Hare Krsna
Please accept my humble obeisance. All glories to Srila Prabhupada
Early in the morning, while I was scratching Srila Prabhupada's back, I asked him why he had changed his decision to go immediately. Srila Prabhupada said, "The vaidya has requested me to wait ten days. It says in the astrologer's report to consult a physician. So my physician says wait." I then asked Srila Prabhupada what his plan was. Srila Prabhupada said, "I want a green card because I plan to stay in America. I will not come back until completing the Bhagavatam. I want to organize there. The American boys are so nice: Adi-kesava, Ramesvara. If I make everything strong, then the movement will endure. I will organize in these places: Hawaii, Los Angeles, and the New York farm."
I had mentioned to Srila Prabhupada that Balavanta Prabhu had a friend with influence in the U.S. Immigration Department in Washington D.C. After Prabhupada talked with Balavanta, it was decided that Balavanta should take the green card and return immediately to the U.S. With the help of his friend, he would try to get it extended, although it had expired. Again, Prabhupada felt that he wanted to go immediately, without waiting for the difficult first week of September to pass. Srila Prabhupada said to me during his massage, "I am frustrated, fed up and disgusted. Let us go now. They will say four days, then the medicine takes a while to act, wait a little longer. This is their method." Prabhupada did not look well. The strain of trying to decide whether or not to go seemed to affect him. He seemed even weaker than usual.
All the G.B.C. discussed. Later in the afternoon, since Prabhupada had been unable to rest properly, we decided to first let Balavanta and Abhirama arrange for the passport and either the green card or the tourist visa. Then we would consider Prabhupada's leaving. If we told everyone we were coming and then changed our minds, it would be very upsetting and would jeopardize our visa positions here in India. Prabhupada considered our arguments and agreed to first wait for the passport and card. This changing decisions back and forth has been very difficult for His Divine Grace, since he is very weak. Such changes, even for a normal person, are mentally very exhausting.
Prabhupada moved upstairs in the evening and lay on his bed under the open verandah roof. When he called for "Tamala and the others," we came up, not knowing what change to expect now. Srila Prabhupada said, "Sit down. I want simply to see you all. It gives me vital force." Prabhupada looked upon us very mercifully and lovingly, as sundara-arati began. The air was filled with frankincense to keep away the mosquitoes. We all began to massage different parts of Prabhupada's body. Srutikirti and Satsvarupa each massaged a leg, and I massaged Prabhupada's head. Guru-krpa fanned the incense. Prabhupada lay peacefully with his eyes closed, attended by all of us. He looked more exhausted than usual. Srila Prabhupada said, "You all Vaisnavas be merciful to me."
I found Daivi-sakti at Bhagatji's house. She had been living in Varsana for five months. Although everyone preached to her, she would not change her decision to remain outside ISKCON. I decided to bring her before Srila Prabhupada because she said that if Prabhupada told her to come back, she would. Prabhupada dealt very mercifully with her, just as a father. He told her not to live outside ISKCON.
Biographies and Glorifications of Srila Prabhupada-TKG's Diary: Prabhupada's Final Days-August 19th-Tamala Krsna Goswami
Comments