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I personally had to go through this after my Father's departure a year and a half back.
I had been instructed that no fire should be lit in the house. Therefore, we did not even cook for certain number of days, and we could not even worship our deities for the said period. We kept them to rest, or you even have an option to let another devotee serve them for the said time period.
We observed this till the 13th day.
Ideally you should consult a senior Vaishnava in your locality, or nearest temple and they can guide you.
Sometimes even your community may have certain rules, which can be observed.
What about food that we need to eat during this period, all our food shoudl be offered to the Lord before eating, do we then just do the offering in front of a picture rather than to our deities during this period? thanks
Garuda purana is the mainly followed by brahmanas during this period of mourning.
Nama Sankirtana is permitted under ANY circumstances. Chanting on the beads and Sankirtana, loud congregational chanting in public places should not be stopped.
hare krishna pr ji. pamho. agtsp.
I come from a south indian brahamana family and we have lot of customes that are followed at our home. not only when some one dies in the family, when some one gives birth to a child also they follow this ritual of not performing any diety worship for 13 days.
i asked one senior devotee when my uncle had passed away few years ago as I was asked by mother not to go to temple for next 13 days. In fact I was staying in temple that time and had no place to go. i was adviced that for a devotee these things does not matter and I can continue my services in temple as usual.
Vedic rules say no to deity worship during 13 days mourning of death at home. This applies to the kith and kins of the dead. This is as per Garuda Purana. One can continue chanting on beads and sankirtana at home, because the soul wanders around during this period, before he is taken for facing the penalty of bad as well as good karma. Reading Garuda Purana, which are Lord's words to quell Garuda's doubts will help sharpen the knowledge and increase our faith in Lord Krishna.
At any moment of time, always prasadam should be honoured, food offered to Krishna with Love and Devotion.
Then, there are many rules, like not to visit any other house, not to offer any food or water to the guests who come knowingly or unknowingly. But its always difficult to follow all the prescribed rules. Hence, it is advised to chant Hare Krishna Mahamantra and conduct Satsangs in these days to the family members.
Everything about this dukhalaya is inauspicious. Ideally nothing should be offered to Bhagavan Ji from here except prayers that can actually be offered 24x7 in any fashion. The scriptures also say that no one is no ones father, mother, wife, husband son or any so called mundane relations that are just a part of the arrangement by Bhagavan Ji to facilitate false enjoyment to defaulting jivas who are placed here. Actually it is only Vasudevasya Kutumbaha. He is your only eternal relative who is always with you. Love Him for how he has reciprocated to us despite our expression of jealousy and mischief unto Him, make amends and reestablish full connectivity with Him.
Om Sri Sri Bhagavan Sankarshanaya Namaha.
Following is the essence of the instructions that we got when one of my husband's family member passed away from Bhadra Charu prabhu (Pujari in Mayapur)
In scriptures, different level of instructions have been given for different level of consciousness. For aspiring Gaudiya Vaishnavs who are by definition worshippers and followers of Sri Radha, instruction is simple 'Service to Krishna is Nitya (eternal)'. It is 'Ahaituki (Causeless) and Apratihata (Unhindered)'.
Krishna's deity is non different from Him and those who have the good fortune of worshipping a deity should do so thinking though Krishna is the Supreme Lord and controller but in this form (deity) He has come to me, for me to take care of Him like a child. In a deity form Krishna is dependant on you. So in no circumstance Deity should not be fed or worshipped. Their are definitely rules and regulation in worshipping deities but they are centred around treating the deity as the dear and beloved one, for eg. a Pujari would never eat before or with the deity.
It would be of great benefit to the departed soul if Krishna's prasad is offered to him for a certain period as instructed by a Pujari. Also, one should place Maha Garland on the body of the departed.
To conclude, even in case of death of a family member deities should be worshipped with more devotion and enthusiasm along with prayers for the departed soul.
My view is different from the view of Ms. Ankita Sharma.
Deities at home are not "Pran Pratista deities "(Who require elaborate worship) and they are welcomed "installed" at home by simple abhishek,. Prabhupada advised every one to have deities so that we can develop seva Bhav (and this is like a trailer of film) before we actually do seva at Goloka Vrindavan.
Throughout India the temples are closed few hours before Grahan , the authorities would surely be aware of the requirements of the Lord. Then why they close the temple and open much later after the Grahan is over and after they take bath.
No doubt the Lord in the deity form is dependent on us. But, still there are times when deity should not be worshipped. For a example when a lady is having her monthly cycle, After returning from crematorium a person should not enter the temple or worship a deity, during Grahan and so on. We can check these details in the purports of Srila Prabhupada.
Sastras clearly prescribe that we should abstain from worshiping the deities on such occassion. What does a person do when he/she goes on yatra and they have deities at home?
So, the solution is given in Sastras. There is something called Manas seva. There are several types of sevas and one of them is Manasa seva ( worshiping the Lord and offering Bhog by mind) the example of Manas seva is given in Nector of Devotion about a brahamana who was doing Manasa seva and he got liberated because of his intense seva. A devotee can (if they are very attached to the deity form ) close the alter for those 11 days and worship the Lord through manas seva.
When I lost my mother, as soon as we heard the news, I called a devotee to come home and he picked up the deities and was worshipping Them for next 11 days. After the purification ceremony was over on 13th day, we brought Them (deities) back and started our usual worship. This way the deities were taken care and we could adhere to the sastras.
Hare Krishna Prabhu,
Please Accept my humble obeisances.
Thank you for presenting your views. Just for clarity, my confidence in what I wrote is only because it is completely backed by Bhadra Charu prabhu's personal instructions.
However, I would like to humbly ask just for my own knowledge any quotes of Prabhupada where HDG equates deity service to a trailer of a film which would lead us to actual seva in Goloka.
Thank you for sharing and thank you for discussing, it helps everyone to grow and become a better devotee. We are here only to please Sri Guru and Gauranga.