My husband SHOULD be only mine!

Hare Krsna to all devotees,

Please accept my humble obeisance,

All Glories to Srila Prabhupad,

I am getting married in few weeks. I am very tensed and nervous. I am just a beginner in KC and my would be husband is not a devotee.He is based in Singapore and I will be shifting with him after marriage. the place Singapore is more materialistic than India, there is more Maya there, how do I am preserve my chastity among men,truthfulness and purity there is a thing that is worrying me.I wish to stay true to him throughout my life.

Even, I am worried about my Sadhana there, will he permit or not?

My constant fear, he should love only me and not go behind other other women or associate after marriage.

Also, I have read in scriptures that common man can have two wives, though legally not permitted, I feel that taking scriptures as source, he might do such act. This is what I am fearing because I want his total love and the same I should do to him. I feel that any slight fight he will leave me and go behind other women.

Such thoughts are coming to my mind.

My only wish is to progress further in K.C, make my husband a devotee and also my future child.

Please help me come out of this fear and do my duties religiously as per scriptures.

Haribol

You need to be a member of ISKCON Desire Tree | IDT to add comments!

Join ISKCON Desire Tree | IDT

Email me when people reply –

Replies

    • This is called tapasya. Just like Ekadashi day-there is no eating sumptuously. Simply you take little fruits and flowers. Try to avoid that also. You don't take even water. That is really ekadashi. But because we cannot do it-in the Kali-yuga the time is different-therefore we are allowed to take little fruit and milk, which is called anukalpa. These are different methods of tapasya.
      (ACBSP. Pandal program Bombay 7th April 1971.)

      SB 4.28.35-36
      We can definitely see that to advance in Krishna consciousness one must control his bodily weight. If one becomes too fat, it is to be assumed that he is not advancing spiritually. Shrila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura severely criticized his fat disciples. The idea is that one who intends to advance in Krishna consciousness must not eat very much. Devotees used to go to forests, high hills or mountains on pilgrimages, but such severe austerities are not possible in these days. One should instead eat only prasada and no more than required. ACCORDING TO THE VAISNAVA CALENDAR, THERE ARE MANY FASTS, SUCH AS EKADASI AND THE APPEARANCE AND DISAPPEARANCE DAYS OF GOD AND HIS DEVOTEES. ALL OF THESE ARE MEANT TO DECREASE THE FAT WITHIN THE BODY SO THAT ONE WILL NOT SLEEP MORE THAN DESIRED AND WILL NOT BECOME INACTIVE AND LAZY. Overindulgence in food will cause a man to sleep more than required. This human form of life is meant for austerity, and austerity means controlling sex, food intake, etc. In this way time can be saved for spiritual activity, and one can purify himself both externally and internally. Thus both body and mind can be cleansed.

      Shri Chaitanya Chandramrita >> Ch 6 Self-criticism for not accepting Lord Gauranga >> 52: Giving up all useless attempts for spiritual practices... >>


      Verse 52: Giving up all useless attempts for spiritual practices...

      ha hanta hanta paramoshara-citta-bhumau
      vyarthi bhavanti mama sadhana-kotayo’pi
      sarvatmana tad aham adbhuta-bhakti-bijam
      shri-gauracandra-caranam sharanam karomi (52)


      Verse 52: "Alas! Alas! Alas! I am doomed. Since my heart has become an extremely unfertile and barren desert due to my heinous offenses, millions of seeds of spiritual practices and pious deeds fail to sprout there in spite of my repeatedly sowing them. Thus I have now decided that I will give up all my useless attempts to engage in such spiritual practices and instead with all my full heart and endeavor, I shall plant in my heart the strikingly wonderful seed of pure devotional service of exclusive shelter to the Lotus Feet and Holy Name of the Supreme Lord Gauranga Mahaprabhu, which will certainly bear fruit in my despondent heart."

      •  Shri Chaitanya Chandramrita >> Ch 1 Auspicious Invocation of Lord Gauranga >> 5: Operation of the Senses and Liberation becomes Hellish... >>


        Verse 5: Operation of the Senses and Liberation becomes Hellish...

        kaivalyam narakayate tri-dasha-pur akasha-pushpayate
        durdantendriya-kala-sarpa-patali protkhata-damshtrayate
        vishvam purna-sukhayate vidhi-mahendradish ca kitayate
        yat-karunya-kataksha-vaibhavavatam tam gauram eva stumah (5)


        Verse 5: "For those most supremely fortunate souls who have even once attained the opulence of the most merciful and compassionate sidelong glance of Lord Gauranga and His Holy Name, impersonal liberation becomes as palatable as going to hell. The happiness of the heavenly planets of the demigods becomes as trivial and inconsequential as flowers imagined to be floating in the sky. The venomous and poisonous fangs of the untamable black snakes of the senses become extracted and uprooted, the whole world which is full of misery and suffering becomes full of supreme joy and the greatly exalted positions of Brahma, Indra and all the demigods become as insignificant as those of tiny insects. Let us therefore certainly and constantly glorify that most merciful Lord Shri Gauranga Mahaprabhu and His Supreme Holy Name."

        Verse 99: Become secure about the safety of family members...

        kashi-vasan api na ganaye kim gayam margayamo
        muktih shuktibhavati yadi me kah parartha-prasangah
        trasabhasah sphurati na maha-raurave’pi kva bhitih
        stri-putradau yadi kripayate deva-devah sa gaurah (99)


        Verse 99: "If the Supreme Personality of Godhead Lord Gauranga Mahaprabhu and His Holy Name are causelessly merciful unto me then why should I consider the impersonalists of Varanasi to be very important and why should I go on a pilgrimage to Gaya to offer oblations to my ancestors? If Lord Gauranga and His Holy Name are merciful to me then my personal liberation does not hold as much weight as even a fraction of an ounce to me what to speak of the petty worldly achievements of religiosity, economic development and sense gratification, the three other secondary goals of life. If Lord Gauranga and His Holy Name are merciful upon me, I will not feel a glimpse of distress even if I have to go to the most horrible Maharaurava hell. If Lord Gauranga and His Holy Name are merciful unto me then I will have absolutely no fear and anxiety about the well-being of my wife, children, friends and relatives."

        Verse 24: Supreme virtues of Lord Gauranga's devotees...

        trinad api nicata sahaja-saumya-mugdhakritih
        sudha-madhura-bhashita vishaya-gandha-thuthutkritih
        hari-pranaya-vihvala kim api dhiranalambhita
        bhavanti kila sad-guna jagati gaura-bhajam ami (24)


        Verse 24: "Humbly thinking oneself more fallen than a blade of straw; natural, spontaneous, charming and gentle bodily features; sweet speech full of relishable nectar; repeatedly spitting at the insignificant desires for sense gratification; total disinterest and obliviousness to the temporary material affairs of this world; and supremely overwhelming love for Lord Gaurahari are the supreme transcendental virtues of the pure devotees of Lord Gauranga who constantly chant and relish His Holy Name."

        Verse 113: All useless activities have ended...

        stri-putradi-katham jahur vishayinah shastra-pravadam budha
        yogindra vijahur marun-niyama-ja-klesham tapas tapasah
        jnanabhyasa-vidhim jahush ca yatayash chaitanya-candre para
        mavishkurvati bhakti-yoga-padavim naivanya asid rasah (113)


        Verse 113: "Now that the divine moon of Lord Gauranga Mahaprabhu and His Holy Name have splendidly manifested the supreme platform of pure devotional service, the gross materialistic sense-gratifiers have abandoned the discussion about their wives, children and material affairs, the scholars have given up debating the scriptures, the most advanced yogis have given up their efforts to control their breath and follow the yamas and niyamas, the greatest of renunciants have given up the misery of performing severe austerities, and the impersonalitic gyanis have given up their pursuits for speculative knowledge. Thus now there is nothing more sweet then the ambrosial nectar emanating from Lord Gauranga's Lotus Feet and His Holy Name."

        Verse 120: Illiterate are eclipsing the scholars...

        hasanty uccair uccair ahaha kula-vadhvo’pi parito
        dravibhavam gacchanty api kuvishaya-grava-ghatitah
        tiraskurvanty ajna api sakala-shastrajna-samitim
        kshitau shri-caitanye’dbhuta-mahima-sare’vatarati (120)


        Verse 120: "Since the supremely brilliant and glorious essence of all incarnations Lord Gauranga Mahaprabhu and His Holy Name have advented in this world, everywhere the saintly men and women are blissfully, repeatedly, and loudly laughing due to being intoxicated by pure love; the rock-like hearts of the materiastic people which were hardened by the wretched desires for the sense-pleasures of this world are melting by the touch of Lord Gauranga's Glories and Name; and even the illiterate and unlettered devotees are eclipsing and rejecting the community of a host of 'learned' atheistic scholars."

        Verse 43: Not acquainted with Lord Gauranga are doomed...

        dhig astu kulam ujjvalam dhig api vagmitam dhig yasho
        dhig adhyayanam akritim nava-vayah shriyam castu dhik
        dvijatvam api dhik param vimalam ashramadyam ca dhik
        na cet paricitah kalau prakata-gaura-gopi-patih (43)


        Verse 43: "Condemned is his noble birth and high lineage! Doomed is his eloquence and artistic abilities! Pathetic is his fame and reputation! Denounced is his learning of the scriptures, his physical beauty and handsome youthfulness and his hard-earned wealth! Condemned is his advanced status as a brahmana and even his dutiful practices of discharging his occupational duties! Hopelessly condemned are all these people who even after taking birth in this rare Kali Yuga do not want to become acquainted with the golden Supreme Personality of Godhead Lord Gopipati Gauranga Mahaprabhu and the chanting of His Holy Name and Pastimes."

        Verse 85: Never try to become God...

        vrithavesham karmasv apanayata vartam api manak
        na karnabhyarne’pi kvacana nayatadhyatma-saraneh
        na moham dehadau bhajata paramashcarya-madhurah
        pumarthanam maulir milati bhavatam gaura-kripaya (85)


        Verse 85: "Please throw far away all useless material duties and activities and never ever indulge your mind in the dull gossip of this world. I beg you to kindly never allow even a single word of the monistic, impersonalistic and Advaitic theories of becoming one with God to ever enter your ears. Kindly reject all the illusions about your material body, family and about all the temporary paraphernalia in relation to them. Please take exclusive shelter of the causeless mercy emanating and flowing from Lord Gauranga and His Holy Name and thus attain pure love for the Divine Couple Shri Shri Radha and Krishna, which is the supreme crest-jewel of all human endeavors."

        Verse 19: Desire for liberation will not become bitter unless...

        tavad brahma-katha vimukti-padavi tavan na tikti-bhavet
        tavac capi vishrinkhalatvam ayate no loka-veda-sthitih
        tavac chastra-vidam mithah kala-kalo nana-bahir-vartmasu
        shri-chaitanya-padambuja-priya-jano yavan na drig-gocarah (19)


        Verse 19: "Discussion of and desire for the advanced stage of impersonal liberation will not become bitter and distasteful, the tight shackles of blind adherence to social, religious and Vedic conventional rules will not become slackened and the tumultuous speculative debates of the Vedic scholars on the merits of various useless spiritual paths will continue unabated unless one achieves the supreme good fortune of the direct audience of an intimate devotee who is like a bumblebee constantly drinking the nectar of the Lotus Feet and Holy Name of Lord Gauranga Mahaprabhu."

        Verse 142: Fruit of reading Shri Chaitanya Chandramrita

        brahmeshadi-mahashcarya-mahimapi mahaprabhuh
        mugdha-baloditam shrutva snigdho’vashyam bhavishyati (142)


        Verse 142: "The transcendental opulences and glories of the Supreme Lord Gauranga Mahaprabhu and His Holy Name supremely astonish Brahma, Shiva and all the demigods. On even partially hearing or reading this sweet offering of the nectarean verses of Shri Chaitanya Chandramrita from this enchanted child (the author) even once, Lord Gauranga Mahaprabhu and His Holy Name will certainly become affectionate and causelessly merciful to that person and award him or her with the supremely blissful pure love for Himself."

        IRRESPECTIVE OF PIETY OR IMPIETY, ONE SHOULD ENGAGE IN DEVOTIONAL SERVICE.


    • Chapter Eleven
      Anya-shubha-karmer Sahita Namake Tulya-jnana
      To Consider the Chanting of Hare Krishna One of the Auspicious Ritualistic Activities Offered in the Vedas as Fruitive Activities (Karma-kanda)

      dharma-vrata-tyaga-hutadi-sarva-
      shubha-kriya-samyam api pramadah

      "To consider the chanting of Hare Krishna one of the auspicious ritualistic activities offered in the Vedas as fruitive activities (karma-kanda)."*

      1. Glory, glory to the holy names of Lord Chaitanya, which have now descended to this world! Glory, glory to the holy names of Lord Krishna, which are the highest of all spiritual truths!
      2. Haridasa said, "O Lord, please listen carefully. Other pious deeds are not equal to the holy name.

      The Nature of the Holy Name

      3. "O Lord, You are like a spiritual sun. That is Your nature. You are perfectly spiritual. Your nature is wonderful.
      4. "Your form is completely spiritual in every way. You holy name, abode, and pastimes are all completely spiritual.
      5. "Your primary names are not in any way different from You. Your holy name is not material.
      6. "Descending from the world of Goloka, Your holy name enters Your devotees' mouths.
      7. "Your holy name enters the spirit soul, fills the material body, and dances on the tongue and in other parts of the body also.
      8. "This is the truth about Your holy name. Anyone who thinks Your holy name is material will be burdened by many sufferings. (1)

      Lord Krishna's Feet Are the Goal of Life. People With Different Qualifications Attain Them By Different Means

      9. "O Lord, the sciptures describe different ways to attain You. The different ways exist because people are qualified in different ways. (2)

      The Nature of Karma. Other Material Pious Deeds. The Spiritual Goal

      10. "O Lord, material-minded people who take shelter of material things and material situations worship You when they are called by fear.
      11. "O Lord Krishna, no one is like You. Your feet grant fearlessness. Simply by taking shelter of Your feet, the people cross the ocean of birth and death.
      12. "To attain Your feet the material-minded people have invented many material means.
      13-14. "Ishtapurta, yajnas, pious deeds, ritual bathing, homa, charity, yoga, varnashrama-dharma, travel to holy places, vows, worship of the pitas, meditation, study, worship of the demigods, austerities, and atonement are among the activities they perform.
      15. "Taking shelter of these material pious deeds, they try to attain their goal.
      16. "However, by these means they attain only temporary results. They have turned away from true perfection. (3)
      17. "Now please hear about the best of all goals. The goal that brings perfection, that brings spiritual bliss.

      Auspicious Pious Deeds As the Way to Attain the Goal of Life

      18. "Material things and material situations have no spiritual bliss. Still, they may be auspicious for the conditioned soul, for they may gradually lead him to perfection. (4)
      19. "Therefore auspicious pious deeds may be a means to attain the final perfection that is pure love (prema) for Lord Krishna.

      That Means Brings a Delay in Attaining Perfection

      20. "When pious deeds are employed the attainment of perfection is delayed. That is because of the distance that stands between the means and the goal. (5)

      Why Is the Holy Name the True Means When One Strives For Perfection?

      21. "O Lord, You mercifully gave to the world the holy name of Lord Krishna. Intelligent souls will chant the holy name to attain perfection.
      22. "The holy name is the primary way to attain perfection. That is the scriptures' conclusion. Other pious deeds are counted as secondary ways to attain perfection.
      23. "They are primary and secondary in the same way as Lord Vishnu is the primary controller of everything in the three worlds, and the demigods Brahma and Shiva are secondary controllers after Him.

      The Holy Name Is Made of Spiritual Goodness. The Mayavadis Offensively Think the Holy Name is Like Other Pious Activities

      24. "Theholy name is made of pure spiritual goodness. Even the scent of matter never touches the pure holy name.
      25. "Souls who tend to think in material terms assume that chanting the holy name is a material pious deed. (6)
      26. "From the mayavada philosophy this offense to the holy name has come. Anyone who accepts this wicked idea finds his progress is devotional service is blocked.

      The Holy Name Is Both the Means and the Goal

      27. "Lord Krishna's holy name is perfect and blissful Lord Krishna Himself. Therefore the holy name is itself the goal. Attaining the glory of the holy name is the attainment of perfection.
      28. "Manifest on the surface of the earth, the holy name is also the means to attain perfection. It is both the means and the goal. This all the scriptures say.
      29. "According to their qualification, different souls understand the holy name differently. For some the holy name is the means to attain perfection. For others the holy name is the beautiful, wonderful goal. (7)

      Material Pious Deeds Are the Srcondary Way to Attain Perfection. The Holy Name Is The Primary Way

      30. "The glorious ways to attain perfection are of two kinds. Material pious deeds are the secondary way, and the holy name is the primary way. (8)

      The Holy Name Is Beyond the Touch of the Material Senses

      31. "In the scriptures it is said that material pious deeds are not equal to the holy name. That truth is at the heart of all the scriptures.
      32. "Anyone who with a sincere heart chants the holy name of Lord Krishna finds spiritual happiness, happiness beyond the touch of the material senses, dances within his heart.
      33. "That spiritual happiness is part of the holy name's nature. Nothing is more wonderful than the holy name's pastimes and bliss.

      That Happiness of Impersonal Liberation Is A Shadow of That Happiness

      34. "Thw happiness of impersonal liberation is only a shadow of the happiness of chanting the holy name.
      35. "I know that the happiness of impersonal liberation is very small and trifling, but the bliss of chanting Lord Krishna's holy name is very great and glorious.

      Chanting the Holy Name Is Different From Material Pious Deeds

      36. "At the time of performing sadhana, the holy name is the means to attain perfection. At the time when one attains perfection, the holy name is the beautiful and wonderful goal.
      37. "The holy name is both the means and the final goal. Material pious deeds are not the final goal.
      38. "Ordinary pious deeds all take shelter of matter. The holy name is spiritual. It is eternal and self-perfect.
      39. "At the time of performing sadhana, the holy name is always pure and free of any defect, even though the aspiring devotee (sadhaka) may have many anarthas, many unwanted defects and impurities.
      40. "By chanting the holy name and associating with devotees, the aspirant chases away his material misconceptions. When his anarthas are no more, the pure chanting of the holy name comes to him.
      41. "Abandoning material pious deeds, at the end he takes shelter of ecstatic love for Lord Krishna.
      42. "However, a person who takes shelter of the holy name never abandons the holy name. When he attains perfection he attains pure chanting of the holy name.
      43. "In this way the chanting of the holy name is different from material pious deeds. The holy name has wonderful transcendental qualities.
      44. "By the spiritual master's mercy, even at the time of sadhana one may understand the wonderful glory of the holy name. This the Vedas confirm. (9)
      45. "If at the time of sadhana one does not understand the holy name's glory, one is a great fool, an offender.
      46. " `The holy is is highest of all. The holy name has no equal.' He who has firm faith in these words may properly chant the holy name.
      47. "Soon he attains pure chanting of the holy name. He takes shelter of the perfect blissful nectar of the holy name.

      The Remedy For This Offense

      48. "If one thinks the chanting of the holy name is one of the many material pious deeds, one commits an impious deed. (10)
      49. "One should take care to extinguish that impious thought. Then one will understand the holy name's purity. Eventually one will attain a great treasure of pure love for Lord Krishna.
      50. "One should anoint one's body with dust from the feet of an outcaste grihastha who is devoted to pure chanting of the holy name. (11)
      51. "One should eat the nectar food that has touched his lips and one should drink the water that has washed his feet. Then one's heart will become pure and one will attain pure chanting of the holy name.
      52. "Kalidasa is an example of such a devotee. Breaking intop pieces their misconceptions, by Your mercy the people of the world may chant the holy name.
      53. "O Lord, my intelligence is dull, stunted, and materialistic. I pray that I may once properly chant the holy name. I have never really attained the cintamani jewel that is Lord Krishna's holy name.

      Haridasa Thakura's Faith in the Holy Name

      54. "O Lord, please be merciful to me. Assuming the form of the holy name, please always dance on my tongue. I grasp Your feet.
      55. "Keep me here, or take me there. Wherever You place me, please give me the nectar of Lord Krishna's holy name. (12)
      56. "To giver the holy name to the people of this world You have descended to this place. Please accept me as one of those people.
      57. "I am the most fallen. But You are the deliverer of the most fallen. O purifier of the fallen, that is our relationship.
      58. "Our relationship can never be broken. Now this fallen person begs from You the nectar of the holy name.

      Why Is the Chanting of the Holy Name the Yuga-dharma for Kali-yuga?

      59. "In Kali-yuga ordinary pious deeds become ineffective. Therefore the holy name is the only yuga-dharma in Kali-yuga. (13)
      60. "Penniless Bhaktivinoda, who is a servant of Haridasa's servants, sings this Hari-nama-cintamani.


      Chapter Eleven Footnotes by Shrila Bhaktivinoda Thakura

      (1) Anyone who thinks Lord Krishna'S holy name is made of maya, the dull and inert material energy, will suffer in hell for a long time. If one sees the face of such a person one must immediately remember Lord Vishnu and bathe, still wearing one's clothing.
      (2) People possess different levels of qualification to attain Lord Krishna. The primary levels are karma, jnana, and bhakti (devotional service). This the scriptures say. One group is the karmis. They are very materialistic. Their hearts should be purified. Another group is the monist jnanis. They are very attached to an illusion. Pure devotional service should be preached to every spirit soul.
      (3) At the time when one attains the perfection of pure devotional service, material karma and other nondevotional activities spontaneously flee far away.
      (4) The conditioned souls have no power to renounce ordinary material activities. All their thoughts and deeds are mixed with material things. A person who uses material pious activities (karma) to find pure devotional service, which is beyond the touch of matter, is expert.
      (5) The goal is pure love (prema) for Lord Krishna. The means described here is material pious activities. A considerable distance separates this means and goal.
      (6) The words "Souls who tend to think in material terms" refer to the spirit souls who, bewildered by ignorance, think that they themselves are material in nature.
      (7) Here "different qualification" means that as long as the soul is not attracted to spiritual life the soul will consider the chanting of the holy names as a means to an end. Thus he engages in blissful spiritual activities as the means to attain a goal.
      (8) The chanting of the holy name is the primary spiritual means and the performance of material pious deeds is the secondary means. They who know the truth say that chanting the holy name is better than performing material pious deeds.
      (9) From faith comes association with devotees. From association with devotees come the activities of devotional service. Again and again performing the activities of devotional service, one becomes free from anarthas. When anartahs are gone one attains pure chanting of the holy name. This is the sequence of events beginning with faith and concluding in spiritual bliss. When engaged in devotional service by the spiritual master's mercy, one should have faith. One who does not have faith commits an offense to the holy name. His anarthas increase.
      (10) This impious deed is an offense to the Vaishnavas. The result of this offense is that one becomes attracted to the mayavadis' mistaken ideas about the holy name.By associating with devotees one destroys this offense. Then one attains faith in the holy name.
      (11) Rejecting the idea that a Vaishnava is a member of a certain caste, one should devotedly smear on one's body the dust form the feet of a saintly person devoted to the pure chanting of the holy name.
      (12) "Here" is the material world. "There" is the spiritual world.
      (13) The chanting of the holy name is always the best spiritual activity in every yuga. However, in the Kali-yuga the people have no faith to properly execute material pious activities. Becoming the yuga-dharma (religion of the age), the holy name descended to the material world and rescued the people of the world from their sufferings.

      >> Mahanidhi Swami >> Art of Chanting Hare Krishna >> 03 Naama Aparadha >> 8. Offense: Equate Nama with Punya Karma >>

       

      8. Offense: Equate Nama with Punya Karma

      Ordinary pious activities {punya karma) like charity, tirtha snanas, yajnas, vrata, tapa, distributing food and building schools award limited results within the temporary world. No material activity can compare with chanting the transcendental names of God, which gives the highest spiritual perfection of eternal, blissful life in Goloka. Chanting the divine name is both the sadhya (supreme goal) and the sadhana (process to attain perfection). The holy name is the word incarnation (sabddvatdra) of the Lord Himself. The eighth offense is to consider the holy name to be on the level of the materially auspicious acts listed above.
      Eighth Offense: Rectification

      One can mitigate this offense born of ignorance by humbly ap¬proaching the Vaisnavas to receive sambandha-jnana. Established in knowledge of nama-tattva, one should avoid this mistake and chant properly. In the following prayer, Thakura Haridasa reveals the mood of submission one needs to surmount this offense. "My dear Lord Caitanya! My consciousness is thoroughly mun¬dane. Though I mouth the names of the Lord, I am too unfortu¬nate to experience their transcendental touchstone qualities. O Lord! I beg You to please appear as the holy name and dance on my tongue. I fall at Your lotus feet and pray. If You like, You can keep me in this material world or place me in the spiritual sky; Whatever You desire, You are free to fulfill. But please let me taste the divine nectar of Krsna's holy name. "You have descended amongst the conditioned souls to distrib¬ute the holy name, so kindly consider me, an insignificant jiva, to be a recepient of Your mercy. I am a fallen soul and You are the savior of the fallen. Let this be our eternal relationship. O Savior! On the strength of this relationship, I am begging from You the nectar Of the holy name." (Harinama-cintamani)
      Shacinandana Swami >> The Nectarean Ocean of the Holy Name >> III. Nama-aparadha�Chanting on the Offensive Stage >> OFFENSE >> 8. Offense >>

      8. Offense
      To Consider the Chanting of Hare krishna One of the Auspicious Ritualistic Activities Offered in the Vedas as Fruitive Activities
      (karma-kanda)
      (dharma-vrata-tyaga-hutadi-sarva-subha-kriyd-samyam ...)

      What is the difference between chanting the holy name and pious activities? The holy name is directly krishna; the way and the goal are identical. The holy name is the process and simultaneously the goal; it is full of spiritual bliss and bestows highest perfection. As for ordinary pious activities—such as altruistic work, fire sacrifice, yoga, purifying baths at holy places, varnasrama duties1, demigod worship, austerity, etc.—the means (or the way) and the goal have to be distinguished. Such actions are solely material al¬though they are good material activities and bring a good material goal. But how can they help to attain a spiritual goal? Chanting, on the other side, is already the goal: it is krishna Himself. One must definitely act in the mode of goodness to be elevated gradually— but ultimately one gives up all material activites, good and bad, and acts only for krishna's pleasure. Chanting, however, is never to be given up—not on the conditioned platform, nor in the liberated state.

      The Original Form of the Holy Name

      No activity can be compared with chanting the holy name. The Supreme Lord is the transcendental sun; His divine form is fully spiritual. All His Deity forms are absolute, just like His name, His abode, and His pastimes. Unlike objects made of inert matter— which are separate from their names—the holy name is non-different from krishna. The holy name chanted by a pure devotee descends directly from the spiritual world, Goloka Vrndavana. It emanates directly from his soul, permeates his entire body, and dances on the tip of his tongue. One who chants like this is actually chanting the name; whereas he who nourishes a material the name; whereas he who nourishes a material concept of the holy name is lost.

      How Can the Eighth Offense be Rectified?

      If one commits this offense, it is advisable to go to the Vaisnavas and obtain sambandha-jnana1, in order to remove one's ignorance. One should avoid this mistake in the future and should start to chant seriously. After having spoken about the eighth offense, Haridasa Thakura addressed the following prayer to Lord Caitanya:

      My dear Lord, my thoughts and my intellect are thoroughly mun¬dane: therefore I simply mouth the names of the Lord. I am too un¬fortunate to experience the transcendental touchstone qualities of the holy name. O Lord: I beg You to please appear as the holy name and dance on my tongue. I fall at Your lotus feet and pray. If you like, You can keep me in this material world and deprive me of the spiritual sky; whatever You desire, You are free to fulfil. But please let me taste the divine nectar of krishna's holy name. You have incar¬nated amongst the jivas to distribute the holy name, so kindly also consider me, an insignificant jlva. I am a fallen soul and You are the savior of the fallen. Let this be our relationship. O Savior! On the strength of this relationship, I am begging from You the nectar of the holy name.2

      By cultivating such a humble and eager attitude, following in the footsteps of the namacarya, the eighth offense can surely be avoided.
  • hare krishna mataji,
    you don"t worry.you just pray to lord krishna and patitpavan gauranga mahaprabhu.i am sure that he will really bless you because he is vry kind

  • HARI BOL
    JAI NITAI GAURACHANDRA
    JAI ASRILA PRABHUAPDA
    MATA JI! JAI VAISHANAVAS
    IF YOU WANT SOME SCRIPTURES TO READ TO STICK TO SPIRITUAL LIFE, PLEASE DOWNLOAD AND VISIT:
    http://www.google.co.in/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&so...

    It is the duty of the wife to take charge of household affairs and not to compete with the husband
    SB 3.22.11, Purport: Two words are used in Sanskrit literature; one is grhastha, and the other is grhamedhi. The difference between grhamedhi and grhastha is that grhastha is also an asrama, or spiritual order, but if one simply satisfies his senses as a householder, then he is a grhamedhi. For a grhamedhi, to accept a wife means to satisfy the senses, but for a grhastha a qualified wife is an assistant in every respect for advancement in spiritual activities. It is the duty of the wife to take charge of household affairs and not to compete with the husband. A wife is meant to help, but she cannot help her husband unless he is completely equal to her in age, character and quality.
    But even if the husband is not a great devotee like Kardama Muni, it is the wife's duty to adapt herself according to his mentality
    SB 3.23.4-5, Purport: The wife is expected to be of the same category as the husband. She must be prepared to follow the principles of the husband, and then there will be happy life. If the husband is a devotee and the wife is materialistic, there cannot be any peace in the home. The wife must see the tendencies of the husband and must be prepared to follow him. From Mahabharata we learn that when Gandhari understood that her would-be husband, Dhrtarastra, was blind, she immediately began to practice blindness herself. Thus she covered her eyes and played the part of a blind woman. She decided that since her husband was blind, she must also act like a blind woman, otherwise she would be proud of her eyes, and her husband would be seen as inferior. The word samanuvrata indicates that it is the duty of a wife to adopt the special circumstances in which the husband is situated. Of course, if the husband is as great as Kardama Muni, then a very good result accrues from following him. But even if the husband is not a great devotee like Kardama Muni, it is the wife's duty to adapt herself according to his mentality. That makes married life very happy. It is also mentioned herein that by following the strict vows of a chaste woman, Princess Devahuti became very skinny, and therefore her husband became compassionate. He knew that she was the daughter of a great king and yet was serving him just like an ordinary woman. She was reduced in health by such activities, and he became compassionate and addressed her as follows.
    It is the duty of a faithful and chaste wife to help her husband in every respect, especially when the husband is engaged in Kṛṣṇa consciousness
    SB 3.23.6, Tanslation and Purport: Kardama Muni said: O respectful daughter of Svayambhuva Manu, today I am very much pleased with you for your great devotion and most excellent loving service. Since the body is so dear to embodied beings, I am astonished that you have neglected your own body to use it on my behalf. It is indicated here that one's body is very dear, yet Devahuti was so faithful to her husband that not only did she serve him with great devotion, service and respect, but she did not even care for her own health. That is called selfless service. It appears that Devahuti had no sense pleasure, even with her husband, otherwise she would not have deteriorated in health. Acting to facilitate Kardama Muni's engagement in spiritual elevation, she continually assisted him, not caring for bodily comfort. It is the duty of a faithful and chaste wife to help her husband in every respect, especially when the husband is engaged in Krsna consciousness. In this case, the husband also amply rewarded the wife. This is not to be expected by a woman who is the wife of an ordinary person.
    http://www.vaniquotes.org/wiki/Chaste_and_faithful_woman
    http://www.vaniquotes.org/wiki/Duty_of_the_wife
    SB Canto 4
    Mother Lakṣmījī, the goddess of fortune, is an ideal wife because she takes care of Lord Nārāyaṇa in every detail
    SB 4.20.28, Purport: Mother Lakṣmījī, the goddess of fortune, is well known for always massaging the lotus feet of Lord Nārāyaṇa. She is an ideal wife because she takes care of Lord Nārāyaṇa in every detail. She takes care not only of His lotus feet but of the household affairs of the Lord as well. She cooks nice foods for Him, fans Him while He eats, smoothes sandalwood pulp on His face and sets His bed and sitting places in the right order. In this way she is always engaged in the service of the Lord, and there is hardly any opportunity for any other devotee to intrude upon His daily activities.
    SB Canto 7
    A man should be an ideal servant of the Lord, and a woman should be an ideal wife like the goddess of fortune
    SB 7.11.29, Purport: The faithfulness of the goddess of fortune is the ideal for a chaste woman. The Brahma-saṁhitā (5.29) says, lakṣmī-sahasra-śata-sambhrama-sevyamānam. In the Vaikuṇṭha planets, Lord Viṣṇu is worshiped by many, many thousands of goddesses of fortune, and in Goloka Vṛndāvana, Lord Kṛṣṇa is worshiped by many, many thousands of gopīs, all of whom are goddesses of fortune. A woman should serve her husband as faithfully as the goddess of fortune. A man should be an ideal servant of the Lord, and a woman should be an ideal wife like the goddess of fortune. Then both husband and wife will be so faithful and strong that by acting together they will return home, back to Godhead, without a doubt.
    SB Canto 9
    As Lord Rāmacandra is the ideal husband, mother Sītā is the ideal wife
    SB 9.10.55, Purport: As Lord Rāmacandra is the ideal husband (eka-patnī-vrata), mother Sītā is the ideal wife. Such a combination makes family life very happy. Yad yad ācarati śreṣṭhas tat tad evetaro janaḥ: whatever example a great man sets, common people follow. If the kings, the leaders, and the brāhmaṇas, the teachers, would set forth the examples we receive from Vedic literature, the entire world would be heaven; indeed, there would no longer be hellish conditions within this material world.
    SB Cantos 10.14 to 12 (Translations Only)
    Concluding that Rukmiṇī would be an ideal wife for Him, Lord Kṛṣṇa made up His mind to marry her
    SB 10.52.24, Translation: Lord Kṛṣṇa knew that Rukmiṇī possessed intelligence, auspicious bodily markings, beauty, proper behavior and all other good qualities. Concluding that she would be an ideal wife for Him, He made up His mind to marry her.
    Other Books by Srila Prabhupada
    Krsna, The Supreme Personality of Godhead
    The sixteen thousand queens, headed by the goddess of fortune Rukmiṇīdevī, the ideal wife of Lord Kṛṣṇa, and accompanied by their respective sons, all followed behind Lord Kṛṣṇa
    Krsna Book 71: The chariot of Lord Kṛṣṇa started for Hastināpura accompanied by many other chariots, along with elephants, cavalry, infantry and similar royal paraphernalia. Bugles, drums, trumpets, conchshells and horns all produced a loud auspicious sound which vibrated in all directions. The sixteen thousand queens, headed by the goddess of fortune Rukmiṇīdevī, the ideal wife of Lord Kṛṣṇa, and accompanied by their respective sons, all followed behind Lord Kṛṣṇa.
    http://www.vaniquotes.org/wiki/Ideal_wife

    A faithful wife and spiritually trained brahmacārī are a good combination for advancement of the human mission.
    SB 3.14.17, Translation and Purport:

    O afflicted one, I shall forthwith gratify whatever desire is dear to you, for who else but you is the source of the three perfections of liberation?

    The three perfections of liberation are religiosity, economic development and sense gratification: For a conditioned soul, the wife is considered to be the source of liberation because she offers her service to the husband for his ultimate liberation. Conditional material existence is based on sense gratification, and if someone has the good fortune to get a good wife, he is helped by the wife in all respects. If one is disturbed in his conditional life, he becomes more and more entangled in material contamination. A faithful wife is supposed to cooperate with her husband in fulfilling all material desires so that he can then become comfortable and execute spiritual activities for the perfection of life. If, however, the husband is progressive in spiritual advancement, the wife undoubtedly shares in his activities, and thus both the wife and the husband profit in spiritual perfection. It is essential, therefore, that girls as well as boys be trained to discharge spiritual duties so that at the time of cooperation both will be benefited. The training of the boy is brahmacarya, and the training of the girl is chastity. A faithful wife and spiritually trained brahmacārī are a good combination for advancement of the human mission.
    There are so many instances of falldown, even for great yogīs like Viśvāmitra. A gṛhastha is saved, however, because of his faithful wife.
    SB 3.14.20, Translation and Purport:

    As a fort commander very easily conquers invading plunderers, by taking shelter of a wife one can conquer the senses, which are unconquerable in the other social orders.

    Of the four orders of human society—the student, or brahmacārī order, the householder, or gṛhastha order, the retired, or vānaprastha order, and the renounced, or sannyāsī order—the householder is on the safe side. The bodily senses are considered plunderers of the fort of the body. The wife is supposed to be the commander of the fort, and therefore whenever there is an attack on the body by the senses, it is the wife who protects the body from being smashed. The sex demand is inevitable for everyone, but one who has a fixed wife is saved from the onslaught of the sense enemies. A man who possesses a good wife does not create a disturbance in society by corrupting virgin girls. Without a fixed wife, a man becomes a debauchee of the first order and is a nuisance in society—unless he is a trained brahmacārī, vānaprastha or sannyāsī. Unless there is rigid and systematic training of the brahmacārī by the expert spiritual master, and unless the student is obedient, it is sure that the so-called brahmacārī will fall prey to the attack of sex. There are so many instances of falldown, even for great yogīs like Viśvāmitra. A gṛhastha is saved, however, because of his faithful wife. Sex life is the cause of material bondage, and therefore it is prohibited in three āśramas and is allowed only in the gṛhastha-āśrama. The gṛhastha is responsible for producing first-quality brahmacārīs, vānaprasthas and sannyāsīs.
    http://www.vaniquotes.org/wiki/Faithful_wife
    SB Canto 3
    The wife is accepted as the better half of a man's body because she is supposed to be responsible for discharging half of the duties of the husband.
    SB 3.14.19, Translation and Purport:

    O respectful one, a wife is so helpful that she is called the better half of a man's body because of her sharing in all auspicious activities. A man can move without anxiety entrusting all responsibilities to his wife.

    By the Vedic injunction, the wife is accepted as the better half of a man's body because she is supposed to be responsible for discharging half of the duties of the husband. A family man has a responsibility to perform five kinds of sacrifices, called pañca-yajña, in order to get relief from all kinds of unavoidable sinful reaction incurred in the course of his affairs. When a man becomes qualitatively like the cats and dogs, he forgets his duties in cultivating spiritual values, and thus he accepts his wife as a sense gratificatory agency. When the wife is accepted as a sense gratificatory agency, personal beauty is the main consideration, and as soon as there is a break in personal sense gratification, there is disruption or divorce. But when husband and wife aim at spiritual advancement by mutual cooperation, there is no consideration of personal beauty or the disruption of so-called love. In the material world there is no question of love. Marriage is actually a duty performed in mutual cooperation as directed in the authoritative scriptures for spiritual advancement. Therefore marriage is essential in order to avoid the life of cats and dogs, who are not meant for spiritual enlightenment.
    SB Canto 4
    Just as King Purañjana began to search out his better half, the Queen, one who is decorated with knowledge and instructions from saintly persons should try to search out his original consciousness, Kṛṣṇa consciousness.
    SB 4.26.12, Purport:

    When a man comes into good consciousness and accepts a saintly person as a spiritual master, he hears many Vedic instructions in the form of philosophy, stories, narrations about great devotees and transactions between God and His devotees. In this way a man becomes refreshed in mind, exactly like a person who smears scented sandalwood pulp all over his body and decorates himself with ornaments. These decorations may be compared to knowledge of religion and the self. Through such knowledge one becomes detached from a materialistic way of life and engages himself in always hearing Śrīmad-Bhāgavatam, Bhagavad-gītā and other Vedic literatures. The word sādhv-alaṅkṛta used in this verse indicates that one must be absorbed in knowledge gathered from the instructions of saintly persons. Just as King Purañjana began to search out his better half, the Queen, one who is decorated with knowledge and instructions from saintly persons should try to search out his original consciousness, Kṛṣṇa consciousness. One cannot return to Kṛṣṇa consciousness unless he is favored by the instructions of a saintly person. Therefore Śrīla Narottama dāsa Ṭhākura sings: sādhu-śāstra-guru-vākya, cittete kariyā aikya. If we want to become saintly persons, or if we want to return to our original Kṛṣṇa consciousness, we must associate with sādhu (a saintly person), śāstra (authoritative Vedic literature) and guru (a bona fide spiritual master). This is the process.
    SB Canto 6
    SB 6.18.30, Translation:

    In the beginning of creation, Lord Brahmā, the father of the living entities of the universe, saw that all the living entities were unattached. To increase population, he then created woman from the better half of man's body, for woman's behavior carries away a man's mind.
    SB Canto 7
    One's excessive attachment for his wife, by which one thinks his wife to be his better half or to be identical with himself, must gradually be given up.
    SB 7.14.11, Purport:

    The idea of giving even one's wife to the service of the public is that one's intimate relationship with his wife, or one's excessive attachment for his wife, by which one thinks his wife to be his better half or to be identical with himself, must gradually be given up. As formerly suggested, the idea of ownership, even of one's family, must be abandoned. The dream of material life is the cause of bondage in the cycle of birth and death, and therefore one should give up this dream. Consequently, in the human form of life one's attachment for his wife should be given up, as suggested herein.
    SB Canto 10.1 to 10.13
    SB 10.9.20, Translation:

    Neither Lord Brahmā, nor Lord Śiva, nor even the goddess of fortune, who is always the better half of the Supreme Lord, can obtain from the Supreme Personality of Godhead, the deliverer from this material world, such mercy as received by mother Yaśodā.
    Lectures
    Srimad-Bhagavatam Lectures
    So wife is considered better half.
    Lecture on SB 1.7.45-46 -- Vrndavana, October 5, 1976:

    So according to Vedic culture, if one woman has got son, she is not considered to be widow. Widow means one who hasn't got husband or husband is dead. So if the husband's representative is there, so, strictly speaking, she is not widow. So prajā-rūpeṇa vartate. Again the wife is considered ardhāṅginī. I think in English also it is said, "better half." Wife is considered half the body. The left hand side half... Perhaps you have seen the picture that Kṛṣṇa and Rādhārāṇī, one body. The left-hand side is Rādhārāṇī, right-hand side is Kṛṣṇa. Śrīla Jīva Gosvāmī has explained this, rādhā kṛṣṇa-praṇaya-vikṛtir hlādinī-śaktir asmād ekātmānāv api (CC Adi 1.5). Rādhā and Kṛṣṇa, They are one, but for pastimes they have become two. Ekātmānāv api bhuvi purā deha-bhedaṁ gatau tau. Again Rādhā-Kṛṣṇa united, caitanyākhyaṁ prakaṭam adhunā tad-dvayaṁ caikyam āptam. So these things are there. So wife is considered better half. Ardhāṅginī. So the ardhāṅginī is there, and the son is there. In so many ways they are convincing that "Do not think that Droṇācārya is dead and gone." He's (She's) convincing this point. "Droṇācārya is still existing. So killing the son of Droṇācārya means killing Droṇācārya. So do not do this." He's (She's) putting so many arguments.
    Festival Lectures
    Wife means better half. She must abide. Just like, it is said, just like a shadow follows the reality.
    Sri Rama-Navami, Lord Ramacandra's Appearance Day -- Hawaii, March 27, 1969:

    So then one of the brothers, Lakṣmaṇa, He also requested Rāmacandra, "My dear brother, You also take Me. I am Your constant companion. I must go with You." So He said, "That's Your wish. Voluntarily, if You want to come, You can come with Me." Then Sītā, His wife, young wife, She also said, "I'll go with You." Rāmacandra requested His wife, "Oh, you cannot go with Me. It is very difficult. You are a king's daughter, and you are brought up in so nice way, and you are so beautiful. You cannot go. You cannot take the trouble of living in the forest." So she said, "Oh, I am Your wife. Married wife. So I must go even if You go to hell." This is ideal wife. She could have refused: "Oh, Your father has ordered to go to forest. You can go. I shall go to my father's house or I shall remain here." No. This is ideal wife. She must be prepared to accept any circumstances of the husband. Not that when the husband is rich the wife is very faithful, and when he has come down to be poor or he's going to forest the wife gives up his company. No. Wife means better half. She must abide. Just like, it is said, just like a shadow follows the reality, similarly, the wife is the shadow of the husband. Wherever the husband goes, she must go. Whatever the husband wants, she must carry out. Of course, in this country this interpretation is taken differently, that wife is made a slave. But actually, it is not so.
    Initiation Lectures
    If their husband is a brāhmaṇa, she automatically becomes brāhmaṇa because wife is considered to be the half, better half.
    Initiation of Satyabhama Dasi and Gayatri Initiation of Devotees Going to London -- Montreal, July 26, 1968:

    So these ten kinds of offenses should be avoided and at least sixteen rounds you must chant. All the Gosvāmīs in Vṛndāvana, they had a limited, not limited, a number, fixed, that "So many times I shall chant." So we are offering only minimum of sixteen rounds. That, it will take, sixteen rounds, it will take about, utmost, three hours. So you should... Out of twenty-four hours, you should engage at least three hours for chanting. So then this is the beginning of initiation, and those who have chanted at least for one year, then the next initiation is to offer him Gāyatrī mantra. Some of the students, boys and girls, will be offered this Gāyatrī mantra. And when the Gāyatrī mantra is offered men, they are offered also sacred thread, and girls, they are not offered sacred thread. If their husband is a brāhmaṇa, she automatically becomes brāhmaṇa because wife is considered to be the half, better half. She is the better portion. So she automatically becomes better brāhmaṇa (laughter). So better brāhmaṇa does not require any thread. There is a Bengali proverb, ya va nauket poiyete darkana naya (?). The proverb is that in India if one has got sacred thread, he is immediately understood that he must be belonging to the higher caste, brāhmaṇa, kṣatriya, or vaiṣya. But if somebody knows that he is brāhmaṇa or kṣatriya, he doesn't require to show the sacred thread. Similarly, the wives of brāhmaṇa is already known that he (she) is brāhmaṇa, so she does not require to show the sacred thread. So don't be sorry because you will not be offered the sacred thread. That's all right.
    Philosophy Discussions
    The woman is known as his better half, so if she looks after the comfort of the man, a man is working and he is looking after the comfort, then both will be satisfied and their spiritual life will progress.
    Philosophy Discussion on Auguste Comte:

    In childhood the protection is from the father, in youthhood the protection is from the husband, and in old age the protection is from the grown-up sons. So they should never be given independence. They should be given protection, and their natural love for father or for husband or for children, then that propensity will grow very smoothly, and that will establish the relationship with woman and man very happy, and both of them will be able to execute their real function, spiritual life, by cooperation. The woman is known as his better half, so if she looks after the comfort of the man, a man is working and he is looking after the comfort, then both will be satisfied and their spiritual life will progress. Woman is meant for certain duties; man is meant for... Man is meant for hard working, and woman is meant for homely comfort, love. So both of them, if they are situated in their respective duties under proper training, then this combination of man and woman will help both of them to make progress in spiritual life.
    Correspondence
    1971 Correspondence
    As his wife, you are his better half and it is your duty to help him in every way possible.
    Letter to Caitanya -- Bombay, India 11 June, 1971:

    So you should see to it that the trinidad center becomes a grand success. So you must give your good husband all assistance so that he can do things nicely. that is you duty. As his wife, you are his better half and it is your duty to help him in every way possible. So first of all you must keep yourself fit in Krishna Consciousness. the means are simple. Strictly follow the regulative principles, regularly chant at least 16 rounds of beads daily, and without fail; read all our books and discuss them with your husband; go out for preaching regularly. In this way always keep engaged in Krishna's service with enthusiasm and faith in Krishna, and He will give you all facility for developing Trinidad center very nicely.
    Give him all encouragement and assistance to execute Krishna Consciousness nicely there in Gainesville, Florida. That is your duty as wife, the better half of the husband. So do it nicely.
    Letter to Anangamanjari (Elaine) -- Los Angeles 5 July, 1971:

    I am so glad to hear how you are strictly following the regulative principles, chanting at least 16 rounds of beads daily, and associating with devotees exclusively for the past year. That is our very strength in spiritual life, and if you continue to do so, then your rapid advancement in Krishna Consciousness is certain. Read our books, attend classes and go for street Sankirtana and in this way engage yourself in Krishna's business 24 hours. That is my request. Then you will be happy and your life will be a success. And you have got such an intelligent and enthusiastic husband. He is a good boy, I know. So give him all encouragement and assistance to execute Krishna Consciousness nicely there in Gainesville, Florida. That is your duty as wife, the better half of the husband. So do it nicely.
    You are your husband's better half and as such it is your duty to assist him in every way possible so that he can nicely execute Krishna Consciousness.
    Letter to Tilaka (Evalyn) -- Los Angeles 5 July, 1971:

    So now you have taken to Krishna Consciousness wholeheartedly and I am so pleased to hear how enthusiastic you are for serving the Spiritual Master and for serving your husband also. That is your duty. You are your husband's better half and as such it is your duty to assist him in every way possible so that he can nicely execute Krishna Consciousness. Especially Makhanlal has taken charge of our Seattle temple and that is a big responsibility, so you must give him all assistance and all encouragement.
    http://www.google.co.in/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&ved=0CCsQFjAA&url=http%3A%…
    • Hare Krsna Shubham Prabhuji,

      Thanks for clearing my long pending doubt. You said, 

      'We have to follow Gaudiya Vaishanava Acharyas after 1200AD for they appeared in same yuga and conditions."

      Can you give me their names so that I can read more about them?

      Haribol

      • Sadhu Vritti Excerpt

        For example, let us consider the statement: Some mahatma has said (Shrila Narottama dasa Thakura from Prema-bhakti-candrika): mahajanera yei patha, ta 'te ha 'ba anurata, purvapara kariya vicara—“I will be attached to the path chalked out by the previous and later mahajanas.” The rishis and mahatmas who have taught conduct before the appearance of Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu are counted among the previous mahajanas. The conduct seen in the mahajanas after the appearance of Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu is the conduct of later mahajanas. The conduct of the later mahajanas is superior and should be adopted. The conduct of Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and His followers is meant to teach people, so that conduct should be followed in all respects.

         

        Shrila Madhavendra Puri

        Lord Nityananda Prabhu, Shrila Ishvara Puri, Lord Advaita Acharya

        Lord Gauranga Mahaprabhu, Shri Shachi-devi, Shrila Jagannatha Mishra, Shri Lakshmipriya-devi, Shri Vishnupriya-devi, Shri Jahnavi-devi, Shri Vasudha-devi, Shrila Haridasa Thakura, Shrila Yadunandana, Shrila Gauridasa Pandita, Shrila Vrindavana dasa

        Shrila Shivananda Sena, Shrila Prabodhananda, Shrila Shrivasa Thakura, Shrila Virabhadra, Shrila Pundarika Vidyanidhi, Shrila Svarupa Damodara, Shrila Ramananda Raya, Shrila Narahari Sarakara, Shrila Jagadananda, Shrila Murari Gupta, Shrila Sarvabhauma, Shrila Lokanatha, Shrila Hridaya Chaitanya, Shrila Sanatana, Shrila Rupa, Shrila Raghunatha dasa, Shrila Raghunatha Bhatta

        Shri Gadadhara Pandita, Shrila Gopala Bhatta, Shrila Jiva, Shrila Krishnadasa Kaviraja, Shrila Kavi Karnapura, Shrila Lochana dasa

        Shrila Shrinivasa Acharya, Shrila Narottama, Shrila Shyamananda

        Shrila Ganganarayana Chakravarti, Shrila Rasikananda, Shrila Krishnacharana Chakravarti, Shrila Radha Ramana Chakravarti, Shrila Vishvanatha Chakravarti, Shrila Baladeva Vidyabhushana, Shrila Narahari Chakravarti, Shrila Uddhava dasa, Shrila Madhusudana dasa, Shrila Jagannatha dasa, Shrila Sacchidananda Bhaktivinoda Thakura, Shrila Gaura Kishore dasa, Shrila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakura Prabhupada, Shrila A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada

         

        From Madhvendra Puri to now.

        JAI ACHARYAS JAI VAISHNAVAS

        HARI BOL

        MATA JI!

        NITYANANDA GAURANGA

        • Hare Krsna Prabhuji,

          Thanks for the information. will try to read more about them... It is for my conviction that I wish to know and get direct scriptural references (Shastras) stating one man- one wife couple as ideal. Can you please help me in this by providing convincing scriptural references in simple terms? I know you have provided earlier... but somehow I not convinced. It says it depends on Yuga, then time, place and circumstance. So what is the standard ideal form? Dharma

          Haribol

    • Sadhu vritti from Bhaktyaloka By Bhaktivinoda Thakura

      Excerpt

      What is proper occupation? To know this, one should see the behavior of Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu's followers. As far as possible I will try to briefly compile them in this essay. First I will write about the behavior and occupation of the grihastha, as found in the character of Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and His devotees.
      As a support for his devotional service, a householder should find a suitable wife. In the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Adi 15.26-27) the Lord says:
      grihastha ha-ilama, ebe cahi griha-dharma
      grihini vina griha-dharma na haya shobhana
      “Since I am remaining at home it is My duty to act as a grihastha. Without a wife, there is no meaning to householder life.”
      While living with one's wife and maintaining religious family life, Krishna's servants and maidservants are born in the form of sons and daughters. Nourishing them is called maintaining the family. The pious acquisition of wealth is required in these activities. In this regard Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu has said in the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Antya 5.41) and Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 15.96):
      prabhu bale,—parivara aneka tomara
      nirvaha kemate tabe haibe sabara?
      `grihastha' hayena inho, cahiye sancaya
      sancaya na kaile kutumba-bharana nahi haya
      “The Lord said: There are so many members in your family. How will you maintain everyone? Being a householder, one needs to save some money. Because he is not doing so, it is very difficult for him to maintain his family.”
      One must be educated at a proper age. But he should not study atheistic literatures. In the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Adi 12.49 and Madhya 9.241-242) the Lord says:
      pade kene loka?—krishna bhakti janibare
      se yadi nahila, tabe vidyaya ki kare?
      vishaya-madandha saba kichui na jane
      vidya-made, dhana-made vaishnava na cine
      bhagavata padiyao ka 'ro buddhi nasha
      “Why do people study? Education is only for understanding devotional service of Lord Krishna. If you miss this point, then what is the use of your education? Everyone is blinded by pride and sense gratification. Being proud of their education and wealth, they fail to recognize a Vaishnava. If one studies Shrimad Bhagavatam improperly his intelligence is polluted.”
      Serving guests is the principle duty of a grihastha—this is the Lord's instruction. In the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Adi 14.21, 26) it is stated:
      grihasthere mahaprabhu shikhayena dharma
      atithira seva—grihasthera mula-karma
      akaitave citta-sukhe ya 'ra yena shakti
      taha karilei bali atithite bhakti
      “In this way the Lord satisfied all His guests and taught the world how to behave as a perfect householder. The foremost duty of a householder is to serve his guests. If a householder happily serves his guests without duplicity and according to his ability he is considered hospitable.”
      A grihastha should act with simplicity in his dealings with people; he should not allow any kind of cheating or duplicity in his heart. In the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Adi 14.142) the Lord says:
      ataeva grihe tumi krishna bhaja giya
      kutinati parihari' ekanta haiya
      “Therefore go back to your home and worship Lord Krishna with full attention, giving up all duplicity.”
      It is the principle duty of a grihastha to serve senior persons. In the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Adi 15.21) the Lord says:
      grihastha ha-iya kariba pita-matara sevana
      ihate-i tushta habena lakshmi-narayana
      “Later I shall become a householder and thus serve My parents, for this action will very much satisfy Lord Narayana and His wife, the goddess of fortune.”
      A householder should take the principles of renunciation to heart; but he should not simply dress as a renunciate. As stated by the Lord in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 16.237-239):
      sthira hana ghare yao, na hao vatula
      krame krame paya loka bhava-sindhu-kula
      markata-vairagya na kara loka dekhana
      yatha-yogya vishaya bhunja' anasakta hana
      antare nishtha kara, bahye loka-vyavahara
      acirat krishna tomaya karibe uddhara
      “Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu said: Be patient and return home. Don't be a crazy fellow. By and by you will be able to cross the ocean of material existence. You should not make yourself a showbottle devotee and become a false renunciate. For the time being, enjoy the material world in a befitting way and do not become attached to it. Within your heart, you should keep yourself very faithful, but externally you may behave like an ordinary man. Thus Krishna will soon be very pleased and deliver you from the clutches of maya.”
      A householder is duty-bound to work for the benefit of everyone. In the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Adi 9.41, 7.92) the Lord said:
      bharata-bhumite haila manushya-janma yara
      janma sarthaka kari' kara para-upakara
      naca, gao, bhakta-sange kara sankirtana
      krishna-nama upadeshi' tara' sarva-jana
      “One who has taken his birth as a human being in the land of India (Bharata-varsha) should make his life successful and work for the benefit of all other people. My dear child, continue dancing, chanting, and performing sankirtana in association with devotees. Furthermore, go out and preach the value of chanting krishna-nama, for by this process You will be able to deliver all fallen souls.”
      In this practice of devotional service, duplicitous association has been prohibited. Even in street sankirtana one should chant and dance in the association of pure devotees. One should not chant in the association of nondevotees.
      A householder should fully depend on the will of the Lord in all his activities. The Lord says in the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Madhya 28.55):
      shuna mata, ishvarera adhina samsara
      svatantra haite shakti nahika kahara
      “Listen, dear mother, the whole world is under the control of the Lord. No one has the power to become independent.”
      A householder should cautiously give up the association of nondevotees, women, and uxorious people. In the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 22.87) the Lord said:
      asat-sanga-tyaga,—ei vaishnava-acara
      `stri-sangi'—eka asadhu, `krishnabhakta' ara
      “A Vaishnava should always avoid the association of ordinary people. Common people are very much materially attached, especially to women. Vaishnavas should also avoid the company of those who are not devotees of Lord Krishna.”
      By following his prescribed duties a grihastha Vaishnava should accumulate wealth for his maintenance. He should not accumulate wealth by sinful means. Lord Nityananda Prabhu has stated in the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Antya 5.685-688):
      shuna dvija, yateka pataka kaili tui
      ara yadi na karis, saba nimu muni
      parahimsa, daka, curi—saba anacara
      chada giya, iha tumi na kariha ara
      dharma pathe giya tumi laha hari-nama
      tabe tumi anyere kariba paritrana
      yata saba dasyu, cora dakiya aniya
      dharma-pathe sabare laoyao tumi giya
      “Now listen carefully, O brahmana. I will take responsibility for all your previous misdeeds if you do not repeat them. No more aggression, violence, looting, or murder; give them up forever. Lead a religious life and chant the holy names of the Supreme Lord. Then later you can also save others. Go and meet other dacoits and murderers and bring them to the path of pure religious life.”
      A householder should not hanker for another's wife or prostitutes. This is exhibited in the Lord's dealings with Krishnadasa in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 9.227-228):
      gosanira sange rahe krishnadasa brahmana
      bhattathari-saha tahan haila darashana
      stri-dhana dekhana tanra lobha janmaila
      arya sarala viprera buddhi-nasha kaila
      “Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu was accompanied by His servant, Krishnadasa. He was a brahmana, but he met with the Bhattatharis there. With women the Bhatöatharis allured the brahmana Krishnadasa, who was simple and gentle. By virtue of their bad association, they polluted his intelligence.”
      The Lord protected that brahmana from the women's clutches by pulling him by the hair. The words sarala vipra mean a weak-hearted young brahmana.
      He is a real householder who chants one hundred thousand names every day. Pure devotees should accept prasada in the houses of such grihasthas. In the Chaitanya-bhagavata (9.121-2) the Lord said:
      prabhu bale,—jana, `laksheshvara' bali kare?
      prati-dina laksha-nama ye grahana kare
      se janera nama ami bali `laksheshvara'
      tatha bhiksha amara, na yai anya ghara
      “The Lord replied: Do you know who is a laksheshvara? He is someone who chants one laksha, or one hundred thousand, holy names everyday. I call such a person a laksheshvara. I only take meals in that person's house, no one else.”
      There is no difference between smartas and Vaishnavas regarding following the codes of religion. The Lord has said in the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Antya 9.388-9):
      adhama janera ye acara, yena dharma
      adhikari vaishnaveo kare sei karma
      krishna kripaye se iha janibare pare
      e saba sankaöe keha mare, keha tare
      “Sometimes an exalted Vaishnava exhibits the same activities as a materialistic person. One can understand this by the mercy of Krishna; otherwise in this dilemma one may be liberated or destroyed.”
      The purport is that the conviction in the heart of a Vaishnava is independent. If one is a Vaishnava, then he can understand the conviction in the heart of another Vaishnava who is engaged in the same activities as those of the smartas. One who cannot understand this cannot respect Vaishnavas, and he thereby goes to hell.
      The Lord has explained the duties of householders in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 15.104):
      prabhu kahena—`krishna-seva', `vaishnava-sevana'
      `nirantara kara krishna-nama-sankirtana'
      “Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu replied: Without cessation continue chanting the holy name of Lord Krishna. Whenever possible, serve Him and His devotees, the Vaishnavas.”
      It is the duty of a grihastha to constantly chant the holy names of the Lord and serve the Vaishnavas and the Lord with the help of his relatives and by the wealth he has earned through his pious life. Regarding serving the Vaishnavas, one should know that there are three types of nonduplicitous devotees. Serving such Vaishnavas is called vaishnava-seva. There is no need to gather many Vaishnavas by invitation. Whenever a Vaishnava comes for any purpose he should be properly served with care. By gathering many Vaishnavas, one may commit offenses. As stated in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 15.198):
      bahuta sannyasi yadi aise eka öhani
      sammana karite nari, aparadha pai
      “If all the sannyasis come together, it would not be possible for me to pay them proper respects. Therefore I would be an offender.”
      It is the duty of a grihastha Vaishnava to show mercy on the poor and fallen. As stated in Chaitanya-caritamrita (Antya 3.238):
      dine daya kare,—ei sadhu-svabhava haya
      “It is a characteristic of all saintly persons to be kind toward the poor and fallen.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava should not desire to give up his body merely out of some sentiment or anger. As stated by the Lord in Chaitanya-caritamrita (Antya 4.57):
      deha-tyagadi yata, saba—tamo-dharma
      tamo-rajo-dharme krishnera na paiye marma
      “Acts such as suicide are influenced by the mode of ignorance, and in ignorance and passion one cannot understand who Krishna is.”
      There is no consideration of superior or inferior status due to social position in regard to worshiping Krishna. In worldly occupations there are different activities according to the different social divisions, which are due to superior and inferior grades of intelligence. There are no such distinctions in the process of devotional service. As confirmed by the Lord in Chaitanya-caritamrita (Antya 4.66-67):
      nica-jati nahe krishna-bhajane ayogya
      sat-kula-vipra nahe bhajanera yogya
      yei bhaje sei bada, abhakta—hina, chara
      krishna-bhajane nahi jati-kuladi-vicara
      “A person born in a low family is not unfit for discharging devotional service to Lord Krishna, nor is one fit for devotional service simply because he is born in an aristocratic family of brahmanas. Anyone who takes to devotional service is exalted, whereas a nondevotee is always condemned and abominable. Therefore in the discharge of devotional service to the Lord, there is no consideration of the status of one's family.”
      Also in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Antya 5.84) it is said:
      sannyasi pandita-ganera karite garva nasha
      nica-shudra-dvara karena dharmera prakasha
      “To vanquish the false pride of so-called renunciates and learned scholars, He spreads real religious principles, even through a shudra, or lowborn fourth-class man.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava should feel satisfied with whatever food and clothing he gets without difficulty. As stated in the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Antya 4.293):
      saba' haite bhagyavanta—shri shaka, vyanjana
      punah punah yaha prabhu karena grahana
      “The spinach and vegetables are the most fortunate of all, for the Lord accepts them again and again.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava should perform devotional service with undeviated attention, knowing Krishna as the Lord of all. He should not disrespect the demigods worshiped by the smarta-sampradaya. As stated in Shri Chaitanya-bhagavata (Antya 2.243):
      na mane' chaitanya-patha, bolaya `vaishnava'
      shivere amanya kare vyartha ta 'ra saba
      “If one claims to be a Vaishnava, but he disrespects Lord Siva and does not strictly follow the path exhibited by Lord Chaitanya, all his efforts are futile.”
      It is the duty of a grihastha to work for the benefit of others even by giving up his own self-interest. In the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Antya 3.365) it is said:
      apanara bhala hau yete jana dekhe
      sujana apana chadiyao para rakhe
      “Some people expect only benefits for themselves, but a gentleman cares for others while giving up his own interest.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava should respect and worship tulasi. As stated in Shri Chaitanya-bhagavata (Antya 8.159-160):
      sankhya nama laite ye sthane prabhu vaise
      tathai rakhena tulasire prabhu pashe
      tulasire dekhena, japena sankhya-nama
      e bhakti-yogera tattva ke bujhibe ana?
      “Wherever the Lord sits to chant His rounds, He keeps tulasi before Him. He gazes at tulasi while He chants His rounds. Who can understand the science of devotional service?”
      A householder with devotion is glorious, while a householder without devotion is insignificant. Whatever social dealings a householder has to perform should be done while taking shelter of the holy name of Krishna. Regarding the character of the mahajana Shri Kalidasa, the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Antya 16.6-7) states:
      maha-bhagavata tenho sarala udara
      krishna-nama-`sankete' calaya vyavahara
      kautukete tenho yadi pashaka khelaya
      `hare krishna' `krishna' kari' pashaka calaya
      “Kalidasa was a very advanced devotee, yet he was simple and liberal. He would chant the holy name of Krishna while performing all his ordinary dealings. When he used to throw dice in jest, he would throw the dice while chanting Hare Krishna.”
      Everyone is prohibited from corrupt earning or spending, and workers are prohibited from accepting bribes. As stated by the Lord in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Antya 9.90, 142-144):
      rajara vartana khaya, ara curi kare
      raja-dandya haya sei shastrera vicare
      `vyaya na kariha kichu rajara mula-dhana'
      rajara mula-dhana diya ye kichu labhya haya
      sei dhana kariha nana dharme-karme vyaya
      asad-vyaya na kariha,—yate dui-loka yaya
      “One who serves the government but misappropriates the government's revenue is liable to be punished by the king. That is the verdict of all revealed scriptures. Do not spend any of the King's revenue. First you should pay the revenue due the King, and then you may spend the balance for religious and fruitive activities. Don't spend a farthing for sinful activities for which you will be the loser both in this life and the next.”
      A grihastha should accept a spiritual master who is full of devotion and of pure character. As stated in Shri Chaitanya-bhagavata (Madhya 21.65):
      guru yatha bhakti-shunya, tatha shishyagana
      “As the guru is without devotion, so are the disciples.”
      A householder should be particularly careful not to commit offenses against the Vaishnavas. In the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Madhya 22.33) the Lord says:
      ye vaishnava-sthane aparadha haya ya 'ra
      punah sei kshamile se ghuce, nahe ara
      “When someone offends a Vaishnava, he is not relieved until he is forgiven by that same Vaishnava.”
      Serving devotees is a householder's main duty. As stated in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Antya 16.57, 60):
      vaishnavera shesha-bhakshanera eteka mahima
      kalidase paoyaila prabhura kripa-sima
      bhakta-pada-dhuli ara bhakta-pada-jala
      bhakta-bhukta-avashesha—tina maha-bala
      “Taking the remnants of the Vaishnavas' food is so valuable that it induced Shri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu to offer Kalidasa His supreme mercy. The dust of the feet of a devotee, the water that has washed the feet of a devotee, and the remnants of food left by a devotee are three very powerful substances.”
      In the Shrimad Bhagavatam (11.20.27-8) Lord Krishna describes how a householder should act until his natural propensity for enjoying sense objects is overcome and he fully attains the characteristics of a pure devotee:
      jata-shraddho mat-kathasu nirvinnah sarva-karmasu
      veda duhkhatmakan kaman parityage 'py anishvarah
      tato bhajeta mam pritah shraddhalur dridha-nishcayah
      jushamanash ca tan kaman duhkhodarkamsh ca garhayan
      “Having awakened faith in the narrations of My glories, being disgusted with all material activities, knowing that all sense gratification leads to misery, but still being unable to renounce all sense enjoyment, My devotee remains happy and worships Me with great faith and conviction. Even though he is sometimes engaged in sense enjoyment, My devotee knows that all sense gratification leads to a miserable result, and he sincerely repents such activities.”
      When a householder has faith, he should take initiation into the chanting of the Hare Krishna maha-mantra. As stated in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 22.64):
      shraddhavan jana haya bhakti-adhikari
      `uttama', `madhyama', `kanishöha'—shraddha-anusari
      “A faithful devotee is a truly eligible candidate for the loving service of the Lord. According to one's faith, one is classified as a topmost devotee, an intermediate devotee, or an inferior devotee.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava must gradually acquire all the qualities mentioned in Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 22.78-80):
      kripalu, akrita-droha, satya-sara sama
      nidosha, vadanya, mridu, shuci, akincana
      sarvopakaraka, shanta, krishnaika-sharana
      akama, aniha, sthira, vijita-shad-guna
      mita-bhuk, apramatta, manada, amani
      gambhira, karuna, maitra, kavi, daksha, mauni
      “Devotees are always merciful, humble, truthful, equal to all, faultless, magnanimous, mild, and clean. They are without material possessions, and they perform welfare work for everyone. They are peaceful, surrendered to Krishna, and desireless. They are indifferent to material acquisitions and fixed in devotional service. They completely control the six bad qualities—lust, anger, greed, and so forth. They eat only as much as required, and they are not inebriated. They are respectful, grave, compassionate, and without false prestige. They are friendly, poetic, expert, and silent.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava should be eager to associate with advanced devotees. In the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 22.83) it is stated:
      krishna-bhakti-janma-mula haya `sadhu-sanga'
      “The root cause of devotional service to Lord Krishna is association with advanced devotees.”
      Out of all the processes of devotional service, one should give earnest attention to the five limbs mentioned in Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 22.128-129) as follows:
      sadhu-sanga, nama-kirtana, bhagavata-shravana
      mathura-vasa, shri-murtira shraddhaya sevana
      sakala-sadhana-shreshöha ei panca anga
      krishna-prema janmaya ei pancera alpa sanga
      “One should associate with devotees, chant the holy name of the Lord, hear Shrimad-Bhagavatam, reside at Mathura, and worship the Deity with faith and veneration. These five limbs of devotional service are the best of all. Even a slight performance of these five awakens love for Krishna.”
      Gradually one should diminish the following of prescribed rules out of obligation and cultivate spontaneous attachment. When spontaneous attachment to the Lord is awakened, many prescriptions are automatically discarded and atonement becomes needless. The difference is described in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 22.140, 142-143) as follows:
      kama tyaji' krishna bhaje shastra-ajna mani'
      deva-rishi-pitradikera kabhu nahe rini
      vidhi-dharma chadi' bhaje krishnera carana
      nishiddha papacare tara kabhu nahe mana
      ajnane va haya yadi `papa' upasthita
      krishna tanre shuddha kare, na karaya prayashcitta
      “If a person gives up all material desires and completely engages in the transcendental loving service of Krishna, as enjoined in revealed scriptures, he is never indebted to demigods, sages, or forefathers. Although the pure devotee does not follow all the regulative principles of varnashrama, he worships the lotus feet of Krishna. Therefore he naturally has no tendency to commit sin. If, however, a devotee accidentally becomes involved in a sinful activity, Krishna purifies him. He does not have to undergo the regulative form of atonement.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava should not endeavor for any knowledge or renunciation other than knowledge of one's relationship with the Lord in devotional service and renunciation born from devotional service. If one begins the worship of Krishna with special care and eagerness, then he achieves all auspiciousness. As stated in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 22.145):
      jnana-vairagyadi—bhaktira kabhu nahe `anga'
      ahimsa-yama-niyamadi bule krishna-bhakta-sanga
      “The path of speculative knowledge and renunciation is not very essential for devotional service. Indeed, good qualities such as nonviolence and mind and sense control automatically accompany a devotee of Lord Krishna.”
      The gradations of devotion to Lord Krishna are stated in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Madhya 23.10-13). One should cultivate them as follows:
      sadhu-sanga haite haya `shravana-kirtana'
      sadhana-bhaktye haya `sarvanartha-nivartana'
      anartha-nivritti haile bhaktye `nishöha' haya
      nishöha haite shravanadye `ruci' upajaya
      ruci haite bhaktye haya `asakti' pracura
      asakti haite citte janme krishne prity-ankura
      sei `bhava' gadha haile dhare `prema'-nama
      sei prema—`prayojana' sarvananda-dhama
      “When one is encouraged in devotional service by the association of devotees, one becomes free from all unwanted contamination by following the regulative principles and chanting and hearing. When one is freed from all unwanted contamination, he advances with firm faith. When firm faith in devotional service awakens, a taste for hearing and chanting also awakens. After taste is awakened, a deep attachment arises, and from that attachment the seed of love for Krishna grows in the heart. When that ecstatic emotional stage intensifies, it is called love of Godhead. Such love is life's ultimate goal and the reservoir of all pleasure.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava should constantly chant the holy names while carefully giving up the ten offenses. As stated in the Chaitanya-caritamrita (Antya 4.70-71):
      bhajanera madhye shreshöha nava-vidha bhakti
      `krishna-prema', `krishna' dite dhare maha-shakti
      tara madhye sarva-shreshöha nama-sankirtana
      niraparadhe nama laile paya prema-dhana
      “Among the ways of executing devotional service, the nine prescribed methods are the best, for these processes have great potency to deliver Krishna and ecstatic love for Him. Of the nine processes of devotional service, the most important is to always chant the holy name of the Lord. If one does so, avoiding the ten kinds of offenses, one very easily obtains the most valuable love of Godhead.”
      A householder should accept pure devotional service that is not based simply on religious sentiments. In the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Madhya 23.41) the Lord states:
      mora nritya dekhite uhara kon shakti?
      payah pan karile ki mote haya bhakti?
      “What qualification does he have to watch My dancing? By drinking milk can one attain devotion for Me?”
      The mood of servitude is proper for a living entity, and the mood of being lord is detrimental. As stated in the Chaitanya-bhagavata (Madhya 23.480, 482):
      udara-bharana lagi' ebe papi saba
      laoyaya `ishvara ami'—mule jaradgava
      kukkurera bhakshya deha—ihare laiya
      balaye `ishvara' vishnu-maya mugdha haiya
      “All sinful persons claim to be God in order to fill their bellies, although factually they are idiots. Accepting the material body, which is meant to be eaten by the dogs, they call themselves God under the influence by Lord Vishnu's external energy.”
      A grihastha Vaishnava should model his character after that of Lord Chaitanya and His followers. A householder should follow the ways of life and obtain his means of livelihood as exhibited by Lord Chaitanya and His followers. If one desires Krishna in all his activities, then those activities are auspicious. By endeavoring to gratify one's senses and attain irrelevant fruits, one becomes a materialist. For a devotee, to remain a householder or to become a renunciate is the same thing. Shrila Ramananda Raya, Shri Pundarika Vidyanidhi, Shri Shrivasa Pandita, Shri Shivananda Sena, Shri Satyaraja Khan, and Shri Advaita Prabhu were all grihasthas and have shown us the way of faultless living. The difference between a householder and a renunciate is due to their different means of livelihood. If the home is favorable for a devotee's devotional service, then he should not leave. It is his duty to remain a grihastha with detachment. But when the home becomes unfavorable for his service, he then becomes eligible to leave home. At that time the detachment he develops for his house through his devotional service is accepted. For this reason, Shrivasa Pandita did not leave home. For this reason, Svarupa Damodara took sannyasa. All genuine devotees have remained either at home or in the forest due to this consideration. Whoever has left home due to this consideration is called a genuine renunciate. He is always careful not to commit offenses against the holy name.

    • 1971 Correspondence

      The criss-cross pattern is simply decoration. After mopping the floor nicely, this kind of painting with colored rice powder is still prevailing in Hindu families of S. India. It is called alipna, or in other words after cleansing the rooms and floors such kind of auspicious paintings are done every morning or in every ceremony. In Bhagavad-gita is is said that they are part and parcel of religious life. In most cases these engagements are meant for the women.
      Letter to Satsvarupa -- London 25 August, 1971:

      Please accept my blessings. I am in due receipt of your letter dated 16th August, 1971 and have noted the contents. Also I have received your tape recording and have listened to the marriage institution very nicely. So far your questions:

      In the vedic ceremony the paraphernalia required for the sacrificial ceremony includes five kinds of powder, five kinds of leaves, five kinds of cow products, five kinds of grains and five kinds of jewels. So these are required for offering to the sacrifice: Five items of five kinds. So because we cannot collect all these things conveniently, we simply are satisfied with five kinds of powders. In the vedic system also when eatables are offered to somebody, five varieties of dishes are offered. Another significance of the vedic system is that arbitration is also made of five men. So this "five" is mentioned in many places. Just like in devotional service. Narada has written also five kinds of literatures; They are called Narada pancaratra. So it is traditional vedic system. What for they were made in routine in terms of "five" that is very difficult to find out but traditionally it is followed by vedic disciples as far as possible.

      The criss-cross pattern is simply decoration. After mopping the floor nicely, this kind of painting with colored rice powder is still prevailing in Hindu families of S. India. It is called alipna, or in other words after cleansing the rooms and floors such kind of auspicious paintings are done every morning or in every ceremony. In Bhagavad-gita is is said that they are part and parcel of religious life. In most cases these engagements are meant for the women. Women must be engaged otherwise they will be inclined to think of sex only. They are called kamini. Unless there is sufficient engagement their only thoughts will be concentrated on sex. As men are engaged in devotional service, similarly women are engaged in ritualistic engagements so that household life becomes very auspicious. These things are at the present moment impossible to perform regularly. Lord Caitanya therefore recommended Harer nama iva kevalam. Practically also we see our students being engaged in chanting Hare Krishna Mantra keeping free of all contamination. The vedic system takes especially care of women from illicit sex life. Illicit sex life is so dangerous that it produces unwanted children who create hellish life as described in Bhagavad-gita. In this age, all over the world, the sex indulgence is being unrestricted and religious principles are not being followed. The population is increasing with unwanted children like hippies. So these systems are very scientific but it is very

      (PAGE MISSING)

      SB Canto 4

      The words bhartur vrata-dharma-niṣṭhayā indicate that a woman's duty, or religious principle, is to serve her husband in all conditions.
      SB 4.23.20, Translation and Purport: Although she was not accustomed to such difficulties, Queen Arci followed her husband in the regulative principles of living in the forest like great sages. She lay down on the ground and ate only fruits, flowers and leaves, and because she was not fit for these activities, she became frail and thin. Yet because of the pleasure she derived in serving her husband, she did not feel any difficulties. The words bhartur vrata-dharma-niṣṭhayā indicate that a woman's duty, or religious principle, is to serve her husband in all conditions. In Vedic civilization a man is taught from the beginning of his life to become a brahmacārī, then an ideal gṛhastha, then vānaprastha, then sannyāsī, and the wife is taught just to follow the husband strictly in all conditions of life. After the period of brahmacarya, a man accepts a householder's life, and the woman is also taught by her parents to be a chaste wife. Thus when a girl and boy are united, both are trained for a life dedicated to a higher purpose. The boy is trained to execute his duty in accordance with the higher purpose of life, and the girl is trained to follow him. The chaste wife's duty is to keep her husband pleased in householder life in all respects, and when the husband retires from family life, she is to go to the forest and adopt the life of vānaprastha, or vana-vāsī. At that time the wife is to follow her husband and take care of him, just as she took care of him in householder life. But when the husband takes the renounced order of life, namely sannyāsa, the wife is to return home and become a saintly woman, setting an example for her children and daughters-in-law and showing them how to live a life of austerity.

      SB Canto 6

      A woman's duty is to be very chaste and faithful to her husband. Then without separate endeavor she will share in all the profit the husband earns.
      SB 6.6.1, Purport: After the incidents concerning the loss of his many sons, Dakṣa repented his misunderstanding with Nārada Muni. Lord Brahmā then saw Dakṣa and instructed him to beget children again. This time Dakṣa was very cautious to beget female children instead of male children so that Nārada Muni would not disturb them by urging them to accept the renounced order. Females are not meant for the renounced order of life; they should be faithful to their good husbands, for if a husband is competent for liberation, his wife will also achieve liberation with him. As stated in the śāstra, the results of a husband's pious activities are shared by his wife. Therefore a woman's duty is to be very chaste and faithful to her husband. Then without separate endeavor she will share in all the profit the husband earns.

      SB Canto 7

      Although the duties of a woman are different from those of a man, a chaste woman is not meant to serve a fallen husband
      SB 7.11.28, Purport: Specifically, if one is not a soul surrendered to the Supreme Personality of Godhead, he is understood to be contaminated. Thus a chaste woman is advised not to agree to serve such a husband. It is not that a chaste woman should be like a slave while her husband is naradhama, the lowest of men. Although the duties of a woman are different from those of a man, a chaste woman is not meant to serve a fallen husband. If her husband is fallen, it is recommended that she give up his association. Giving up the association of her husband does not mean, however, that a woman should marry again and thus indulge in prostitution. If a chaste woman unfortunately marries a husband who is fallen, she should live separately from him. Similarly, a husband can separate himself from a woman who is not chaste according to the description of the sastra. The conclusion is that a husband should be a pure Vaisnava and that a woman should be a chaste wife with all the symptoms described in this regard. Then both of them will be happy and make spiritual progress in Krsna consciousness.

      Sri Caitanya-caritamrta

      CC Antya-lila

      CC Antya 7.106, Translation: Hearing this, Lord Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu said, "My dear Vallabha Bhatta, you do not know religious principles. Actually, the first duty of a chaste woman is to carry out the order of her husband.

      Other Books by Srila Prabhupada

      Krsna, The Supreme Personality of Godhead

      In this way, Kṛṣṇa explained the duty of a woman. He also stressed the point of serving the husband
      Krsna Book, Chapter 29: In this way, Krsna explained the duty of a woman. He also stressed the point of serving the husband: "Even if he is not of very good character, or even if he is not very rich or fortunate, or even if he is old or invalid on account of continued diseases, whatever her husband's condition, a woman should not divorce her husband if she actually desires to be elevated to the higher planetary systems after leaving this body. Besides that, it is considered abominable in society if a woman is unfaithful and goes searching for another man. Such habits will deter a woman from being elevated to the heavenly planets, and the results of such habits are very degrading. A married woman should not search for a paramour, for this is not sanctioned by the Vedic principles of life. If you think that you are very much attached to Me and you want My association, I advise you not to personally try to enjoy Me. It is better for you to go home, simply talk about Me and think of Me, and by this process of constantly remembering Me and chanting My names you will surely be elevated to the spiritual platform. There is no need to stand near Me. Please go back home."

      Lectures

      Srimad-Bhagavatam Lectures

      Any way my husband may be, whatever he may be, because I have accepted some gentleman as my husband I must look to his comforts, and whatever his position, it doesn't matter." This is the duty of the woman
      Lecture on SB 3.28.1 -- Honolulu, June 1, 1975: Now, this Devahuti's position is a perfect woman. She got good father, she got good husband, and she got excellent son. So woman has got three stages in life. Man has got ten stages. These three stages mean that when she is younger, she must live under the protection of father. Just like Devahuti when she was grown up, young, she proposed her father that "I want to marry that gentleman, that yogi." And the father also offered. So, so long she was not married she remained under the protection of the father. And when she was married she remained with the yogi husband. And she was troubled in so many ways because she was princess, daughter of king. And this yogi, he was in a cottage, no food, no shelter, nothing of the sort. So she had to suffer. She never said that "I am king's daughter. I was raised in so opulent condition of life. Now I have got a husband who cannot give me a nice apartment, nice food. Divorce him." No. That was never done. That is not the position. "Any way my husband may be, whatever he may be, because I have accepted some gentleman as my husband I must look to his comforts, and whatever his position, it doesn't matter." This is the duty of the woman. But that is Vedic instruction. Nowadays, as soon as there is little discrepancy, disagreement-divorce. Find out another husband. No. She remained. And then she got the nicest child, Personality of Godhead, Kapila. So this is the three stages. Woman should aspire first of all, by his (her) karma one is given the place under a suitable father, and then under suitable husband, and then produce a nice child like Kapiladeva.

      Conversations and Morning Walks

      1967 Conversations and Morning Walks

      A woman's duty is not to give up her husband even he is not of good character or if he is unfortunate, if he is old, or if he is diseased. Still, husband is worshiped by the wife.
      Discourse on Lord Caitanya Play Between Srila Prabhupada and Hayagr...: Prabhupāda: So one Kṛṣṇa and one gopī, they are dancing. That should be, scene should be... Then the rāsa dance should be stopped and Kṛṣṇa will talk with the gopīs. Kṛṣṇa will say to the gopīs that "My dear friends, you have come to Me in this dead of night. It is not very good because it is the duty of every woman to please her husband. So what your husband will think that you have come in such dead of night? A woman's duty is not to give up her husband even he is not of good character or if he is unfortunate, if he is old, or if he is diseased. Still, husband is worshiped by the wife. So you have come here, it is very sinful. So you... People will decry it. Please go back. Now we have finished."

      1972 Conversations and Morning Walks

      It is still man's duty to become the husband and woman's duty to become the wife.
      Interview with the New York Times -- September 2, 1972, New Vrindaban: John Nordheimer: What is the role of women in Kṛṣṇa consciousness?

      Prabhupāda: There is no distinction between men and women.

      John Nordheimer: I keep hearing about certain propensities women have that would separate them from propensities men have.

      Prabhupāda: Well, it is still man's duty to become the husband and woman's duty to become the wife; so these propensities are there. But all this can be adjusted. I have many students and am getting them married, and they are living peacefully and advancing in Kṛṣṇa consciousness. Not that everyone is brahmacārī. We have many gṛhasthas and children. In this way the propensities of the women and those of the man are adjusted. A man wants a woman, and a woman wants a man, so we say, "All right, take it. Live peacefully, but don't change partners." We don't allow divorce; once they're married there is no separation. Nor do we allow boys and girls to live together as friends. If a man wants a woman and a woman wants a man, they should become united by marriage, live peacefully and advance in Kṛṣṇa consciousness. That is our proposal. In this way all facilities are there in this movement. Our program is to make people become godly, and everyone should help us. Every sane man should help this movement for the good of society.

      1975 Conversations and Morning Walks

      Woman's duty is to follow husband. So if the husband is first-class, the wife is first-class, if she sticks to the husband.
      Room Conversation with Mr. & Mrs. Wax, Writer and Editing Manag...:

      Mrs. Wax: I realize that we're all considered spirit souls. But can a woman be first-class if she...

      Prabhupāda: Anyone can become first-class. Woman can become first-class if she is chaste and very much attached to husband. And if the husband is first-class, she becomes first-class. Because woman's duty is to follow husband. So if the husband is first-class, the wife is first-class, if she sticks to the husband.

      Mrs. Wax: But she can never be first-class unless she has a first class husband.

      Prabhupāda: No, she is first class by following faithfully husband. And if the husband is first-class, then woman is first-class.
      The duty of the woman after the husband takes sannyāsa is to remain a devotee, widow.
      Morning Walk -- November 2, 1975, Nairobi:

      Brahmānanda: What is the duties of the woman after the husband takes sannyāsa?

      Prabhupāda: So remain a devotee, widow. She is not allowed to marry.
      MATA JI! THERE ARE MANY SUCH INSTRUCTIONS BY ACHARYAS. PLEASE READ THEM.
      Bhaktivinoda Thakura >> Bhaktivinoda Vani Vaibhava >> Bhaktivinoda Vani Vaibhava Part 2 and 3 >> Vol 2 Abhidheya >> Association with Women >>

      70--Association with Women


      1. What is "association with the opposite sex"?

      A man's attachment for a woman and a woman's attachment for a man is called "association with the opposite sex." By chanting Krsna's holy names while renouncing such attachment, a householder can achieve the ultimate goal of life. (Jaiva Dharma, Chapter 25)

      2. Is association with women detrimental to devotional service?

      When there is no marital relationship and one converses with a woman with evil intentions, it is called stri-sariga. Such sahga is sinful and is detrimental to devotional service.
      {Sajjana Tosanl 10/11)

      3. What should a person who desires to attain pure devotional service renounce?

      Those who desire to attain pure devotional service should totally renounce the association of nondevotees and women. {Sajjana Tosanl 11/11)

      4. What is the purpose of marriage? What kind of people are engaged in animalistic activities? What is the mentality of a person attached to spiritual life?

      Those who possess a material body made of flesh and blood are always inclined to associate with women. To minimize this inclination, marriage is recommended. Those who wish to become free of the codes of marriage are almost like animals. But for those who have crossed beyond the rules of this natural inclination by the association of devotees and the strength of their service and have thus attained attraction for spiritual subject matter, associating with the opposite sex has no detrimental effect. (Sajjana Tosani 11/5)

      5. Who are the actual stri-sangis ?

      Those who are attached to associating with women are called stri-sangis. The materialists who are fond of gold and women, the sahajiyds, Bauls, Sains, and other so-called religiously minded persons who are greedy for women, as well as the woman-loving tantrics, are all examples of stri-sangls. The main point is that any men who are attached to womanly association are stri-sangis. By all means the Vaisnavas should give up the company of such stri-sangis. This is Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu's order. (Sajjana Tosanl 11/6)

      6. Is a Vaisnava householder licentious?

      A Vaisnava, whether a householder or renunciant, desires only transcendental happiness. A householder Vaisnava always works with his wife to achieve transcendental happiness. Although engaged in all kinds of work, he never becomes licentious. In this way, he remains free from women's association throughout his life. He totally renounces illicit, intimate speaking with women and the mundane licentious mood in licit association with his wife. {Sajjana Tosani 11/11)

      7. Is it good to become licentious?

      One should never become licentious, for it ruins everything. (Caitanya-siksamrta 2/5)

      8. Is associating with his wife one of the limbs of devotional service for a householder?

      It is not a limb of devotional service for a householder to associate with his wife, but it has been accepted as sinless as long as one uses such association to maintain family life.
      (Sajjana Tosani 4/6)

      9. How can women devotees give up bad association?

      It is essential for women devotees to give up the association of their nondevotee husbands. It is difficult to consider the nondevotee a husband because such an illusory enjoyer acts like a bull and proudly considers himself as the master. (Sri Bhagavatarka Marichi-mala 14/36)

      10. What harm is there if a tinge of material conception enters into our worship of Lord Hari?

      According to pure Vaisnava philosophy, the male practitioner of devotional service should worship Hari separate from female practitioners of devotional service. Similarly, the female practitioner should not allow male practitioners near them. Worship of Hari is a fully spiritual activity. A little material conception can spoil everything. (Sajjana Tosani 4/6)

      11. Whose association is most detrimental to devotional service?

      Association with those fond of women is most detrimental to devotional service. (Harinama-cintamani)

      12. What is the atonement for a renunciant who purposely sees a woman?

      If a Vaisnava in the renounced order of life deliberately sees a woman, he should atone by drowning himself in the Ganges at Triveni in order to become purified in his future lives.
      {Caitanya-caritdmrta Antya 2.165)
This reply was deleted.