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MOTHER-IN-LAW‏ AND STEPMOTHER‏.‏

 

The five Pāṇḍavas married her as a common wife, and each of them begot a son in her. Mahārāja Yudhiṣṭhira begot a son named Pratibhit, Bhīmasena begot a son named Sutasoma, Arjuna begot Śrutakīrti, Nakula begot Śatānīka, and Sahadeva begot Śrutakarmā. She is described as a most beautiful lady, equal to her mother-in-law, Kuntī. During her birth there was an aeromessage that she should be called Kṛṣṇā. The same message also declared that she was born to kill many a kṣatriya. By dint of her blessings from Śaṅkara, she was awarded five husbands, equally qualified. When she preferred to select her own husband, princes and kings were invited from all the countries of the world. She was married with the Pāṇḍavas during their exile in the forest, but when they went back home Mahārāja Drupada gave them immense wealth as a dowry. She was well received by all the daughters-in-law of Dhṛtarāṣṭra. When she was lost in a gambling game, she was forcibly dragged into the assembly hall, and an attempt was made by Duḥśāsana to see her naked beauty, even though there were elderly persons like Bhīṣma and Droṇa present. She was a great devotee of Lord Kṛṣṇa, and by her praying, the Lord Himself became an unlimited garment to save her from the insult.

(Srimad Bhagavatam-------1:13:3-4.---------purport).

Even though the gopīs who were friends of Rohiṇī and Mother Yaśodā and who allowed their breasts to be sucked by Kṛṣṇa were not directly Kṛṣṇa's mothers, they all had the same chance as Rohiṇī and Yaśodā to go back to Godhead and act as Kṛṣṇa's mothers-in-law, servants and so on. The word saṁsāra refers to attachment for one's body, home, husband or wife, and children, but although the gopīs and all the other inhabitants of Vṛndāvana had the same affection and attachment for husband and home, their central affection was for Kṛṣṇa in some transcendental relationship, and therefore they were guaranteed to be promoted to Goloka Vṛndāvana in the next life, to live with Kṛṣṇa eternally in spiritual happiness. The easiest way to attain spiritual elevation, to be liberated from this material world, and to go back home, back to Godhead, is recommended by Bhaktivinoda Ṭhākura: kṛṣṇera saṁsāra kara chāḍi' anācāra.

(Srimad Bhagavatam-------10:6:39-40.---------purport).

One day Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī was churning yogurt for Kṛṣṇa. At that time the jeweled bangles on Her hands were circling around, and She was also chanting the holy name of Kṛṣṇa. All of a sudden She thought, "I am chanting the holy name of Kṛṣṇa, and My superiors—My mother-in-law and My sister-in-law—may hear Me!" By this thought Rādhārāṇī became over-anxious. This is an instance of feeling guilty because of devotion to Kṛṣṇa.

One day the beautiful-eyed Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī entered into the forest to collect some flowers to prepare a garland for Kṛṣṇa. While collecting the flowers, She became afraid that someone might see Her, and She felt some fatigue and weakness. This is an instance of guilty feelings caused by labor for Kṛṣṇa.

There is a statement in Rasa-sudhākara that after passing the night with Kṛṣṇa, Rādhārāṇī became so weak that She was unable to get up from bed.

(Nectar of Devotion).

In the Vidagdha-mādhava, Jaṭilā, the mother-in-law of Rādhārāṇī, began to criticize Kṛṣṇa in this way: "Kṛṣṇa, You are standing here, and Rādhārāṇī, who has just been married to my son, is also standing here. Now I know both of You very well, so why should I not be very anxious to protect my daughter-in-law from Your dancing eyes?" This is an instance of dishonorable words used to indirectly criticize Kṛṣṇa.

Similarly, some of the gopīs once began to address Kṛṣṇa with these dishonorable words: "My dear Kṛṣṇa, You are a first-class thief. So please leave this place immediately. We know You love Candrāvalī more than us, but there is no use in praising her in our presence! Kindly do not contaminate the name of Rādhārāṇī in this place!" This is another instance of dishonorable words cast upon Kṛṣṇa in ecstatic love.

(Nectar of Devotion).

Instead, please tell Me how I can save Myself from these terrible attacks of Kṛṣṇa!"

Sometimes among contemporary personalities there are signs of ecstasy in anger because of love for Kṛṣṇa. An example of such anger was exhibited in a quarrel between Jaṭilā and Mukharā. Jaṭilā was the mother-in-law of Rādhārāṇī, and Mukharā was Her great-grandmother. Both of them were talking about Kṛṣṇa's unnecessary harassment of Rādhārāṇī when She was walking on the street. Jaṭilā said, "You cruel-faced Mukharā! By hearing your words my heart feels like it is burning in a fire!" And Mukharā replied, "You sinful Jaṭilā, by hearing your words, there is aching in my head! You cannot give any evidence that Kṛṣṇa has attacked Rādhārāṇī, the daughter of my granddaughter Kīrtidā."

Once, when Rādhārāṇī was taking off the necklace given to Her by Kṛṣṇa, Jaṭilā, her mother-in-law, told a friend, "My dear friend, just see the beautiful necklace that Kṛṣṇa has presented to Rādhārāṇī.

(Nectar of Devotion).

Lord Kṛṣṇa delightfully offered His respects and obeisances to Kuntī and other elder ladies of the palace. His younger sister, Subhadrā, was also standing there with Draupadī, and both offered their respectful obeisances unto the lotus feet of the Lord. At the indication of her mother-in-law, Draupadī brought clothing, ornaments and garlands, and with this paraphernalia they received the queens Rukmiṇī, Satyabhāmā, Bhadrā, Jāmbavatī, Kālindī, Mitravindā, Lakṣmaṇā and the devoted Satyā. These principal queens of Lord Kṛṣṇa were first received, and then the other queens were also offered a proper reception. King Yudhiṣṭhira arranged for Kṛṣṇa's rest and saw to it that all who came along with Him—namely His queens, soldiers, ministers and secretaries—were comfortably situated. He had arranged that they would experience a new feature of reception every day while staying as guests of the Pāṇḍavas.

(Krsna Book).

It appears that Vasudeva, the father of Lord Kṛṣṇa, had completely separate residential quarters where he lived with his eighteen wives, out of whom Śrīmatī Devakī is the real mother of Lord Kṛṣṇa. But in spite of this, all other stepmothers were equally affectionate to Him, as will be evident from the following verse. Lord Kṛṣṇa also did not distinguish His real mother from His stepmothers, and He equally offered His obeisances unto all the wives of Vasudeva present on the occasion. According to scriptures also, there are seven mothers: (1) the real mother, (2) the wife of the spiritual master, (3) the wife of a brāhmaṇa, (4) the wife of the king, (5) the cow, (6) the nurse, and (7) the earth. All of them are mothers. Even by this injunction of the śāstras, thestepmother, who is the wife of the father, is also as good as the mother because the father is also one of the spiritual masters. Lord Kṛṣṇa, the Lord of the universe, plays the part of an ideal son just to teach others how to treat their stepmothers.

(Srimad Bhagavatam--------1:11:28--------purport).
 
 
When Lord Kṛṣṇa was at Vṛndāvana even the cows would become moistened by affection towards Him, and He would draw milk from the nipples of every affectionate living being, so what to speak of the stepmothers who were already as good as His own mother.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------1:11:29--------purport).
 
 
When he was only five years old, Prince Dhruva, a great devotee and the son of Mahārāja Uttānapāda, was sitting on the lap of his father. His stepmother did not like the King's patting her stepson, so she dragged him out, saying that he could not claim to sit on the lap of the King because he was not born out of her womb. The little boy felt insulted by this act of his stepmother. Nor did his father make any protest, for he was too attached to his second wife. After this incident, Prince Dhruva went to his own mother and complained. His real mother also could not take any step against this insulting behavior, and so she wept. The boy inquired from his mother how he could sit on the royal throne of his father, and the poor queen replied that only the Lord could help him. The boy inquired where the Lord could be seen, and the queen replied that it is said that the Lord is sometimes seen by great sages in the dense forest. The child prince decided to go into the forest to perform severe penances in order to achieve his objective.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------2:7:8--------purport).
 
 
Vidura's inquiry was about the youngest brothers of the Pāṇḍavas, namely Nakula and Sahadeva. These twin brothers were sons of Mādrī, the stepmother of the other Pāṇḍavas. But although they were stepbrothers, because Kuntī took charge of them after the departure of Mādrī with her husband Mahārāja Pāṇḍu, Nakula and Sahadeva were as good as the other three Pāṇḍavas, Yudhiṣṭhira, Bhīma and Arjuna. The five brothers are known in the world as regular brothers. The three elder Pāṇḍavas took care of the younger brothers, just as the eyelid takes care of the eye. Vidura was anxious to know whether, after winning back their own kingdom from the hands of Duryodhana, the younger brothers were still living happily under the care of the elder brothers.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:1:39--------purport).
 
 
The context of the reference given herein regarding Garuḍa and Indra is this. Once upon a time, Garuḍa, the carrier of the Lord, snatched away a nectar pot from the hands of the demigods in heaven in order to liberate his mother, Vinatā, from the clutches of his stepmother, Kadrū, the mother of the serpents. On learning of this, Indra, the King of heaven, hurled his thunderbolt against Garuḍa. With a view to respect the infallibility of Indra's weapon, Garuḍa, though otherwise invincible, being the Lord's own mount, dropped one of his wings, which was shattered to pieces by the thunderbolt. The inhabitants of higher planets are so sensible that even in the process of fighting they observe the preliminary rules and regulations of gentleness. In this case, Garuḍa wanted to show respect for Indra; since he knew that Indra's weapon must destroy something, he offered his wing.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:19:14--------purport).
 
 
The harsh words used by Suruci to her stepson were true because unless one is favored by the Supreme Personality of Godhead one cannot achieve any success in life. Man proposes, God disposes. Sunīti, the mother of Dhruva Mahārāja, agreed with her co-wife's advice that Dhruva engage himself in the worship of the Supreme Personality of Godhead. Indirectly, the words of Suruci were a benediction for Dhruva Mahārāja, for because of the influence of his stepmother's words, he became a great devotee.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:8:19--------purport).
 
 
Sunīti cited the example of Lord Brahmā, who was Dhruva Mahārāja's great-grandfather. Although Lord Brahmā is also a living being, by his penance and austerity he acquired the exalted position of creator of this universe by the mercy of the Supreme Lord. To become successful in any attempt, one not only has to undergo severe penances and austerities, but also must be dependent on the mercy of the Supreme Personality of Godhead. This indication had been given to Dhruva Mahārāja by his stepmother and was now confirmed by his own mother, Sunīti.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:8:20--------purport).
 
 
The system of bhakti-yoga described by Queen Sunīti to her son is the standard way of God realization. Everyone can continue in his constitutional occupational duties and at the same time keep the Supreme Personality of Godhead within his heart. This was also instructed by the Lord Himself to Arjuna in Bhagavad-gītā: "Go on fighting, but keep Me within your mind." That should be the motto of every honest person seeking perfection in Kṛṣṇa consciousness. In this connection, Queen Sunīti advised her son that the Supreme Personality of Godhead is known as bhṛtya-vatsala, which indicates that He is very kind to His devotees. She said, "You came to me crying, having been insulted by your stepmother, but I am unable to do any good for you. But Kṛṣṇa is so kind to His devotees that if you go to Him, then the combined kindness of millions of mothers like me will be surpassed by His affectionate and tender dealings. When everyone else fails to mitigate one's misery, Kṛṣṇa is able to help the devotee." Queen Sunīti also stressed that the process of approaching the Supreme Personality of Godhead is not easy, but is sought after by great sages who are very advanced in spiritual realization.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:8:22--------purport).
 
 
Both the mother and the son were lamenting Dhruva Mahārāja's having been insulted by his stepmother and his father's not having taken any step on this issue. But mere lamentation is useless—one should find out the means to mitigate one's lamentation. Thus both mother and son decided to take shelter of the lotus feet of the Lord because that is the only solution to all material problems. It is indicated in this connection that Dhruva Mahārāja left his father's capital city to go to a secluded place to search out the Supreme Personality of Godhead. It is the instruction of Prahlāda Mahārāja also that if one is seeking peace of mind he should free himself from all contamination of family life and take shelter of the Supreme Godhead by going to the forest. To the Gauḍīya Vaiṣṇava this forest is the forest of Vṛndā, or Vṛndāvana. If one takes shelter of Vṛndāvana under Vṛndāvaneśvarī, Śrīmatī Rādhārāṇī, certainly all the problems of his life are solved very easily.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:8:24--------purport).
 
 
Ordinarily if a child is rebuked as a rascal or fool, he smiles and does not take such insulting words very seriously. Similarly, if words of honor are offered, he does not appreciate them. But in the case of Dhruva Mahārāja, the kṣatriya spirit was so strong that he could not tolerate a slight insult from his stepmother which injured his kṣatriya prestige.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:8:27--------purport).
 
 
There are various classes of men. One class is called akāmīs, referring to those who have no material desire. Desire must exist, either material or spiritual. Material desire arises when one wants to satisfy one's personal senses. One who is ready to sacrifice anything to satisfy the Supreme Personality of Godhead can be said to have spiritual desire. Dhruva did not accept the instruction given by the great saint Nārada because he thought himself unfit for such instruction, which prohibited all material desires. It is not a fact, however, that those who have material desires are prohibited from worshiping the Supreme Personality of Godhead. This is the essential instruction from the life of Dhruva. He frankly admitted that his heart was full of material desires. He was very much affected by the cruel words of his stepmother, whereas those who are spiritually advanced do not care about anyone's condemnation or adoration.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:8:35--------purport).
 
 
It is said that the heart or mind is just like an earthen pot; once broken, it cannot be repaired by any means. Dhruva Mahārāja gave this example to Nārada Muni. He said that his heart, having been pierced by the arrows of his stepmother's harsh words, felt so broken that nothing seemed valuable but his desire to counteract her insult. His stepmotherhad said that because he was born from the womb of Sunīti, a neglected queen of Mahārāja Uttānapāda, Dhruva Mahārāja was not fit to sit either on the throne or on his father's lap. In other words, according to his stepmother, he could not be declared king. Dhruva Mahārāja's determination, therefore, was to become king of a planet exalted even beyond that possessed by Lord Brahmā, the greatest of all the demigods.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:8:36--------purport).
 
 
One cannot argue, "How is it that Dhruva Mahārāja, who was prevented from getting up on the lap of his father, could press down the whole earth?" This argument is not very much appreciated by the learned, for it is an example of nagna-mātṛkā logic. By this logic one would think that because his mother in her childhood was naked, she should remain naked even when she is grown up. The stepmother of Dhruva Mahārāja might have been thinking in a similar way: since she had refused to allow him to get up on the lap of his father, how could Dhruva perform such wonderful activities as pressing down the whole earth? She must have been very surprised when she learned that Dhruva Mahārāja, by concentrating constantly on the Supreme Personality of Godhead within his heart, could press down the entire earth, like an elephant who presses down the boat on which it is loaded.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:8:79--------purport).
 
 
Dhruva Mahārāja came to the forest to search out the Supreme Personality of Godhead with a revenging spirit against his stepmother. His stepmother had insulted Dhruva, who was not an ordinary person, but a great Vaiṣṇava. An offense at the lotus feet of a Vaiṣṇava is the greatest offense in this world. Because of having insulted Dhruva Mahārāja, Suruci would become mad upon the death of her son and would enter a forest fire, and thus her life would be ended. This was specifically mentioned by the Lord to Dhruva because he was determined for revenge against her. From this we should take the lesson that we should never try to insult a Vaiṣṇava. Not only should we not insult a Vaiṣṇava, but we should not insult anyone unnecessarily.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:9:23--------purport).
 
 
When Dhruva Mahārāja became situated on the vasudeva platform due to seeing the Lord face to face, all his material contamination was cleared. Thus he became ashamed of what his demands were and what he had achieved. He was very much ashamed to think that although he had gone to Madhuvana, giving up the kingdom of his father, and he had gotten a spiritual master like Nārada Muni, he was still thinking of revenge against his stepmother and wanted to occupy an exalted post within this material world. These were the causes for his moroseness even alter he received all the desired benedictions from the Lord.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:9:29--------purport).
 
 
The Lord fulfilled all Dhruva Mahārāja's desires. His revengeful attitude towards his stepmother and stepbrother was satisfied, his desire for a more exalted position than that of his great-grandfather was also fulfilled, and at the same time, his eternal position in Dhruvaloka was fixed. Although Dhruva Mahārāja's achievement of an eternal planet was not conceived of by him, Kṛṣṇa thought, "What will Dhruva do with an exalted position within this material world?" Therefore He gave Dhruva the opportunity to rule this material world for thirty-six thousand years with unchangeable senses and the chance to perform many great sacrifices and thus become the most reputed king within this material world. And, after finishing with all this material enjoyment, Dhruva would be promoted to the spiritual world, which includes the Dhruvaloka.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:9:29--------purport).
 
 
As far as Dhruva Mahārāja was concerned, he saw the Supreme Lord personally after only six months of practice in devotional service. He expected, therefore, that as soon as he met the Supreme Lord, the Lord would take him to His abode immediately, without waiting. Dhruva Mahārāja could understand very clearly that the Lord had offered him the rule of the world for thirty-six thousand years because in the beginning he was under the spell of the material energy and wanted to take revenge against his stepmother and rule over his father's kingdom. Dhruva Mahārāja greatly lamented his propensity for ruling the material world and his revengeful attitude towards other living entities.
(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:9:30--------purport).
 
 
 

Now Dhruva Mahārāja regretted very much that he had neglected these instructions. Nārada Muni had asked him, "Why should you bother about insult or adoration from your stepmother?" He of course said to Dhruva Mahārāja that since Dhruva was only a child, what did he have to do with such insult or adoration? But Dhruva Mahārāja was determined to achieve the benediction of the Supreme Personality of Godhead, and therefore Nārada advised him to go back home for the time being, and in mature time he could try to practice devotional service. Dhruva Mahārāja regretted that he had rejected the advice of Nārada Muni and was adamant in asking him for something perishable, namely revenge against his stepmother for her insult, and possession of the kingdom of his father.

(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:9:32--------purport).

 

 

It may be questioned why Dhruva Mahārāja offered his respect not only to his mother but also to his stepmother, due to whose insults he had to leave home. The answer is that after achieving perfection by self-realization and seeing the Supreme Personality of Godhead face to face, Dhruva Mahārāja was completely freed from all contamination of material desire. Feelings of insult or honor in this material world are never perceived by a devotee. Lord Caitanya therefore says that one has to be humbler than the grass and, He recommends, more tolerant than the tree to execute devotional service. Dhruva Mahārāja, therefore, has in this verse been described as saj-janāgraṇīḥ, the foremost of noble men. The pure devotee is the noblest of all, and he has no feelings of animosity towards anyone. Duality due to animosity is a creation of this material world. There is no such thing in the spiritual world, which is the absolute reality.

(Srimad Bhagavatam--------3:9:45--------purport).

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  • Volunteer
    Pranam Dearest Matajis and Prabhujis. Hare Krishna.
    May you receive transcendental blessings, grace and
    mercy from the God of Gods, the God of love, the Lord
    of Lords, the God  of  all  the  mystics, the  Supreme
    Personality of Godhead, Lord Krishna. He is  the ultimate
    sanctuary of  this manifested cosmic world. He is the
    Master of limitless might. He is inexhaustible time. He
    is seated in everyone`s heart, and  from  Him  comes 
    remembrance, knowledge and forgetfulness. The things
    you should know about worry. Worry is to tear yourself
    with deep concern, anxiety, uneasiness, fear, agitation,
    tension, and apprehension.  Worry makes your mind
    unsteady. Worry causes you to be in turmoil. Worry
    annoys you and tires you out. Worry distracts you  and
    disturbs you. Worry causes you to lose your peace of
    mind. Worry destroys your present happiness. Worry
    can drive you mad. Worry can kill you. Worry can make
    your hair grey more quickly. Worry does not really solve
    any useful purpose. Worry is not a good influence on
    your behaviour. Worry, being a negative emotion, will
    leave you  if you stop being negative and fill your mind
    with positive thoughts and good feelings. You have to
    control your worry, otherwise, your worry will control
    you.  It is not advisable to worry about things which
    may never happen. You will  not get  anything good
    through worry. It is not worth it to worry about tomorrow. 
    Tomorrow has not come yet. And it is a waste of energy
    to worry about what happened yesterday or some other
    time in the past. The past is gone. Remember, worry comes
    from the mind when you identify with the mind. Then the
    mind uses you. It plays games with you. It blocks your vision.
    You cannot see things clearly and rightly. It blocks your
    judgement. It blocks your relationships.  When you are
    about to worry, bring Lord Krishna to your remembrance.
    The remembrance of Lord Krishna is the greatest thing in
    life. Lord Krishna bless you with life today.  Live today.
    Think about today. Yes, make preparations for tomorrow,
    but do not worry about tomorrow. Put your trust in Lord
    Krishna.  Depend upon Him.  Have confidence in Him. 
    Surrender yourself unto Him. Take Lord Krishna as your
    shelter. Have faith in Lord Krishna. Do your best today
    and leave the rest to Lord Krishna. With love and best wishes,
    take care. bye.    
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