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Jokes in Words

Hare Krishna dear Devotees, please accept my humble obeisances! All glories to Srila Prabhupada!

Here we will share funny anecdotes - in Krishna Conscious in words only! When this discussion will have too many pages we will create the similar discussion page with the title "Jokes in Words - 2"



Let's make Devotees happy in Krishna Conscious way!!! Thank You!

Your humble servant,

 

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  • MOST FAMOUS MAN WHO EVER LIVED 
    One day many years ago at a school in South London a teacher said to the class of 5-year-olds, "I'll give $20 to the child who can tell me who was the most famous man who ever lived." 
    An Irish boy put his hand up and said, "It was St. Patrick." The teacher said, "Sorry Alan, that's not correct." 
    Then a Scottish boy put his hand up and said, "It was St. Andrew." The teacher replied, "I'm sorry, Hamish, that's not right either. 
    Finally, an Indian boy raised his hand and said, "It was Jesus Christ." The teacher said, "That's absolutely right, Jayant, come up here and I'll give you the $20." 
    As the teacher was giving Jayant his money, she said, "You know Jayant, since you are Indian, I was very surprised you said Jesus Christ." Jayant replied, "Yes, in my heart I knew it was Lord Krishna, but business is business!" 

  • good one...hahah

  • Volunteer

    Just because of one mistake million books were sold.

    And that mistake was on the title of the book:

    "The idea that can change your wife"

    Where as the correct one should be:

    "The idea that can change your life"

  • Volunteer

    Once woman teacher asked the class one enigma for solution:

    Teacher: Frog is making sound; boat is floating; price of tomato is 20 Rs; So what is my age?

    No one in the classroom answered. But after some time one boy raised his hand and told.

    Boy: 32

    Teacher: Wow! How You know?

    Boy: my sister is 16 she is half mad.

    from the lecture of HG Gour Gopal Prabhu, London 

  • Volunteer

    Once Krishna saw a very old and ugly lady in the forest of Vrindavan and wanted to play on her with His jokes.

    So He spoke: Oh old Lady, You are as beautiful as a monkey! It seems You are roaming around searching for a suitable match for Yourself to get married! For a monkey as like You Yourself. I am afraid Your search will take much time. 

    Old Lady: No, my Lord! No need for me to search for a suitable monkey for myself because I already found Him. And that is You - my Monkey roaming in the forest. 

    From the Srimad Bhagavatam Lecture of HG Baladev Prabhu at Sri Sri Radha Gopinath Mandir, Chowpatty, Mumbai

    • not good joke

  • Volunteer

    At the lecture:

    HG Srinathji Prabhu: Do You know why we say to catch the lotus Feet of Krishna?

    Devotees: mmmmmm

    HG Srinathji Prabhu: We catch the lotus Feet of someone so that HE DOES NOT RUN AWAY FROM US!

    Everyone laughs and uploads.

    Srimad Bhagavatam lecture at Sri Sri Radha Gopinath Mandir, Chowpatty, January, 2014 

  • Lots of jokes on Mayavadis:

    jokes on mayavada word.doc

  • Volunteer

    There was a cartoon in some newspaper that depicted an old lady and her husband sitting face to face. The lady is requesting her husband, "Chant, chant, chant." And the husband is answering, "Can't, can't, can't." So in this same way, we are requesting everyone, "Please chant, chant, chant." But they are replying, "Can't, can't, can't." This is their misfortune. Still, it is our duty to make all such unfortunate creatures fortunate. That is our mission. Therefore we go into the street and chant. Although they say, "Can't," we go on chanting.

    - Teachings of Queen Kunti

  • Volunteer

    There is only one child in the whole world which is perfect. And that is MY child.

    And there is only one wife in the whole world which if perfect. And that is my Neighbor's wife.

    (material world).

    from the lecture of Gour Gopal Prabhu, ISKCON Chowpatty.

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