How do I work on my bad temper?

Hare Krsna prabhus and matajis,


On most occasions, being chill and cant be bothered about anything are my known qualities. It is so rare I exhibit temper as most of the time I ignore and just move on not looking back or thinking of the negative, infact I dispose an extreme level of patience most of my peers and family members dont.


But if my temper is triggered,, I dont know how to control it. I shout and blow my tops with very sharp piercing words. I go on and on for almost half hour no one wants to be around. Today after it happened again, I was driving my car in high speed as I was burning with krodha i didnt realise when I had put a sudden brake close to my house. Watching my car come to a sudden halt, a young teenager riding his bike few metres behind me in panic, skidded off and hurt himself. He wasnt hurt badly but he surely was bleeding I could see. I got out of my car and went to aid him immediately but eventually ended up showing my temper to him for driving like a little girl and not having a valid license. I even called him an idiot and wanted to slap him for asking me to pay for the damage caused to his bike though I didnt hit him. I didnt pay him a cent nor said sorry for stopping my car abruptly . The only thing I did was help him wash his wound while scolding the poor boy.


Do you realise how my negative vibrations caused someone to be hurt??? I feel so disapointed with myself and shameful the way I acted I could eat soil if I have to. This is no way to behave most especially being in Krsna Conciouss I know. Im tired,,, I cant deal with this,,, please tell me what I should do..Ill take anything. I made biggest aparadh again by scolding my Lord Ganesh :(

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  • hare krsna!

    please accept my humble obesciences!

    all glories to guru and gauranga!

    In bhagavad gita chapter 13......krsna describes anger to be one of the gates to hell......kaama krodha tatha lobha tasmad etad trayam tyajet...hence a sane man shud quit all three of them....anger, lust and greed....

    now the question arises how to control anger......

    il tell u wat srila prabhupada used to say...

    he used to give an example...

    he said.....suppose u sit on the banks of a pond......wer the waters are calm and u can see the fishes and turtles in the water very they are....but now if u throw a stone into the water....ripples are caused and the whole water surface gets try seeing the fishes and the turtles.....u the water surface is totally disturbed....hence u cannot c things as they are!

    so wat to do??........sit there for sometym.....let the water settle......then after sometym...u can again c the things(fishes and the turtles) as they are!

    Now lets relate this analogy to anger.....getting angry means...throwing a stone on the water surface.....and then v shout as in that fit of rage...we dont c things as they the remedy is......stay calm....let anybody provoke u....hurl abuses..watever...just stay calm...dont react......dont retaliate....just pick up ur beads....and chant 2 a nys loud a secluded place...this is lyk staying calm and sitting on the banks...letting the water settle down.....and then after these 2 gud rounds u realise that...ur feeling better...even without shouting or reacting!

    medical science says that getting angry...destroys...1000 cells in the brain immediately+  spiritually we incur bad karma!

    y shud we then get angry??.....just nysly convince urself about this....and become more fixed up in krsna consciousness....then by the mercy of guru and gauranga...things will definitely better!

    hope i cud serve u well....

    vaishnava dasanudasanudas,

    amarnath das

    • Hare krishna amarnath prabhu

      dandvats on your lotus feet

      realy very nice reply



      your servant

      Ravi Dewangan

  • I think you have excess of pent-up energy which you are not able to spend or ooze out. Why don't you try some vigorous form of exercise (provided your heart permits), like swimming, jogging, dancing, shouting, anything to your liking until you feel completely worn out. Try this for seven days and see. If nothing happens, you may require professional help. We are our best friend as well as our enemy. Only our way of thinking and behaving is to be changed for whichh a deep self respect, self analysis, self introspection is required.

    What happens, we have forgotten how to "LET IT GO". As a result our ego, our self esteem, all try to overcome our rational thinking which turns into a violent rage. So learn to open your valve to release the pressure built inside.

    You should also learn to resist the outside influence coming inside you to torment you. Everything is possible, but you have to learn, observe and hold to the same.

    Hare Krishna.

  • Jai Shri Krishna..


    I know exactly what you are feeling, I used to be like that.  Thinking back how selfish and disrespectful I was.. ;-( I could just die!  What helped me was the videos of Prabhupad and the scriptures etc. that Prabhupad published.  Also read a lot about the Vaisnavas throughout the ages, how they suffered, how humble they remained and how loving they are.


    They have set a goal which I must reach and with Prabhupad's mercy, I will attain.

    All the best..


  • Volunteer

    Anger is very close to insanity, and must be avoided. Its not quiet insanity, but very close.

    Because when a person is angry, like a person who is drunk, will lose judgement and say or do things they would not do if they were not angry.

    We must ask Krishna to help us overcome this demon called anger, so we may serve Him better.

    If you ever get a chance to meet this boy again, be sure to ask for forgiveness. Lord will really appreciate that, because to Him all are equal, even an ant.

    Part of the reason why we get angry is because of our selfishness. Because things did not go according to our wishes. We need to understand and constantly remind ourselves that our life is NOT about OUR happiness or comfort, but Krishna's. This is where having a guru can be really helpful. We can always do simple things that pleases our guru. When guru is pleased, Krishna is also pleased.... and we feel fulfillment in our life, as servants of servant of Krishna.

    Mataji, kindly forgive me if I offended you.

  • Hare krishna mata ji

    Dandvat pranam


                         May lord krsna bless u soon, 

                        i know u r intelligent mata ji , but sometimes its happen in our spiritual life because   we are not completely   engage in service of lord without 24 hour service we cant examine himself that what m i ? and what is my abode ? what is my shelter? 

    Why we lost our patient or intelligence?

    in B.G 2.67   indriyanam hi caratam  yan mano 'nuvidhiyate 
    tad asya harati prajnam vayur navam ivambhasi

    Meaning:- As a boat on the water is swept away by a strong wind, even one of the senses on which the mind focuses can carry away a man's intelligence.

    that means when one of  sense  being tie up with test of materiality can smartly loss our intelligibilities .

    if there is heat sure there is fire , So don't follow heat we will loss. 

    So without perfect sense (under controlled) we can't serve better we need to engage our sense  in service of lord every moment 

    in B.G 10.10 

    tesam satata-yuktanam  bhajatam priti-purvakam 
    dadami buddhi-yogam tam  yena mam upayanti te

    Meanning:- To those who are constantly devoted and worship Me with love, I give the understanding by which they can come to Me.


    the word is constantly is most important its all time 24 hours / that means  in whole of our  conscious being filled by Krishna  so until 24 hours service we cant find our abode or destination of mind.


    trying to serve

    Ravi Dewangan 

    • we can do work in bad temper  by proper practice 


      In B.G  8.8 abhyasa-yoga-yuktena cetasa nanya-gamina 
      paramam purusam divyam yati parthanucintayan

      meaning:- He who meditates on the Supreme Personality of Godhead, his mind constantly engaged in remembering Me, undeviated from the path, he, O Partha [Arjuna], is sure to reach Me.

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