> How true it is. Let us first make ourself deserving ( with perfecting our sadhana) and then let us desire.
Natural love also doesn't happen simply.... Everything is and happening since many many life times. cleansing of your...( Heart) antahkaran is taking place... since many life times.
How can one truly love the lord without any selfish motive of ours?
when you realize that Lord is present in all and when you lose this body conscious, when you become soul conscious. When you stop identifying with all the things around you and identity self with Supreme consciousness. Identifying oneself as part and parcel of the Supreme Lord.. That day you will have no selfish motive. You will see lord in all beings.. You can never hurt anyone..!!!!!! not even an insect or animal also. When you see Lord in all beings you cannot think of hurting any being at all you will lose ur identity pertaining to this body alone.. You become one with the Supreme lord meaning you become one with the universe.
Srimathi Radha rani and other gopi's were in lost in love and seperation...when Sri Krishna had left Brindavan. They completely lost themselves though they were present bodily in Brindavan their minds were fixed on Lord. They had no selfish interest in them. They lost identifying with the body. They become one with the nature. Gopis' were talking with brids , trees, river, leaves, bees... even sand particles .. When you lose ur identity.. You have nothing left no selfish interest or motive. This stage is sheer madness.. in material worldly terms.
HEHEHEHE... we are striving to become mad. Some people go mad lose identity. psychiatrist says he lost his mind. Losing mind to the Supreme Lord is surrender in love. We love to be surrender to other in love. That is called Falling in love. Fall is surrender. Falling is truly fall of the ego the "I" our identity. Until you have "I' u have selfish motive. Lose "I" you have only our or Your left.
I am yours..All is ours... When this happens within you.. then you have no selfishness.. How can you then hurt others when you find urself and the other parts of the supreme lord. Can you now cut and eat a part of lord???? You will have no selfish taste buds left now. A chicken also belongs to lord a fish also and you also.. How can you cut and eat fish and chicken to eat it now??? They belong to part of Supreme Lord too. Neither you can hurt anyone with words or deeds becoz all is part and parcel of the Supreme Lord.
If you know all are part and parcel of lord ......you become selfless. Not knowing by mere words.. It should really come from within ur heart... that compassion.
Hare krishna Gayatri ji,
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