relationships with non-devotees

Hare Krishna,

   My mother (who is not a devotee) keeps attempting to get me involved with this girl (who is also not a devotee) and I feel like it would hinder my spiritual life (not to mention that I really don't have any sort of affection for her.)  But in the recent past, while I was starting to delve into Vaishnavism, I went on a few dates with some non-devotee girls but I don't think they understood  I know there are KC people that are involved in marriages/relationships with those who aren't (Srila Prabhupada would be a perfect example) but it just seems like it would be caustic.  Does anyone have any experience with this that could give me some insight?  Hari bol.

Your humble servant.

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  • Hare Krishna

    In my experience, I have twice dated non devotee girls, both relationships spanned acrossed many years i.e. more then 2 - 3 years.

    Despite being in the association of brahmacaris and devotees at my local temple twice my spiritual life suffered.

    So from my personal experience I would say best to avoid.

    However having said that, Maya is potent and is also Krishnas energy even in KC relationships / marriages it is not so straight forward and easy. Yes it helps you both have 1 common goal i.e. to serve Lord Krishna however the nature of this world is that situations / circumstances / people constantly change so whilst you are at an advantage by dating someone who knows and has an understanding of KC ultimately there are no guarantees in this world.

    The nature of our soul is pleasure seeking, we want to be loved and to give love, whilst alot of KC relationships begin (from what I have heard) with keeping Krishna at the centre, slowly due to demands of daily life i.e. acquiring wealth, land and then having kids these responsibilities can easily take over thus affecting your spiritual life.

    Devotees who have successful relationships in KC are those who have been practicing for many years and are very fixed up. For beginners like me its best to love Krishna and he will reciprocate by sending you devotee friends that you can start friendships with that are more fulfilling then material temporary relationships.

    Hope that helps

    Your Servant,

  • Volunteer

    Prabhuji, if You do not live at the Temple as Brahmachari then the best thing for You is to get married and take responsibility of family life. Otherwise it is not good to live without any responsibility (i do not say it to You, i am sure that You have many responsibilities.) 

    But if You want to have association of opposite sex then You have to marry to a suitable person and take responsibility.  

    Our life is sacrifice, we can not enjoy our senses as we wish as like Devas do. Earth planet is for giving up debts and leave this mortal world. Not for temporary dates with girls, isn't it!? :)

    plus if those girls are not Devotees then they will have dates 2-3 times and if they find someone will leave us, don't You think so?!

    In this way our heart be broken. and if we will have lots of girlfriends then our heart will be broken for many times.

    Very painful.

    Your servant, 

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