Hare Krishna Dear Devotees , Please Accept my humble Obeisance , All Glories to Srila prabhupada ..
This is Madhan Kumar , I got married recently ( 2 months back ) , Prior to my marriage i was staying in BACE , I have been noticing my sadhana has been reduced vastly after marriage , I have listened in many lecture stating Both the husband and wife should lead a life keeping krishna in center but couldn't get a proper solution , Kindly suggest me practical application which you senior devotees would have applied in your life to balance Devotion , family and Job.
Your Humble Servant
Madhan Kumar
Replies
Hare Krishna Prabhuji,
Dandavats, All glories to Srila Prabhupada,
There are may intructions which we have been hearing and reading, so atleast we know theoretically, what is to be done.
In your case also, you know that you have to keep Krishna in center & lead a life of a "Devotee". But...
When it comes to practical application of what we know, we usually fail.
I just want to suggest that both of you have to sit together & talk to each other on this topic of diminished sadhana. Just ponder what has changed after your marriage. You are the same person who used to chant your rounds, do book distribution & other sevas & mataji is also the same person. Only thing what has changed is now both of you have to take care of each other. Rest all is same.
Pls engage in your daily activities as you did earlier with a determined mind. The bodily wants will make you lethargic, insincere, illusioned & untruthful. Talk openly to senior devotees around you. The tendency among grihasthas is that they start behaving good in public (aomng devotees) and as a materialist behind the four walls. Just remember, the goal of life has not changed only the ashram has changed. To maintain the respect among yourselves (u & ur wife) you have to follow regulative principles & sadhana & seva strictly. It's difficult but not impossible.
The reason why you got married is not to fall back in maya but to advance in KC in a different ashrama. Keep in touch with me. Also keep mataji(your wife) in loop. Share this question & solutions with her too.
Wishing you all the best in KC married life.
Radha Rasikraj Das (ISKCON Desire Tree - हिंदी)
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Hare Krishna Pr ji , danvatpranam .
All glories to srila Prabhupada .
Thank you so much prabhu ji , What all you said is true . Yes i am the same person was doing my rounds , book distribution and other Seva's , and she was also engaged in different service . Your Words are very Inspiring pr ji . Would try to follow my schedule which we followed earlier
Hare Krsna Prabhuji,
PAMHO.
Thank you for the question - this is a very relevant question to all newly weds.
What you know is correct - to keep Krsna in the centre of your relationship. Now, how to do that - you should look onto your wife as a partner/ friend who will help in your sadhana towards Krsna consciousness and she should do the same. The idea of being together should not be sense gratification, but to together progress spiritually. Consider your wife to be a soul Krsna has given you to take care, to guide, and she in turn should look upto you as a friend Krsna has given to serve and to guide her, such that both of you progress towards Krsna bhakti. You have to associate with each other as devotees also, not just as a couple.
You have to be very firm in your chanting - no compromise at all on that. If possible, both of you chant together, go to the temple together, attend lectures and programs together, read together. This is a very important aspect - you should read together - start with Bhagawad Gita. Maybe you could read 2 books the same day - Gita as well as Krsna book or Ramayan book.
Ensure that whatever is cooked in your house is first offered to the deities and then only it is eaten.
Gradually, you shoudl get up in the morning and attend mangalarati together.
There is a lot of togetherness in the relationship prabhu. If you follow the regulative principle, your marriage will remain new for a very long time. Isnt the best feeling in the world to be in a new marriage? You can prolong this feeling by following the regulative principles.
Under all circumstances, chant. The purpose of a marriage is to help each other progress spiritually. Always keep your progress.
Haribol,
Your servant,
Rashmi