by Bhaktivinoda Thakura
naham vande tava caranayor-dvandvam advanda hetoh
kumbhipakam gurum api hare narakam napanetum
ramya-rama-mrdutanulata nandane nabhirastum
bhave bhave hrdaya-bhavane bhavayem bhavantam
"Prabhu, I am not performing bhajana so that You will remove the worldly misery which is strangling me. I am not praying at Your feet for entrance into the heavenly garden of Nandana-kanana where one can enjoy with beautiful women for a very long time, nor am I praying for liberation so that I will never again have to suffer for nine months in the womb of a mother and never again be punished by the messengers of Yamaraja. I pray that in the core of my heart You will increase the bhava of Vrndavana, where You are roaming with the gopis and enjoying amorous pastimes. In meditation on the descriptions of these pastimes, I will at once become completely lost in prema-this is what I am praying for. I am praying that I may take birth as a gopa or gopi, or even as a peacock or tree or anything, anywhere within the sixty-four squaremile Vraja-mandala. There I will acquire the company of a rasika devotee, who being full of the bhava of Vrndavana, will describe all of these pastimes to me, and then my life will be meaningful."
Comments