Hare Krishna to all the fellow devotees,All glories to srilavprabhupad,Dear Devotees, please hear my predicaments,I'm a 17 year old living in Singapore, and before coming into Krishna Consciousness, which is about roughly 7 months, I had a very sinful habits of meat eating and watching explicit content and gratify my genital urges while watching those kind of degraded videos. After coming into KC, I completely stopped eating meat and remained as a celibate for good 5 months. Now it has came back to haunt me, no matter what I do, hear hari katha, chant 16 rounds, and distract myself, I just lost it. I was very happy that I thought I finally stopped it. But now all is lost. My spiritual life has gone down the drain and now I'm bewildered even if krishna or gauranga will even accept me. It's very hard for me, my parents are non devotees so they don't really favour my Krishna consciousness activities, my "friends" are not at all into spirituality, it's too pressuring for me. Everytime I try to chant, I have an enormous amount of guilt. I don't know why, even though I know it's all Maya, we are not this bodies and importance of semen retention, it's as though completely controlling me, despite my best efforts to chant. I have no association with vaishnavas as my parents don't allow me to. What can I do in this kind of circumstances? Will krishna accept me once more? Thanks a lot, Hare Krishna.
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Go to Krishna, pray with all your sincerity that He forgive you, and then start getting better, prabhu.
When you pray to Krishna, He listens. He cannot turn a deaf ear to His dear devotees.
We all fall sometimes prabhu, this is why we are in the material world. We still have much to learn. Moments of suffering like this are actually a blessing, since they make us turn to Krishna and His devotees to help us.
Krishna is so merciful prabhu. Just see for yourself how willingly He will accept you even after such sins. Repent, and praise Krishna for His mercy...
And as other have said, association with devotees is crucial to spiritual life. It's a good thing you came here. It shows that you have a desire for spiritual life. You are so young prabhu, your life is going to change in ways you never thought possible. Keep chanting. Have faith.
Thanks a lot mataji, but my parents and my family members don't really let me mingle with vaishnavas, they say you can do all these when you are old, despite I try to convince them, they simply do not accept it. It's very tough here, there is no iskcon temple in Singapore, but there are vaishnavas in an area far from my home conduct iskcon activities. My parents don't allow me to go there. So I simply can't do anything, I only went there a few times and got a devotee's phone number so that I can whatsapp him. Regarding that unpleasant incident, I have promised krishna that I shall stop all that and watch only KC videos. I found out what triggered me to do that. I'm doing my best efforts to stop it. Regarding my eating habits, I still continue my vegetarian diet, only consume onion and garlic if my parents cook that, if not I will avoid it completely. Thanks a lot for hearing me out, I feel much better. Hare Krishna.
Pls dont be disappointed. Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu is most merciful. He came for us fallen souls only.
Pls dont feel guilty at all - continue to chant ..... as in, it is correct to feel guilty, but not to the extent it interferes with sadhana. One has to continue to do sadhana whichever way one can - otherwise there is no hope for us.
You have not mentioned association of devotees - that is most important. If you can somehow get into an association of devotees, your problem will be solved. What you can do is:
a) Visit your local ISKCON temple and inquire about congregational development and specifically college preaching - if anything is happening.
b) Connect with the congregation closest to your house or college and remain connected.
c) Continue the existing - chanting, reading, keeping yourself busy.
d) If possible, eat only vegeterian food - no onion, no garlic. If you cannot avoid onion garlic, atleast it should be vegeterian. If you endeavour to please Krsna by eating only vveg food without onion and garlic, I am sure Krsna will find some way for you to maintain that. A little struggle may be there in the beginning - it is just to test your resolve.
Replies
When you pray to Krishna, He listens. He cannot turn a deaf ear to His dear devotees.
We all fall sometimes prabhu, this is why we are in the material world. We still have much to learn. Moments of suffering like this are actually a blessing, since they make us turn to Krishna and His devotees to help us.
Krishna is so merciful prabhu. Just see for yourself how willingly He will accept you even after such sins. Repent, and praise Krishna for His mercy...
And as other have said, association with devotees is crucial to spiritual life. It's a good thing you came here. It shows that you have a desire for spiritual life. You are so young prabhu, your life is going to change in ways you never thought possible. Keep chanting. Have faith.
Hare Krishna
Peace and love brother
Hare Krsna Dean Prabhu,
PAMHO.
This query is raised by a prabhu.
Now pls give similar principle for vaishnava.
Haribol,
Your servant,
Radha Rasamayi DD
There is three solutions:
-Leave the home and and live in the temple in the association of vaishnavas under the shelter of Guru.
-Leave everything far away and wander as homeless under complete shelter of Lord.
-If he can not do one of this two, then for sore he need to get married and start family life.
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Thanks a lot mataji, but my parents and my family members don't really let me mingle with vaishnavas, they say you can do all these when you are old, despite I try to convince them, they simply do not accept it. It's very tough here, there is no iskcon temple in Singapore, but there are vaishnavas in an area far from my home conduct iskcon activities. My parents don't allow me to go there. So I simply can't do anything, I only went there a few times and got a devotee's phone number so that I can whatsapp him. Regarding that unpleasant incident, I have promised krishna that I shall stop all that and watch only KC videos. I found out what triggered me to do that. I'm doing my best efforts to stop it. Regarding my eating habits, I still continue my vegetarian diet, only consume onion and garlic if my parents cook that, if not I will avoid it completely. Thanks a lot for hearing me out, I feel much better. Hare Krishna.
Hare Krsna Prabhuji,
PAMHO.
Pls dont be disappointed. Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu is most merciful. He came for us fallen souls only.
Pls dont feel guilty at all - continue to chant ..... as in, it is correct to feel guilty, but not to the extent it interferes with sadhana. One has to continue to do sadhana whichever way one can - otherwise there is no hope for us.
You have not mentioned association of devotees - that is most important. If you can somehow get into an association of devotees, your problem will be solved. What you can do is:
a) Visit your local ISKCON temple and inquire about congregational development and specifically college preaching - if anything is happening.
b) Connect with the congregation closest to your house or college and remain connected.
c) Continue the existing - chanting, reading, keeping yourself busy.
d) If possible, eat only vegeterian food - no onion, no garlic. If you cannot avoid onion garlic, atleast it should be vegeterian. If you endeavour to please Krsna by eating only vveg food without onion and garlic, I am sure Krsna will find some way for you to maintain that. A little struggle may be there in the beginning - it is just to test your resolve.
Best of luck dear,
Pls be in touch.
Haribol,
Your servant,
Radha Rasamayi DD