Hare Krishna,
mata jee i want your help,
i had done so many sinful & wrong activity in my privious life. what i do. when i chant & read all things flash back in front of me what i do plz help. i want some person who take me on right path.
plz reply mata jee no one help me!
Hare Krishna dear ... Mataji,
Please accept my humble obeisances!
All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
Please forgive me i could not answer to You on time because of technical problem with my e-mail.
We have to understand that all of us are too much degraded. Do not think that only You have done so many sins. So many great Personalities some how or other in previous lives had done sinful deeds. For example, the author of Ramayana, he was very big sinner, robber, killer...once he meet Narada Muni Spiritual Master. Narada Muni explained him spiritual knowledge and gave him order to chant the Names of Lord Rama. But the sinner could not pronounce even that Name. It is because of his sins he was not able to chant the Holy Names. Then Narada Muni told him to chant: "mara mara mara mara...."
He did so, by the time his sins were washed away and he could pronounce the Names directly as Rama.
Srila Prabhupada made drug users, cow meat eaters, drinkers...pure Devotees. How? By chanting the Holy Names.
If You see Your sins it is good, so that seeing them You will regret and beg for forgiveness. As like King Bharata was a great Devotee. In the end of his life left his kingdom, beautiful wife, wealth to the forest to be fully engaged in the service of the Lord.
But suddenly he saw a child deer and became attached to him. When king was dieing thought about that deer not about Krishna and in the next life took a body of a deer.
In the deer body he could remember his previous life and what wrong he has done. Knowing that he fully regretted and even thou in the body of a deer came to an ashrama of Devotees and used to listen the Vedic Hymns. In the next life took a body of a Brahmana and not loosing his second he fully practiced Krishna Consciousness. He understood that other then Holy Names nothing can help him.
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Try to pray, crying! If needed in Your mind hardly embrace the lotus feet of Lord Gouranga and beg Him for forgiveness. We can just pray and cry as a tiny child who lost his mother. We are not capable to do anything rather than cry and beg for mercy.
Dear... Mataji, hope this letter will help You somehow. If You need more help, please do not hesitate to write and ask. As Your servant, by the mercy of my Gurudev i ll try to help You.
Your servant, maral
Replies
First and the most thing You have to find friends i mean among Devotee girls, and try to keep distance with those who influence to You bad.
Secondly, do not fight with Your parents, even thou they against Your KC. Try to serve them, talk to them politely and pay to them obeisances.
Thirdly, regularly visit Temple programs, if needed visit also house programs.
Fourthly, with determination chant always attentively Your 16 rounds, also read Bhagavad Gita at least some pages daily.
Fifthly, i am sure there should be marriage boards in the Temples, You have to ask some senior Matajis. Girls in ISKCON do so, they take help from senior matajis in order to find suitable partner for grihastha ashram.
i am sure that there are Devotees who are from Brahmana casts.
Study nice also. And of course always pray to Krishna to help You and protect You.
Also here in the Audio section You may find lots of lectures about grihastha ashram, about Vaishnava etiquette. Listen them, gaining knowledge You will decide what to do.
if need more help, as You know i am here, by the mercy of Devotees and Guru will help You!
Your servant, maral
Hare Krishna dear ... Mataji, please accept my humble obeisances! All glories to Srila Prabhupada!
So Your parents say to You to marry some materialistic person? And You have done sin and now You are regretting, and that You have bad association.
First, please, let me know how old are You, what are You doing in life, how many rounds do You chant daily, do You have any friends among Devotee girls and do You follow all 4 regulative principles from when?
Are Your parents against Your Krishna Consciousness?
If You answer these basic questions, we will try to work out something which will help You.
Your servant, maral