Relax Your Way Through Life

 
By Achyut Gopal Das
 
We all have problems in life, that's given but the question is - how do we deal with them? Generally when faced with difficulties, we panic and stress out, but this doesn't solve the problem rather aggravates it. The best way to deal with our problems is by being calm. How can one remain calm amidst problems? That's a question of practice. The point is unless we are calm we will not be able to see the problem for what it is, what to speak of solving it. Just like if a pond is agitated we can't see our reflection, similarly we can't see the obvious as long as our mind remains agitated. We always think that peace is obtained by solving our problems. That may be true but we forget that to solve our problems we need to be at peace first. This is something most of us don't get.
 
By being calm and relaxed in face of a difficulty, we are placing ourselves in the mode of goodness and only in goodness can solutions come forth because the symptoms of the mode of goodness are clarity and light. Sometimes the solution is right under our nose but we miss it, frantically searching for it everywhere. 

THE QUICKSAND EPISODE
There is a very interesting story from the life of Radhanath Swami that makes this point very clear. Meditating on this story has helped me better deal with my challenges. Radhanath Swami recounts in his memoir "The Journey Home" that one day as he was swimming in the Ganges, the waves of the river swept him to an empty, sandy bank. As he stepped on the sandy bank, he found out that it was not normal sand but quicksand. He struggled with all his might to pull himself out of it but the more he fought with it, the deeper he sank. He saw a thorny bush nearby which he firmly gripped and tried to extricate himself with full force. The result was that the bush got plucked from it's roots and his hand was bleeding badly. He let go of the useless bush, took a deep breath and relaxed. This is where the turning point occurs. As soon as he relaxed, he realized that if he was calm, the quicksand was less aggressive. He laid his torso flat on the sand and found that he could almost float in that position. Inch by inch, in slow motion he wormed his body out the quicksand into the river and he was free. 

CHOOSING OUR MODES WISELY
Do you think, anyone in a similar situation would have acted the same way? Not necessarily. Many would have frantically struggled and struggled. After all, one should never give up, right. One should never give up trying is perfect but how to try is also an art which these people never consider. This is typical of the mode of passion - frantically trying but never getting it. In fact, these people mess up the situation further. The other set of people who act from the platform of ignorance, will not even try. Seeing a huge challenge, they get paralyzed and give up. Both these kinds of people would have died in the quicksand. Radhanath Swami could save himself because he chose to act from the mode of goodness. We too have the choice to choose the mode from which we act and the mode we choose will determine the result.

SOLVING PROBLEMS FROM GOODNESS
How do we deal with a difficulty from the mode of goodness? By following a few simple things that Radhanath Swami followed in this situation. If we try to apply these simple techniques in our life situations, we will also be able to come out of the problems plaguing us. 

The first and the most important step that he took was to take a deep breath and relax. This is one of the boldest step - to be relaxed amidst chaos. We many times underestimate the value of small things. One deep breath at the time of difficulty can make a whole lot of difference. Generally when we go through a tough time, we breathe shallowly and enough oxygen doesn't reach our brains and we don't see any solutions. But when we breathe deeply and calmly, things become clearer, things we previously did not notice are now visible to us. Many times solution comes in very subtle hints but to catch it you have to be in a calm state. In a state of panic, your awareness of finer aspects of the situation are covered with the noise of the mind.Just like in this story, as soon as Radhanath Swami relaxed, it dawned on him that the quicksand is less aggressive if he was calm. It's not that the nature of quicksand changed when he calmed down, but it's nature was releaved to him, which he could now use for his benefit. Similarly in life, when we calm down and relax, we become aware of the exact nature of our problems and we are in a better position to deal with it.

The second thing which Radhanath Swami did was slowly, inch by inch pull himself out the quicksand. Similarly, we have to be patient and relaxed while we navigate through our crisis step by step. Most problems are not solved instantly. We need to take one step at a time in a peaceful state of mind. If we follow these simple tips, we can pull ourselves out of the quicksand of our problems. 

In conclusion, let us remind ourselves that we need not get stressed out about any problem in life because doing so doesn't serve us in anyway. If there one thing we need to learn - it is the ability to fully relax in life.....and it may all begin with a deep breath.
 
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