True Self Confidence is not based on our achievements or our successes in this material world, but it is based on the fulfillment of who we are, what our purpose is, and what we represent to ourselves, our families and to the world around us. If a person has such a Self Confidence, he can generate that confidence and faith in others. Actually to fail is not much of a loss. To lose ones character and integrity is a major loss to our inner self, it would surely prick somewhere deep inside our hearts. A person with proper disposition and attitude is willing to accept even a major failure in the eyes of the world in order to preserve the high values that he or she believes in. If we are willing to sell our ideals, our ethics, our character, our integrity, our soul for the adoration of this world, our so called Self Confidence will be built on a foundation of sand. It has no real substance and it can bring us no real fulfillment. Low Self Esteem is one of the biggest problems in the world. Not only for the apparent down driving people, but even for the people in high controlling positions.
Persons with low self esteem, are dependent on the appreciation and the appraise and the praise and approval of others. Where as a person with self confidence is willing to speak what is true or do what is right even it is very unpopular. Especially the youth in the world today. Association is such a powerful influence. Most people don’t smoke cigarettes or drink alcohol or do all of these illicit things simply because they really want to do it. They do it because they want to look cool. They want to be accepted by the people around them. But this is the age of Kali. To be accepted by the masses in the age of Kali means there is something seriously wrong with you. Integrity means we understand what is right and we do it even if people criticize us, even if people make jokes and laugh against us. Eventually those same people will come to us when they are in trouble. Because they understand here is a person with Integrity. Those with low self esteem are easily jealous of other people’s successes. Jealousy means we are so hollow, we are so empty within. There is a lack of fulfillment in our work, and our value and who we are. We actually have to feel a type of hatred and jealousy towards others who appears to be better.
A person with real Self Confidence is the well wisher of everyone, is not so concerned with one’s reputation, but concerned with one’s character. Is not so concerned with what one can get, and not so concerned with what one can prove to others by ones fashions, by one’s way of speaking, and by the way of talking, by the type of furniture one has in one’s home, but is more concerned with what they are giving to others. Actual self consciousness doesn’t mean that we become absorbed in our egoistic self. The art of real self consciousness is to become self less. Because in becoming self less there is inner fulfillment.
Let me share a beautiful story that will help us regain our trust in our own selves and we would stop questioning our self worth.
A man went to God and asked, "What's the value of life?" God gave him one stone and said, "Find out the value of this stone, but don't sell it."
The man took the stone to an Orange Seller and asked him what it's cost would be.
The Orange Seller saw the shiny stone and said, "You can take 12 oranges and give me the stone."
The man apologized and said that the God has asked him not to sell it.
He went ahead and found a vegetable seller. "What could be the value of this stone?" he asked the vegetable seller. The seller saw the shiny stone and said, "Take one sack of potatoes and give me the stone."
The man again apologized and said he can't sell it.
Further ahead, he went into a jewellery shop and asked the value of the stone.
The jeweler saw the stone under a lens and said, "I'll give you 50 Lakhs for this stone." When the man shook his head, the jeweler said, "Alright, alright, take 2 crores, but give me the stone."
The man explained that he can't sell the stone. Further ahead, the man saw a precious stone's shop and asked the seller the value of this stone.
When the precious stone's seller saw the big ruby, he lay down a red cloth and put the ruby on it. Then he walked in circles around the ruby and bent down and touched his head in front of the ruby.
"From where did you bring this priceless ruby from?" he asked. "Even if I sell the whole world, and my life, I won't be able to purchase this priceless stone.
Stunned and confused, the man returned to the God and told him what had happened. "Now tell me what is the value of life, God?
God said, "The answers you got from the Orange Seller, the Vegetable Seller, the Jeweler & the Precious Stone's Seller explain the value of our life... You may be a precious stone, even priceless, but people may value you based on their level of information, their belief in you, their motive behind entertaining you, their ambition, and their risk taking ability. But don't fear, you will surely find someone who will discern your true value."
In the eyes of God you are very very precious. Respect yourself. You are Unique. No one can Replace you!
By simply following the message of God, by following the regulative principles, we are assured of success. Simply by leading a sanctified life, we gradually develop a higher taste and thereby there is no cause of fear, no reason to feel depressed as no failure in our lives can dwindle our faith in His best plans for us, his dearmost children, since now we have the Supreme Lord on our side.
Since the Lord has given us this very rare human birth and made each of us very special, let us always stay true to the virtues and righteous principles that is prescribed in our Vedic scriptures, let us strive to remain fixed on the path of devotion by associating with saintly people, let us fervently pray to the Lord to help us to engage our minds and senses in the selfless service for the pleasure of the Supreme as that is the only way to achieve inner peace, fulfillment, become humble, build a powerful character and thus, develop self-confidence.
Article by:
H.G. Mathura Vasi Devi Dasi
(Meghna Choudhury)
E-Counselor
IskconDesireTree
www.iskcondesiretree.com/e-counseling
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