Fighting back the 'feelings'??

hare krishna :)


I am trying to be very sincere in KC and I've always belived in Krishna, but I've developed affection for him too now and not just belive but i'm very stupid and this one thing always causes me to suffer...


some days go well but somedays even though I would read a lot (prabhupadji's books) and theoretically understand.. my mind can't stop thinking about him (a guy) ... I don't want to think about him nor I want to care what he does in his life but still I would go totally paranoid and check emails/phone again n again for his messages (sometimes he does) and thinking if he's with someone else now then my mind would stop working and I would go totally blank and feel very heavy hearted and sick and it won't go away... till then too guilty and feeling stupid to read or chant and think I don't deserve to hear Kanha's pastimes I would kill time doing stupid things or just sleep.. and this all totally deviates me for 3-4 days until Kanha shows his mercy again on me which I feel guilty about too that Kanha always brings me on the right track and I can't seem to control. Kanha has always blessed me with ideal conditions in life to be able to develop KC. I only want to love my Kanha... and not ever care about the stupid pointless feelings which sometimes take over me.


Any advice please :-/      ( I know going to temple regularly will help but it's 2 and half hours away and no bus goes there )

You need to be a member of ISKCON Desire Tree | IDT to add comments!

Join ISKCON Desire Tree | IDT

Email me when people reply –


  • Hare Krishna..PAMHO AGSP

    Chant your round Consistantly,it is very helpful for controling our senses.

    Coz origin of all the bad habits are our senses,our senses always wants to satisfy with material things and material things can never satisfy our senses,it will be satisfy only  the chanting of Holy name of supreme personality of lord Krishna.

    So Chant Hare Krishna Mahamantra very attentively....and be happy 

    • tku abhishek pr g hari bol !

  • but i've given suggestion hare krishna

  • hare krishna soumya ji i've read ur probs  u don't care about it whether he is caring u / not. u just think of krishna & don't feel inferior to urself dat u r not fit but pray to him to get out of dis he will surely help u in dat . as every one is doing mistake 1 sense or other . but if anyone truly tries to become his devotee then he will help them to slove their probs . wishing u happy spiriyual progress hari bol

  • hare krishna!

    when you feel these heavy feelings its the most prime time to chant and read about krishna!! and trust me when you find your self caught up in reading about krishnas pastimes or chanting you wont find your self sad at all! and you will realize you havent thought of this "guy" in a while!! " let calamity come again and again" - queen kunti said because when we are down in the dumps and we feel so sad and miserable in this material world that is when we really call out to krishna and need krishna most. i experience this all the time when im sad because life throws me a curve ball i cry out to krishna and prabhupada for strength. and its the moat beautiful thing! soon you will have the realization that the only thing that matters in life is remembering krishna and rendering service unto krishna. i am no senior devotee or posses and extensive knowledge  about philisophy but i do know that when im sad krishna and prabhupada are the only medicine 


  • Volunteer

    Hare Krishna dear Soumya Mataji, please accept my humble obeisances! All glories to Srila Prabhupada!

    How much i understand You! And how much i know such like suffering from these attachments to somebody who is mortal. Not perfect. 

    And sometimes it makes me to cry and pray to Lord Narasimha Dev begging to remove such like attachments such like yearnings for material things. What to do? It is the only way. Maya is very strong. Very very strong. And only way is to call someone else for help. And that is Krishna, Gopinath.

    "Oh Lord, oh dear one because i hanker for material things i am always in anxiety. My mind does not know peace. On the place of thinking of You i lament and think of association of others. Please, do something! Please, tear up these desires into peaces and let me to think of You! Let my mind, soul, body intelligence belong to You! Please, accept me as Your servant!...."

    This cry is the only way.

    As like we are in the house of someone and huge dog comes out and starts to attack us. What we can do? We could fight with dog also we could call out for the owner of the dog. The first one is very risky because we are weaker than the dog but the second is very nice because even if a dog is like of a tiger if the owner orders him to be quite he goes away.

    as a summary:

     Not to You,

    Not to You!

    Oh jewel One, I hanker not for Your!

    But to mortals as if in between there’s glue.

    I yearn to have,

    I even cry in order to have,

    But not for You. Oh Lord!

    Oh Lord! Believe, not for You!

    What should I do?

    My fortune far away flew?

    Now with tears, standing before You!

    Oh Lord, see! What else I can do?

    At least I will dance for You,

    With both arms towards You!

    “Please, take! Take away this glue!”

    Let my life and soul belong to You!

    Be my air! Be for me like water!

    Let me see, touch and drink Your beauty!

    Please, be my life’s only goal!

    Let me also give to You myself – soul!

    Your servant, 

  • Volunteer


This reply was deleted.