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I am working in a private organisation. But salary is not enough so that i can make life of my parents comfort. They are living in a very low class 2 rooms on rent. In rainy season water falls from roof in the room. They are bearing summer and winter as the house is open.They are living with other tenatns as well.

I want a government job so that i can help them and i also living on rent i have to buy a house. In my present organisation i didn't find any exposure my knowledge is very less. I want government job so that peacefully i can do work and help my parents and my family. Please pray to god and ask him not to give more problems so that we can enjoy spritualness.

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  • Hare Krishna,
    Hmm I want to tell you something Parul mata ji..
    I was like you. complaining, worrying ..thinking all the time I am the victim and all are enjoying at my cost taking advantage of me.
    I have been like this for many years.. I complained about all to every person I met. it was giving me some kinda pleasure also that they are showing me sympathy.
    When all people around me started to give deaf ear to my suffering ...they said, even we faced whats new???
    I felt its time now I must tell about my suffering to none other than God.
    I one day started telling about my problems to God. I cried everyday and said You don't even listen to me. Even with God I had problems that He wont respond back.
    One day God responded and said why do keep telling me your problems? How am I responsible for it???
    Its your karma that you are facing...
    I felt sad that even God also wont listen to me. Then God said I am fed up listening to your issues now.. I wont listen to you at all. Get ME cotton balls I will plug it into my ears.
    You go on keep on ranting. He even added you know there are my best devotees who just think about ME and care less for for themselves. There are devotees of ME who are always thinking about Me. I only love them. Who are selflessly thinking about Me all the time. They are always complaining and worrying not about themselves but complaining and worrying about ME, that am I safe, Am I happy. I love only those devotees.. I care for them most. He said
    I said no no...I wont make you go deaf....instead let me plug my ears with the cotton. From today I wont listen to the things going around me.. so that I wont ever complain to you.
    He said thats better. Do it now.
    From that day i never complained about my issues with anyone or even God also. Atleast I want to give HIM peace of mind.
    Even if you don't have peace of mind.....giving peace of mind to other members in your family.. is a selfless trait.
    Lord will love when you do so.
    DON't feel great about your service to them.. Feel happy your material body is useful for someone. Even if you have to face 1000 problems also.. if you are able to give happiness to atleast one member in ur family ( mother in law ) in your case.. You will be rewarded for that by Lord..
    Have patience and get over this bad phase of life..... face it bravely have faith in Lord.
    I learnt a good lesson that day. That Lord cares only those who care less for themselves and more for others. Lord Krishna loves only those people who are selflessly worrying for HIM not for themselves..
    If you want Lord Krishna's help.. You should stop worrying about everything around and be happy that you are now under Krishna's protection and nothing will ever happen bad to you.
    Hare Krishna.
    TURN YOUR WORRY INTO WORSHIP AND WATCH HOW KRISHNA TURNS YOUR BATTLES INTO BLESSINGS...
  • E-Counselor
    Hare KRsna Mataji,

    PAMHO.
    I appreciate your concern to take care of your parents. However, your concern is material, there is no element of spirituality in it. Where has it been mentioned that if you are on spiritual path, material problems will disappear? It is simply said that one gets the strength, perspective and energy to overcome material problems on the basis of spiritual knowledge, growth and strength.
    If you want to pursue spirituality, that too devotion to Krsna, which is the highest goal for any living entity, then this is not the approach.
    In your previous post, you have mentioned about a monster in law. You need to learnt to deal with her in such a manner that your peace of mind is not disturbed. All the while, you have to do your sadhana as well as your responsibilities of taking care of family, child and job. You are doing all this mataji, but the consciousness is not centred around Krsna yet. You need to work on that aspect better.
    Since you are earning, you must make it a practice to take out some money for charity - even if is only Rs. 100. There are always less fortunate souls like us, we have to be cognizant of this fact. That money we have to spend in Krsna Conscious activity (not giving in alms or any other social service). Apart from that, please take out an amount and give your parents every month. THis is regardless of your family's demands and protests. In hindi, there is a saying - jiski laathi, uski bhains. Meaning the one who has the stick in hand will have the buffalo. Since you are the only earning member in your sasural, convert that to your advantage and call the shots. Be smart, not emotional.
    Please remember one thing - whatever suffering we experience in this lifetime, it is our own karma only. Nobody can suffer another's karma.
    If what i am saying is making sense to you, then only i will tell you more.

    Haribol,
    Your servant,
    Radha Rasamayi DD
    • Today morning i made lunch and prashad for Ganeshji. I sit to eat breakfast just then my baby starts potty. MY husband asks my mother to clean it as i was taking breakfast and had only 10 min to leave for office. My mother in law denied by saying that she has to do puja now. My husband and mother in law starts arguing. Then i get up and clean my child. I am earning for them and come for office hungry as i had no time for breakfast i was cleaning my child. Don't know why god doesn't punish such kind of people. God doesn't say that leave all works and come for me. Even they teach us to fulfill all responsibilities with my devotion.
      • I just want to know whether she is right in her doings?
        • E-Counselor
          It doesn't matter whether she is right or not. What matters is your karma. I read this story in the earlier post. If she is not willing to clean the child, let your husband clean the child. You eat and go on time.
          You are getting into a trap of "she and me". Try to rise above that and concentrate on what is important. You have limited time and energy, don't waste on her. I know it hurts how she is behaving, but you are reacting. You have to stop reacting and start responding. Then only you will be effective.
          Haribol,
          Your servant
          • It hurts me a lot. She is selfish lady. I am keeping them without any ill motive. Supporting the family. She lives the way she likes. Waste food of the house. Like in the morning if some aata is left in the fridge she doesn't care and the next day aata becomes khatta and i have to throw it out. She rushes to the temple in the evening. Eats lavish dinner in the mandir but when only dal chawal is served doesnt't eat. I am so depressed and anger have in my mind that i am not getting peace i just want to slap her beat her abuse her. She is such a cheap lady i really don't like her. She just wants money doesn't care whether her son is in problem or not.
            • E-Counselor
              I completely understand mataji. That is why I am saying be effective. You also know you cannot do anything that you have mentioned to her and she also knows. She is deliberately trying to give you pain. You will be winner if you are not in pain, are still doing all your duties and having peace of mind.

              You have the advantage of knowing her weakness - money. And you are the earning member in the family. So if you are effective, you will control her and not vice versa. Stop all sources of money reaching her. Keep some money for your parents and ensure it reaches them. Do not take financial responsibility of your sasural more than you are comfortable, whatever it may be.
              Do not tolerate her abuses - tick her off. All this you have to do calmly. The moment you get angry, you will lose control over yourself and she will know how to twist you. Ensure that you don't take her help for your child, if required keep a maid. Let her understand, without your saying so, that she is dependent on you. You are not dependent on her for anything.
              Next time you throw aata because it has gone bad, create a hulla over it - it costs money, which is earned through hard work. And ensure that there is no food in the fridge at night. If there is food and she goes out, next day don't cook for her. Make her realise that if she is responsible for the food that goes waste.
              Calm down mataji. Learn to manage the situation. From your side, always be mindful that you will not do anything wrong, how much ever painful it is. Always be on the right side of duty - always take care of your karma.
              The day you realise that its not between you and her, its between you and Krsna, its between her and Krsna, you will stop feeling so angry. What she does is her karma, YOu take care of your karma mataji.
              And chant chant chant. All the time chant. That is the only choice we have in our life. You will pass through this dear. Have faith.
              This situation has come to you to teach you some lesson. Lean the lesson fast.
              Haribol.
              • Today is Radhashtami...I got up as usual 5.45am in the morning to get ready for the office and to prepare food for the family. When i get i saw my mother in law taking bath in the bathroom. We have common attached bathroom. I had to wait and again i got late today for office. She today get up early in the morning because she has to go to temple. I prepared food lunch and breakfast she came with a plate of chole bhaute offered by the temple . She ate 1 plate there get 1 plate at home and again ran away to temple to carry 1 plate and my preapared food now will get waste. You know how i am suffering i am feeling like i should kill her. I pray to god please punish her i am doing everything for my family and she is wasting food comes in my way to office i daily gets late. If i have to leave job how will my home run. whether god teach us to waste food? whether god teach us ki jo ghar chala raha he use pareshan karo... WHy why god is not punishing her i m just feeling like crying why god is doing with us so.
              • If i will show my attitude that i am earning and you are supposed to live in a maneer then it will hurt my husband as he will think i am taunting him. Its not like that i respect him. If he is in a situation then its my duty to support him. I am in pain because my mother in law is getting undue advantage. You know after my 10 days delivery when my cesarean operation was done after 10 days she went gadganga with temple people in bus. At that time me and my baby needed care and when she returns my baby starts potty and she send my daughter to me to clean as she was feeling sleepy. I really don't like that lady she is so selfish and god even don't punish her even whenever i share my sorrow related to her some bad happens with me or my family.
                • E-Counselor
                  All it will take is one simple conversation. Sit with your MIL, FIL and husband and discuss that a lot of food and effort is going waste because of lack of coordination. What can be done to ensure that there is optimal use of resources? Ask your MIL nicely, in front of everyone, if there is a festival in the temple, and you are bringing prasadam, please tell me in advance. I will not cook that time. It will help me also. I can devote that time to do some other (pending housework, which is always there.) Ask them, pin down responsibility and ensure compliance. As simple as that. What is the need to suffer?
                  YOu are sending so many posts on how MIL is behaving on Radha Ashtami, but you are not praying to Radharani even once. If you pray to Radharani and say - Ma, this is my problem. What can I do to please you? Automatically you will feel relief.
                  From your many posts, I have understood that you don't want solution. You only want to blaspheme MIL. We are giving you solutions, none of it is even thinkable for you.
                  You are not in a situation to sit and think clearly even, you are so consumed by hatred and envy.
                  Please calm down. Take a minute and think what you want - you want to solve your issues or you want to endlessly rant over how she is misbehaving with you and blaspheme devotees and devotional process in the bargain.
                  Come back once you have done this.
                  And please, no more stories about how she is misbehaving. We get the picture.
                  You want to help yourself or not, you decide.
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