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My heart is filled with jealous and hatred please help...

Please read my story with a calm mind although its long but i want to keep all my feelings in front of devotees:-

1. In 2016 i got married when i came in the house just after 1 month i started supporting my husband and was doing all household work alongwith my job. 

2. At that time i have to pay Rs275000 of loan of my husband which he has acquired to arrange the marriage.

3. I used to get up at 5'o clock in the morning prepare food and when come in the evening at 7pm prepare food.

4. My mother in law always critisized me that this food is not good or tasty or doesnt have tomato namak mirch etc so many complaints.

5.Then after 2 months my mother in law's neiece marraige scheduled to be happened.

6. She asks my husband to gift Rs.25000/- bed my husbands earning at that time was only Rs.21000/- even then he arranged everything she asked for and she spent near about Rs.70-80k in that marriage and doesn't care about my husband's loan.

7. When i started arguing that why so much money is spent please take care of money spent according to earnings. She started abusing me like randi kutiya kamini tere pese pe thhuu he.

8. Now the situation is our house sold now we are shifted to a rented house. I have a 10 months daughter. My husband's job is lost he is struggling for the job.

9. My mother in law 2-3 months back asked for Smartphone and my husband again fulfilled her wish.

10.I am earning and so my house is running. 

11.My mother in law daily goes to ISKON temple and sometimes waste food of the house. That ISKON temple very frequently organises dinner or lunch and my mother in law doesn't care about food cooked at home and eats lavish dinner in the temple.

12.My question is if someone goes to ISKON temple whether he/she gets licence to do anything wrong to any person? And we are not suppossed to feel victim or grow hatred just because she goes to temple.

13. Many of you have suggested to question her face to face i had in the past nothing happened only home peace disturbed.

14. Navratri are coming whenever we goes to temple she accompany us and i am bound to take her along. Then my heart filled with so much hatred that she did not do for her children she is so selfish even then she is enjoying spiritual life and on the other hand my parents are there.

15.My father is retired my mother is school teacher and working and alone does all the household work. Living in a very low quality house suffers the pain of summer, rain, winter as the roof is open. They didi everything for us and are living with so many obstacles in the life and that too alone.

16. On the other hand my mother in law is there used her childeren for her selfish motives even then god is supporting her don't know why.

WHY SO MUCH INJUSTICE IS THER PLEASE HELP

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Replies

  • E-Counselor
    Hare KRsna Mataji,
    PAMHO.
    Again I am saying, your approach towards the whole thing has to be examined.
    Pls tell me what you are looking for? What is your purpose of coming to a forum and publicly talking about what is going on in your house - about the "injustices" by your in laws on you. What do you want to prove? That you are the only or first lady to go through problems from inlaws in India?
    What do you want from us?
    Please write to me at rashmi.khaitan@ril.com. Then I will give you my number if required.
    This way you are achieving nothing.
    Committing suicide? Frankly - its your choice. Aisa koi problem nahi hai jiska solution nahi. Aur aapka to bahut chota problem hai - YES - believe me. Your problem doesn't even count as problem in the eyes of many, who has seen PROBLEMS.
    I am not trying to belittle your problems at all. Just trying to give you a perspective from a different angle.
    You calm down - I can help you in that also.
    COntact me.
    Haribol,
    Your servant,
    Radha Rasamayi DD
    • I don't want to prove anything. I just want to know just because she goes to temple her doings are not wrong? If yes then whether me too should start same thing wasting money and other household things like food etc without caring my husband and child?
      • E-Counselor
        Who has said she is not wrong, simply because she is going to temple? Where it is written that if one is going to temple, that person becomes above all faults? So fine, you got her a certificate that she is wrong.....so that makes you happy?
        Regarding wasting money, if that gives you happiness, go ahead. After all, your hard earned money, your choice what you want to do with it.
        If you want to help your situation, listen. For that you have to come to a level where you are able to listen when we say something.
        Again your choice whether you want to do this or not.
        • Thanks i am not happy but got my answer that i am not wrong in my point of view. As far as solution is concerned as of now there is no solution. I will wait for the time when god will do justice with me.
          • E-Counselor
            I am sorry, you didn't understand. I didn't say you are not wrong - I said she is not right simply because she goes to temple.
            Solution is there - you don't want. There are some people who are happy being sad, who think shaadi karna Shaheed hona ek hi baat hai. Again your choice.
            God does not give us bitter experiences to make us bitter. He gives us bitter experiences to make us better. Life is all about converting an adversity into an opportunity. The journey is knowing how to do it. Sometimes one may need help.
            Haribol.
            • Me kaha galat hu please mujhe batayie? Meri galati batayie taki me sudhar saku. Jahan tak pati se baat karne ki baat he. Wo kai bar mere tokne par keh chuke he ki tumhara pesa he na ghamand he tumhe me kamaunga phr tumhare muh par phekkar marunga.. Karne wala bs karta rahe uske sath galat hota rahe jab wo kuch bole to bol do ki acha ghamand dikha ri he. Ye hamare ghar ke logo ka mindset he..
              • E-Counselor
                You inability to learn from the situation and grow into a better individual, your allowing your heart to be filled with jealousy and hatred is your failure mataji. Life brings so many situations in front of us to teach us lessons. If we fail to learn from them, the situation keeps on returning to us, in more and more intense manner. We have to learn from whatever we are facing. Nothing happens to us by chance.
                If you handle this situation properly, I see your mother in law becoming your biggest support system and both of you growing to care for and love each other, such that she will miss you and you will miss her when she is gone. I know you are laughing at me now, it is possible,
                Pati parameshwar handling is a different ball game altogether. That we will discuss separately.
                Why blame and hate mother in law alone, when husband is proving to be her son and not your husband.
                • Kal me ghar gayi again 2 roti bachi hui thi subh ki jabki mene sirf 6 roti banayi thi lunch ki aur khane wale 3 log husband aur in laws. Din me chawal bane aur mother in law aur husband ne chawal khae. Mene apne pati se itna bola ki thk he aapko chawal khane the but ek roti bhi kha lete sath me roj subh sham khana bachta he. Unhe nahi pata tha ki roti rakhi hui thi warna wo wo bhi kha lete. Mere sasur chid gae kehte tum kya samajhti ho apne aap ko tum kamane wali ho to aise bologi mere bete ko khane ko aise tokogi. Mene kya galat kaha aap batayie agar ghar ka khana waste ho to kya ye achi baat he? Meri aisi koi intention nahi ki me pati ko kuch sunau kamane ke piche ye sanskar nahi mere. Me sabke bare me sochti hu aur aaj mujhe hi galat tehra diya gaya. Raat ko saas wahi mandir se apni saji hui thali leke ayi puri paneer sabji halua. Wo khud acha khana khake dusro ko basi khilati he. Me chahti hu sabko acha khilau phr bhi me hi galat. Mere sasur ko wo itni galiyan deti he saale kutte kamine ghar bethke rotiyan todta he ye ni hota ki kuch kamae. Phr bhi me hi galat. Aur dhamki ab to ye ki acha ni lag raha to ham log chale jate he. Meri beti ko kaun sambhalega wo log chale gae to. Blackmailing nahi to kya he ye. Hamare ghar ka yahi rule he bs waste karo aur koi toke to use bolo acha ghamand dikha rahi he hame...mera man bhut dar gaya he wo log chale gae to meri beti ka kya hoga. Me kuch nahi kahungi aage se chahe kitni wastage ku na ho ghar me.
                  • E-Counselor
                    Can I ask you something? PLs tell me about your sadhana level - are you chanting? What do you do in terms of puja path/ belief in God/ reading Gita or Ramayan.. Then I will be better placed to answer.
                    • my email id is kinshuk.parul@gmail.com
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