Hare krishna devotees
I sometimes ponder over my life and find that in front of the world I am a very cheerful person I am always joking and laughing but in the alone I am always filled with sadness, guilt ,depression and loneliness I feel doublefaced .
In front of people I behaves like a saint angerless very patient very adjusting respecting and calm but in my home with my family I am always shouting and filled with anger I get irritated if someone does anything that is not of my choice I don't cooperate with anything, I roam in the world agitated many times I disrespect my mother and father I also took relation managing classes of iskon but it didn't work I think it is not a good behaviour as a devotee . Please help me with both
Hare Krsna Prabhuji,
Sorry for delay in replying.
I am glad to note that you are getting connected to BACE. That is the best way to be in association and grow in Krsna Consciousness for you right now.
The journey is within prabhu. We have to ensure that we change internally. It is slow, gradual process, requires perseverance and patience. Please chant attentively and consciously monitor your thoughts and actions. Introspect and see whether you could have done something better. Next time try to implement it. Like this, take baby steps towards becoming the person you want to be.
Radha Rasamayi DD
I too am happy when talking to others and sad when alone. It's not a facade, i genuinely enjoy company, and am sad when alone. Anger is a waste of energy. "There are three gates leading to this hell-lust, anger, and greed. Every sane man should give these up, for they lead to the degradation of the soul." - BG 16.21. I had a psychedelic session which has given me courage to work hard despite depression. I think make a friend if you can.
There is no devotee near me i tried finding one but couldn't this is the needle of the heart
Brother i relate as i too couldn't find any like minded friend. By "if you can" i meant if luck allows, it's in God's hand.
You Are in which class prabhu
I will be very bappy if we can grow together in bhakti
It's been more than 10 years since i've passed school 😄
I respect ISKCON's path of chanting Krishna's names. I'm more attracted to the path of aghora/tantra, but yes bhakti is relevant there too. I came to this forum right now for taking a break from work and because i like Krishna. Prabhu if you want we can share notes about following the teachings of Gita, feel free to message me. Your profile says you're in Mathura, so i guess it should be easier for you to find some Krishna devotee offline, like in your apartments complex or something. I've been in Delhi NCR and there've been people associated with ISKCON around me. Also i think try to improve the situation at your home, one's community can easily impact the happiness of the person.
Hare Krsna dear devotee, please accept my humble obeisances
I will try to answer your question to the best of my abilities - forgive me for any offences I commit
In my humble opinion
a person should ask himself a few questions everytime he's faultering
1. Am I following the 4 regulative principles with 0% adulteration? (you'll become naturally blissful if you stringently follow these because these principles have been put in place to establish us alongside with the 4 pillars of Dharma - namely austerity, cleanliness, truthfulness, and compassion - often devotees faulter in the principle of no illicit sex of any sort, or either by meat eating/ consuming karmi food with mushrooms, onion, garlic, tea, coffee)
2. Am I following the ABCD of bhakti? Association - of devotees, B - book reading (obtaining Association of Srila prabhupada; sravanam this one is the easiest & yet the most powerful), C - Chanting the holy name, D - diet of prasadam
3. Am I honestly furthering my efforts to obtain the true goal of human life - Krsna prapti (prema bhakti jahan hoite, avidya vinash jate)
4. Am I regularly engaged or trying to prepare my self for preaching the holy name (preaching is the essence of Krsna consciousness/ beside without following the 4 regulative principles & ABCD of bhakti one can't be prepared to preach)
5. Am I representing what my acharyas have preached? Am I following vaisnav shishtachar? Am I thankful to the lord for ever blessing, every resource he has given me through varoius people, am i thankful to the lord for fulfilling my needs through my parents? how would my life have had been otherwise if the Supreme lord woudn't have been so merciful?
Please dovetail your life towards krsna add krsna in your life, if you want to dance - dance on kirtan, if you want to sing - sing kirtan or the vaishnav bhajans, if you want to feast - feast on krsna prasadam; engage yourself in the higher more nectarean stuff regularly, I believe it will help you surely
All glories to Srila Prabhupada
Prabhu ji there is no devotee near me nor i have any serious friend online I feel very lonely in this materialistic world where there is no one with whom I can tell my feelings share about my shadna that's why I think there is this problem
My family is also a non devotee family they always instruct about materialistic achievements but none of krsna and spiritually i don't talk to them much and don't interact with them too
I am feeling so low in bhakti I don't have any temple near me my exams are coming so i don't have much time i don't know what to do but just three words- I am suffering , even being a devotee. actually i was much happier when i was not a devotee earlier I used I give time to my family talk with my friends but now if i talk with my friends and family I feel guilty of wasting time
Hare krsna prabhu ji thank you for replying it feels so good talking to devotees
You can obtain Association online via zoom call group & do your morning sadhna with us
Hope to see you in our morning online program Join Iskcon B.A.C.E. Mamgachhi
Also please prioritze the opportunity Krsna has given you to get educated;
as a by product the education will allow you to
become self dependant, nurture yourself, contribute to the serve Krsna's preaching & serve pure devotees of the lord
Why worry when there's lord Hari?