how to survive among non KC people?

Hare Krishna!pamho......Please advise that how we can behave among non KC people,and specially when they are one'sParents,who don't appreciate ur Bhakti....,and prescribe rather mundane folding of hands for desires.And further if u try to give them a little bit of KC nectar.....they fume.Further I read that the good deeds or punya of many births accumulated..... Gives u initiationOr way to Hari considering this.....perhaps my folks may not deserve KC in this does it mean I shud stop my efforts.....else it becomes a vaishnava apradh......because somehow....I feel for my parents to taste this nectar...kindly advise the right approach.....Hari bol !

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  • And many accept a path and believe it to be the only one. Sad the world is when there is only one stream. Good post.i Like rashmis post.
  • E-Counselor

    Hare KRsna Prabhuji,


    This question is very frequently asked, esp by teenagers and students. They think that because they have chosen a path, they have a right to preach to their parents and of course, it is the duty of the parents to immediately accept whatever they are saying. Plus they have no, absolutely no patience with their parents. The problem lies in the approach.

    You cannot preach to your parents with words at all, regardless of your age and their age. Who has said that you have to open your mouth to preach? If you are so convinced about this path, why dont you preach with your behaviour? Pls show them compassion, become more humble and obedient, more respectful (they are your parents after all), more accepting, much much more patient with them (they are one generation older than you, how do you expect them to accept a new thing as readily as you? Remember, they do not even accept a machine like an I-pad or a phone/ laptop so easily).

    Your parents are future devotees prabhu. With your behaviour, you can bring them closer to Krsna or you can push them away for lifetimes, the choice is yours. Like others have mentioned, devotion is an internal process. First internalise, get firmed up and open your mouth to preach only if they specifically ask you something. Else, do your own sadhana. Always listen to them carefully and try to understand the logic or reason for their concern. If you are unable to explain to them yet, you can get a senior devotee from the temple/ congregation (older than parents or closer to their age and senior spiritually also, ideally) to visit them and clarify their doubts. be more flexible with them - you be firm on your sadhana, thats all. All other matters, be more flexible and adjusting. Parents change only when they see the change in your behaviour and nature. That is a long drawn out process.

    It is also possible that they do not change as much as you or at the pace you want. Its ok. Accept them for what they are and they will accept you for what you believe in.

    There are two key words here - internalise and patience.

    Best of luck,


    Your servant,


    • Thank you Mataji......for the genuine doubts and way is cleared.

      Hari Bol!
  • Hare Krishna,

    Bhakti is the internal process, process of heart... Bhakti doesn't depend upon anything external

    (i.e how to wear, sit, talk etc)

    So, be just be neutral & original with ignorant people and not to disturb the minds of them, nor we need to forced our ideas on them. 

    Rather we should try to engage them in topics related with Krishna, gradually step by step heart of them will become purify

    If you live with them then try to give them offered food, gradually they become purified...

    One should fully depend upon Krishna, he cares them more than us, not now but one day everyone will get back to him.

    First we have make our-self strong and perfect then preach.

    We should not make a show of our devotional service, nor we have to rebel against non KC things... one has to be neutral

    They are not aliens but the one of us, only difference is that they are ignorant of true self ... so we have deal very carefully.

    They are alot of ways to engage our-self in KC without getting known to anyone...

    As i said earlier, its a internal process so minimize external behavior

  • Haribol!

    Why be different when with non-devotees.  Be yourself, be true to Krishna and yourself. There is not rush in changing your parents.  As the days pass by the will see your immense happiness. That will be their taste.  If you push your beliefs and desires onto your parents you might end up pushing them away from KC.  Do not stop just work with Gods timing.  As long of they are aware of how loving Krishna is the rest will follow shortly.

    Hare Krishna

    • hare krishna !

      thank u very much mataji.

      I am also having same probl with inlws now i understand hw to behave

      hari bol

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