Hare Krishna,
Why devotees married and have children?
Thank you
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Hare Krishna,
Why devotees married and have children?
Thank you
You need to be a member of ISKCON Desire Tree | IDT to add comments!
Replies
Bg 7.11
kāma-rāga-vivarjitam
dharmāviruddho bhūteṣu
kāmo ’smi bharatarṣabha
The strong man’s strength should be applied to protect the weak, not for personal aggression. Similarly, sex life, according to religious principles (dharma), should be for the propagation of children, not otherwise. The responsibility of parents is then to make their offspring Kṛṣṇa conscious.
Hare Krishna!
Please Accept My Humble Obeisances.
Having a very clear understanding about the sacred institution of marriage or entering into ‘grihastha ashrama’ is extremely pivotal because it gives birth to, nourishes, sustains and preserves all the four ashramas i.e. brahmacarya (student), grihasta (householder), vanaprastha (retired) and sannyasa (renounced). By serving other ashramas, the grihastha ashrama flowers, prospers and becomes nourished in the spiritual culture of Vedic civilization. It is through the grihastha ashrama that the Vedic and spiritual culture is best manifested to the society.
The purpose of marriage is to provide an opportunity for both the spouses and all the members in the family to properly support one another to peacefully practice and grow in their Krishna Consciousness. In Vedic scriptures, the institution of marriage is referred to as an "ashram" or a sacred place of purification. Marriage provides a perfect opportunity for this, as it involves rising above one's own personal attachments/issues and serving the other members of the family with devotion and detachment. It is designed to help devotees grow and become more pure in their Krsna Consciousness. Thus, marriage, if properly approached, is an amazing opportunity offered to the conditioned soul to shed its false ego, become more advanced in Krsna Consciousness and cultivate devotional qualities like patience, determination, chastity, faith etc. The key to making this happen is a strong relationship of service and inquiry with a bonafide spiritual master, as well as those who closely guide one's spiritual life.
Bhaktivinoda Thakur states that: “Marriage with a view to peaceful and virtuous life and with a view to procreate servants of the Lord is a good institution for a Vaisnava. Spiritual cultivation is the main object of life. Do everything that helps it and abstain from everything that thwarts the cultivation of the spirit”.
His Holiness Jaypataka Maharaj in one of his lectures explains that, “Krishna will be very pleased, if you follow your vows for Him. We hope that people will take it very seriously, when they make this marriage vows, "That's what I am doing for Krishna." There is a pastime in Padma-purana were someone was following their marriage vows and Krishna came and took them all Back to Godhead, because they followed for Krishna”.
For a grihastha devotee it does not matter whether he has a son or a daughter or no children at all. Why is it so? Because a devotee understands that the will of the providence is supreme and one must be satisfied with that. A devotee is aware that he is not destined to travel in this material world after his death. His aspiration is to go back home back to Godhead. A devotee does not hanker for a son or a daughter. If they come he is happy and he or she endeavours to make them Krishna conscious. A devotee does not depend on his son or daughter. He depends totally on Krishna. Any child born in a devotee family is a special gift.
To make their child Krishna conscious, the grihastha couple should impart the Vedic samskaras (Samskar means “purificatory rite.”), right from his/her birth and thus help the child to eventually attain the spiritual platform. It should be realized that spiritual health and hence the well-being of the human society is greatly affected by the samskaras imparted to the child.
“Janmana jayate shudrah samskarat bhavet dvijah”. By birth, everyone is a sudra, but by performance of samskaras one becomes a brahmana.
Mahabharat (Shanti parva) mentions that there are 48 samskaras to be performed on every human being. Srila Gopal Bhatta Gosvami has considered 10 samskaras to be of prime importance for Gaudiya Vaishnavas and also described how to perform them in his book, entitled “Satkriya sar dipika,” regarded by Srila Bhakti Siddhanta Sarasvati Thakura as the most authoritative book on this subject of Samskaras for Kaliyuga. Here, only Garbhadan samskar will be dealt with.
Garbhadan samskara: Purification of a human being starts even before his birth and this samskara is called Garbhadan samskar. By the performance of this samskara , the physical contact between a man and a woman is sanctified. Also intelligent, pious and God-conscious children are born by the strength of performance of Garbhadan samskara. This is the most important samskara which Srila Prabhupada has emphasised in all his purports on the subject. Grihastas should produce children as a sacrifice to Lord Vishnu. Grihasthas give birth to children to make them Krishna conscious and liberate them.
Young children are like sponges. They soak up Krishna consciousness and there is practically no need to expose them to anything but Krishna consciousness. Children should be protected from worldly pleasure by cultivating a joyous Krishna conscious atmosphere in the house so that the children are completely satisfied and their creative abilities are properly channelized. Unfortunately, in the modern society, parents have no time for their children. They give them comforts but not abundant affection and concern, which are needed at all the stages in their life. Children should be handled with affection and discipline.
Chanakya Pandit’s instructions that children be given abundant affection till the age of five; disciplined, if necessary, till they attain the age of ten and a child be treated as a friend once he attains the age of sixteen, should be used with circumspection.
Giving care, time and affection to one’s child is one of the most important aspects of raising a child in Krishna consciousness. However, if the parents do not have time for their own sadhana, do not have time to associate with devotees, they will not be able to inculcate high quality Krishna consciousness in their child despite their affection. Therefore raising children in Krishna consciousness is a matter of an intelligent and mature balance.
Srila Prabhupada in his Srimad Bhagavatam purports (1.5.24) has stated that an irresponsible life of sense enjoyment was unknown to the children of the followers of the varnasrama system. The boy was even injected with spiritual acumen before being placed by the father in the womb of the mother. Both the father and the mother were responsible for the boy’s success in being liberated from the material bondage. That is the process of successful family planning. It is to beget children for complete perfection. Without being self-controlled, without being disciplined and without being fully obedient, no one can become successful in following the instructions of the spiritual master, and without doing so, no one is able to go back to Godhead.
In one letter to Bhaktin Toni (Sydney; 73-02-18), Srila Prabhupada has compared the children of one of his disciples to the Deities in the temple. Just as some devotees have to devote full-time to taking care of the Deities in the temple, some devotees have to dedicate much time to taking care of their small children; and they are not ordinary children, they are devotees. Serving, guiding, and training Krishna’s devotees will make you very dear to Lord Krishna.
These material bodies are just dresses for the soul. Our identities based on the body and mind are temporary and illusory. Our real identities are loving servants of Krishna and His devotees, and whatever we are doing here in the material world is practice for our eternal life in the spiritual world, where we will serve Krishna and His devotees in ecstatic love. As Srila Prabhupada said, if a high school student is doing college-level work, he can be promoted to college. So if we are in the material world but are engaged in the activities of the spiritual world, we can be promoted to the spiritual world. The basic activity of the spiritual world, which includes chanting the holy names and glories of Sri Krishna, is to render loving service to Krishna and the other servants of Krishna. And the grihastha ashrama is a quintessential establishment for practicing loving service, which can qualify us for eternal loving service in the spiritual world.
Your Servant,
Mathura Vasi Devi Dasi.
Hare Krsna Mataji,
PAMHO.
Every living being has 4 needs - eating, sleeping, mating and defending. So its a basic need for every living entity, including human beings. Eating is regulated by honouring only Krsna prasadam, sleeping is regulated by sleeping only 6 hrs a day, mating is regulated by mating for having Krsna conscious children, defending is regulated by defending the philosophy and Krsna's devotees.
There is nothing wrong with having a partner and wanting to have children with that partner. Therefore, the lord regulated society by making the institution of marriage, where the sanctity of the relation is maintained, one is regulated and the couple together progress towards godhead. On the flip side, if all men were to become brahmacharis, then where would all the women go and from where the next generation would come?
Like already explained - Grihasta ashram is the only ashram where earning and mating are permitted. Therefore, grihastas who are vaishyas have the responsibility to feed all the other varnas and ashramas. So the roles have also been defined, though they have got diluted in modern times - one goes out and earns and the other takes care of the house and rears children.
A child is a soul provided by God to the parents. The responsibility of the parents is to show the child the path to spirituality, explain the purpose of life and make that soul Krsna Conscious. That is the success of grihasta ashram. Of course, every soul is responsible for its karma, but the grihasta has to make the family environment such that it is conducive to Krsna Consciousness.
I hope I have been able to explain.
Haribol,
Your servant,
Rashmi