Haribol, PAMHO
I have been reading Srila Praphupad's books for about two years now and mostly follow the four regulative principles. However, I find it hard to avoid committing sins when I am associating with family members who are very materially engrossed. Being around them seems to make me forget about my spirituality, or I use it as an excuse that since they are doing it, it can't be that bad for me to do it etc., or I rationalize that since I am around them and absorbing they're materialistic "vibes" there's not much point in trying to be disciplined myself. I sense the dishonesty in this and I think the truth is that my mind will give me any kind of rationale to give in to temptation and there's a part of me that wants to give into it. I have a pattern of being strict with myself one day and then the next day giving in to temptation, then begging Krishna's forgiveness, then having a day of strict adherance but giving in to temptation the next day etc. I know what I should and shouldn't do, but that doesn't seem to stop me from somehow getting caught up in mode of passion and doing sinful things because everyone else around me is doing it, or I feel bored and don't know what else to do with myself. Whatever the case, I am feeling that I can't continue like this because it is destroying my sanity and my integrity and I am really worried what the consequences will be.
If anybody is reading I would be grateful for any advice about how to deal with this situation. I am wondering if I need to stop associating with my family? I have talked to them about possibly moving into an ashram for an extended period and they were pretty understanding. My only dilemma is that since I have some student loan debts I need to be earning an income. I would ideally like to find someplace where I could earn a living while at the same time having the association of sadhus.
I would be grateful for any advice!
Thank you!
Hare Krishna
Replies
Hare Krishna Daniel Prabhuji,
PAMHO. It is good that you are following the 4 regulative principles.Associating with unKC family is a tough challenge, but then think why you got such family in the first place.Most likely due to previous karmas, right? You may not remember what they are , but nevertheless they are making it tough for you now. So, please ask (rather beg) for Krishna's mercy and keep asking and begging for giving you strength and wisdom to deal with the situation first.Cutting ties with family is no good, especially if you are a student, because this means you have just stepped into youth.Now is the time to repay your debt to your parents. At this time if you 'run away' , this may generate more karma for you.
Moving into an ashram is excellent, but only for those who have truly renounced the world;not when one is trying to avoid a situation.
Could you cite few examples of the 'sinful things' that you say end up doing with just because of your association with them?
Hare Krishna!
"There will be pain. But in order to achieve something higher we have to sacrifice something lesser."
That makes me think that part of the reason I keep going back to my parent's and taking their association is that it feels comfortable and neutral and safe. But it's also not reality... and I know that reality involves intense pain and intense joy... intense feeling I guess and I'm trying to avoid feeling the pain, which means I'm just not feeling period. *sigh* That's for another post I guess!
Anyways, I know I can't change them and it would be disrespectful to try. I guess I'm just going to try to become more mindful about my interactions with them and limit them as much as possible.
Thank you!
Haribol
Then Prabhuji, try to present Your Mother some Vedic culinary books. i am sure She will love that.
Also some days in the lecture i heard something which is a new thing for me. one Devotee asked Maharja how to control our eating habits. Maharaja told that we should regulate and by the time it will be controlled. For example, we will eat at the same time, same quantity ...and by the time we won't to much attached to the food. but meal should be prepared perfectly.
Also did You tried to drink cow milk? Sometimes we get hungry not because of stomach but because our mind does not satisfied.
From food we get something subtle rather then only gross.
Each food has its own qualities and each person likes some particular food according to their nature.
For example, if in person's life there is lack of love he/she will have desire to eat sweets.
or if one lives or associates with ignorant people then there is desire to eat caffeine, tea...
if one is to much greedy likes too much fatty food....
in this way when we uplift our consciousness and put our mind in proper way we will desire to eat only food in the mode of goodness like: fruits, dairy products, grains...
It says there are all 6 tastes in cow milk. Because of that if we drink cow milk our mind gets satisfaction quickly.
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painful is not to leave material life, painful is to leave spiritual life.
Your servant,
Hari Bol!
Mata jee, please explain more about six tastes and food type.
Your post all of a sudden seems to open some new understanding for me.
Your servant,
Sharanagat
That is so interesting...
I agree about being very regulated... that does seem to make a big difference for me when I am able to do it. I am vata dosha so ritual and regularity is very important for me.
Yes, that would explain a lot...
I have this problem but I'm not really sure what do do about it at the moment!
Anyways, thanks for the advice. :-)
Haribol
hare krishna daniel prabhu...u can eat many things like puris or chappatis with homemade ghee it will not only increase ur weight but it should be offered to krishna before honourin it...you can also eat rice kheer an Indian sweet which is very easy to prepare and very delicious it is not tamsic in any sense as it is made of milk and rice...it is a favourite snack in an indian household or you can try gajar ka halwa a sweet made of carrots... I hope this helps you....and may Krishna and Guru lead you in the right path...Hare Krishna
Haribol!
Thanks for the information! I haven't had gajar ka halwa, I will have to try that. I do love kheer but I have to be careful about sugar I think... maybe I could use a sugar substitue... anyways, thanks for your thoughts and prayers!!
Hare Krishna
please forgive me if i said anythin wrong prabhuji... im just doin it in the service of Krishna and Srila Prabhupad and GuruMaharaj (H.H Jayapataka Swami Maharaj)...
hare krishna..
as i m very new and youg to advice any one but i just going to express my feeling here after reading your post.
we are born human being we have relations,boundations and many more responsibilities in life from beginning and we have to do it as our parents done for us.
we have to do our duties to our parents also as bu disobeying or neglect it we doing bad karma.
but as this is material world we have to follow KC.
i m sorry if i made mistake ,...
please forgive me..
hare krishna
Hare Krishna! Not at all :-) Much appreciated to have your ideas.
Yes... I think I know what you're saying... not trying to escape my life circumstances but rather purify my activities by dovetailing them to Krishna. It makes sense...
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