Blog

November 12 2005

Please help me now, Now being forced to live the temple I'm lost in pain and anger causing me to become bewildered. Not having any engagement is terrifying. Being a wife and mother trying my best was my service now that my children are all grown up that service is no longer needed and I have nothing to keep me engaged. I am so thankful for the time You have allowed me to live here in Srila Prabhupada house and do full time service. Because it's the nature for all living entity to be engaged. So if not properly engaged in service to KRSNA you will fine other ways to engage your self. To not be allowed to come and do any service and no family to care for. I have nothing to keep me engaged and it scares me to death. O my Lord I beg You to have mercy on me and give me the intelligence to know what I should do. I'm now feeling lost with no duration in this hellish world. Please do not let the hurt, anger and resentment kill my desire for devotional services to You. Help me see what ever You wish for me to do. I only pray to You to save me from this pain and fear of falling down even more. And let me always remember You.

Your lost servent