Hare Krsna
Sometimes I see different feautures of Krsna when I remember Him or chant His name or out of the blue when I am not thinking about Him at all!
Sometimes I do wish to see Him in my mind and sincerely chant His name but at the same time I do not wish to disturb Him in case He is busy with Srimati Radharani or others somewhere.
I consider myself more sinful and regretibly not very much insignificant or worthless, that is why I only seek the shelter of Krsna. Except for Him who could understand a crazy person like me?
I am very pleased when Krsna reciprocates. On the other hand even if He frees me from all the sins I have committed, comitting and will commit, if He deprives me of His presence then what is the use of existence?
I mean I don't want to be disappointed because perhaps Krsna has His reasons for delayed response sometimes!
It is not a question actually, it is more like a riddle that I have been unable to solve and I fear I am making more enemies then friends in life nowadays although no one is my enemy!
Basically what I am trying to say is that without Krsna I am a dead. I want to help Him so that He can help me and for that I very much need to feel His presence constantly. No more separation.
Hari bol
Replies
Hare Krsna Mataji
He appears in my mind like a deity or some painting from the Srimad-Bhagavatam, not as sloka number but as sloka itself.
I want to help all poor animals, birds and fish from slaughter. I want Him to help me on this.
I am dead without Him. By that I mean assasination in future if He doesn't come to my rescue. It's hard to explain this so leave it.
I posted another question:
How to choose between love and freedom?
Perhaps you may answer that since I might just delete this.
Hari bol
Yes for example like being fired by a bullet from a distance by a sniper.