Hare Krishna Dear Devotees
Dandavat Pranam
I have become hopeless. I see no fututre for me. I am like a dead man walking, a person who has only committed sins and offences throughout his life. I am lower than animals and insects, even they are better than me. And this is not my humility, this is my reality.
I am most conditioned and most fallen, I am helpless and hopeless, the only solution I see is death. I just request all the devotees who are reding this, please bestow upon me your blessings and pray for me, this is my last hope. Pray to Lord Nitya Nanda that He grants me Love of Godhead by His mercy. Else, the only solution I see is death.
Your Servant
Fallen and Suffering Soul
Replies
Please pray for me every day from now on so that I get a little relief in my ghost body, if possible, do extra rounds for me. Thank you
I have been praying to Krishna to give me stage 4 cancer, so I may die soon, without having to commit suicide. But Alas! No matter how much I pray to Him, He doesnt listen. Sometimes I feel He is so hard hearted, does He wants to force me to commit suicide and go to a ghost yoni? I have researched almost all ways of killing myself, from least ppainful to most painful, and even tried to survive somehow or the other, but I just cant face reality anymore. Therefore I prayed to Sri Nandnanada that please give me a cancer and let me be done, but He doesnt listen.
Okay. Bye.
All Glories to Srila Prabhupada.
Please accept my humble obediences.
The following lines are not meant to hurt you but rather to teach you.
A devotee said, “I am the most fallen, Prabhupada” and Prabhupada said, “You are not the most anything.” This devote was trying to show how humble he was. He wanted credit for being the most something, and Prabhupada said, “You are not the most anything.”
Thinking you are most fallen, etc etc is all a part of ego. Ego is a fuel for Maya. The more you fuel the ego the more the Maya will take you deeper.
How do I suggest you escape?
Repent that you are not already loving Krishna, or that you are not already surrendering to Krishna. From that repentence will come the required thing - humility. When your foundation is Humility then you will become more Krishna conscious.
The whole Krishna consciousness movement is based on feeling seperation from Krishna, and wanting only Krishna, no other things. Slowly, and gently you will get there. I myself havent reached much farther than you.
Chant Hare Krishna, eat Prasadam, and get a nice Guru Maharaj. Krishna loves you dearly, so try to escape this Maya for him.
All Glories to Srila Prabhupada .
Hare Krishna .
Thank you Mataji for your kind words. I would read your messages and get hope for a brief period of time. But the thing is that I have committed so many sins and offences, that my future has been completely destroyed. I tried but now there is no hope left. I prayed to Krishna to save me, to Chaitanya Mahaprabhu and Nityanand Prabhu but I think I am too late and too destroyed. I have been struggling and trying, but I think its over. Thank you all. Sorry.
I have given my 100% now, but there is no hope
As my final attempt, I am praying to Shree Radharani, as She is the most merciful. Please I request everyone to pray to Srimati Radharani for helping me, this is my last attempt.
Sorry
Thank you all, for going through my post and praying for me and giving me your blessings. Due to these, I still fought for a couple of days, I tried. I thought I would bounce back and let you all know that I have succeeded. But I failed, Sorry. I tried, really, but its too late, maybe I will have good fortune of serving you in next life. Hare Krishna!
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