Patience

Next principle of education is that one should understand that character changes very slowly. No need to make something great out of your kids. They lived many life times prior to this life and cultivated particular type of character and because of that they are in some particular conditionings. If you see that with simple efforts you are not able to change a person then those efforts should be stopped. Suppose a man is scattered. You do big efforts but the person remains still scattered. Leave him, he will be scattered for whole life. Leave him. In order not to damage the relationship with him, you just easy on this. In order to take this easy one should understand that it is his fate to have such type of a child. Furthermore, if child have good memory, if he does not understand math or literature, if child is not able to do proper physical exercises, if something more he is not able to do. One may try to teach but if that is not happening then one should leave that, because he is not able to do something right from the previous life. Do you understand?

Give him chance to progress in that field in which he is qualified. This is the principle of unselfishness. This is the understanding of the fact that character changes very slowly.  In general, parents are not able to change the nature of their child. Generally they cannot. They will be able only to reveal what is positive in him. He will start to change himself after 13. Parents can reveal those qualities which can be revealed. Parents, thinking that they are the arbiters of his fate, try to change the character of the child. Because he is not doing anything till 13 he does not have any responsibility in life. All responsibility lays down on parents. Because of that nature won’t be changed at all. Person can change his nature by taking responsibilities in life. Because of that his character will start to be changed only after 13. Because of that you can reveal that which is already there within. You build a springboard from which he will pick up speed. There is need to be based on this. If parents do not use this knowledge then they will have big problems. Attempts to change the nature are similar with beating a head to a wall. More likely to be on the contrary, you smash your own forehead. This happens.

In Vedas it is said five things are predicted right from the time of birth and they are not changeable:

1. Life span
2. Type of job
3. Amount of wealth
4. Talents and knowledge
5. Time of death.

Because of that please do not try to change something from this. Though save money for him, or do not do so, though try to make a learned man out of him, or do not try to do that no matter nothing will happen. Because of that parents should try very hard to make their kids sincere persons. This is their duty. Another thing is that you give to your child right character traits and true knowledge. True knowledge is the experienced knowledge, practical knowledge. Realized knowledge will help parents to understand how to impact on child so that he become sincere, humble, loves hard work, responsible etc and start to respond to his life himself.

Responsibility for a woman is that she become chaste, desire to live within the family, but not outside of it and to cultivate qualities like kindness, obedience, ability to speak politely with the husband, do not blame him directly, but act in such a way so that he understands his mistakes himself and so on.

Man in his 20s should already know how to act in life, cultivate ability to act independently in any problems in life, to strive for spiritual knowledge, to know practical things, to have his own understanding of questions of life and ability to accept responsibilities in life. This difference will give tactics with which parents live. They do not live or making kids rich.

It should be understood: what goes around comes around. If idleness is cultivated in the family, the child grows up a bum. If laziness is cultivated in the family the child will grow lazy. If in the family parents have rough relationship to each other, the child grows as a snapper. If parents are not interested with each other and do not take care of anyone then child also will become like his parents.

 This text was translated from Russian book written by Devotee psychologist.