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PAMHO, AGTSP,
Hare Krishna,
They are serving DDY since 2008 and prior to that they were in Muscat serving the movement. You were with them for 2 years so you should be knowing this better. I remember your name very distinctly because she mentioned that you chant higher number of rounds amongst all. Unless there’s one more devotee with the same name and doing that many number of rounds as a coincidence, which I doubt.
Prabhu, I am a physiologist by profession therefore I can understand your state of mind now. Kindly do not get influenced by anyone. This KC movement is very rare and let maya not play a major role in our life. My sincere request to you is to approach her directly and open your heart and sort out the matter. I know their dedication to the movement & their only focus is to serve Krsna therefore no way one’s ego will be hurt. More than you she will be in pain to loose a devotee like you. In any case, since you are a beginner. There’s nothing wrong in you approaching and asking for correction. This way Krsna will be pleased and you satisfy the self too rather than blaspheming a devotee which is one of the offences that we read before chanting our rounds.
Your servant,
Vaibhavi Sheth
PAMHO, AGSTSP
Hare Krishna,
Sorry prabhu to hear this. However, according to me it’s not appropriate to be judgmental on just hearing your side and basing our intelligence and speculate further. We are conditioned souls with 4 defects. Out of that the 1st. one is committing mistakes. Therefore my sincere request is to understand the KC mission. Preaching is one of the strongest force of Iskcon and if one takes up this service then he is very dear to SP as well to Lord krsna too. As a result, we should avoid committing any Vaishnava offence without really understanding the purpose.
Since you mentioned the country and your name, therefore I know this family very well. Eventhough I am settled in Canada but I was once upon a time in the same place where you are and I know this family very well and are in this movement for the past 8 years and are bringing souls like me into the movement. They have turned my whole family into KC devotee therefore please do not spread rumors or spoil the image of a Vaishnava who is helping SP’s mission to spread KC everywhere. Krnsa keeps note of any offence committed to a person especially a preacher. I have attended her classes in the year 2009 and have associated with the family and let me tell you the positivity, knowledge and the care that I have got from them, I am yet to experience. On the contrary I remember her mentioning your name and appreciating your devotional service and level.
You mentioned that she did not like you accepting a Guru of your choice but you are also mentioning that she asked you the choice. This is quite contrary to what you are claiming. If this was the case, then she would not have even asked you your choice but forced upon you the Guru since you were new. Moreover you are saying you were there for 2 years. Therefore during that time did you not notice the behavior? A person’s behavior does not manifest all of a sudden especially in KC. Unless someone has committed a gross sin which is against the sashtra. If that’s her nature how can she bring so many people in the movement. But according to you she is bringing lots of other devotees too. You also mentioned that many people have left the congregation, as far as I know none of them have left but have either relocated like me or have started their own classes within the same locality. Honestly I am not convinced on your claims. If she is at fault then why should she threaten you to complain the higher authority. Sorry Prabhu, this claims does not hold water or sympathy.
I do not want to commit any offence unto you, since she has told me how serious devotee you are. But at the same time she being your mentor and mine too, I guess, if she has chastised you then you should not look for a material solution but spiritual if going back to Krsna is the aim of your life.
Your servant,
Vaibhavi Sheth
maybe You can pray for her?
Maybe You can visit her home and share some Prasadam with her?
Maybe You can ask if she needs any help in life?
Maybe You can ask for some other services You can render?
Maybe You can give some gifts to her?
Even after all these she is the same then keep doing prayers for her well being.
Maybe You could also try to talk to her and clear out some misunderstandings...
You can tell her things which are hurting You....request her to forgive You...
These are things i try in my life and really works.
If things do not change i just keep praying for their well being, so that let Krishna make her or him happy.
'Oh Lord, let all good which i have go for her if with that she will be happy!
Oh Lord, please beg You make her happy! Please make her happy!'
Your servant,
Hare Krsna Prabhuji,
PAMHO.
Very sorry to hear about your predicament.
What do you want to do - you can do either of 2 things - 1) Complain to your yatra leader/ temple president with facts and figures and ask for guidance or 2) tolerate everything as Krsna's mercy.
The first path will lead you to correct this lady eventually (maybe) or spoil your own sadhana.
The second path will make you helpless and dependent on Krsna, make you progress spiritually much faster. You have already chosen that path, I can make out. Srila Prabhupada had mentioned once - in grihasta ashram, I had been able to control mating and defending and in sanyassa life, I could control eating and sleeping. So its very good.
THe only thing is this is the longer, more ardous path. You will be tested a lot, but you will come out winner eventually. Just cling on to your sadhana like dear life and continue to go to the temple under all circumstances. You are not getting service, no problem, sitting and chanting in front of the deities is also service. Do taht, cry helplessly and pray fervently to the lord for strength and direction.
As far as aparadha commited by this mataji is concerned, you just dont bother. You can take care of your own sadhana, not of anyone elses.
Haribol,
Your servant,
Rashmi